I am pregnant with my second child (a girl), and my son will be 2 when she is born. I was originally planning on quiting my job and staying home with both kids. My boss informed me today that he is going to nearly double my salary, and I'm sure it's because he wants me to come back after I have my daughter.
Right now, my dad (who is retired) watches my son while my husband and I are at work. He loves doing it and it's free! However, he just turned 60 and he has said that he is just not physically capable of watching a 2 year old and new born. My mother says it would really break his heart if he was not able to watch my son any longer. She suggests I find daycare (I would probably hire a nanny) for my daughter and continue to let my dad watch my son assuming I go back to work.
What do you guys think about seperating my kids? I am so torn, I really need some advice!
2007-12-13 12:57:19 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
I think this sounds fine. Plus, you need to consider that your son will be going to pre-school and kindergarten in a few years (about 2-3)
So, basically staying with grandpa will only be a few years more. By that age, your daughter will be 2 or 3. Perhaps, she can start staying with grandpa.
Another reason I would have your son stay with grandpa is b/c it's free. Daycare is expensive. If you can save money be splitting, then do it.
In addition, there is a huge difference between a newborn and a 2 year old. If you were to send them to a daycare, chances are they will be separated by age anyway.
Also, PLEASE don't listen to Saddam( first of all, her user name should send red flags).
Not everyone can quit their job and you are not selfish. Doubling your salary is an offer that most people can't make up. Plus, your son is building a lifetime of memories spending time with grandpa.
My mother was a working mother. I definitely don't feel like I missed out on anything. Do what right for your family.
To Saddam: If you think this women should stay at home with her children, why don't you get her address and send her a check, so she can pay her mortgage every month.
Can't afford that???? Then I guess she needs to work. \
Mind your own business. What are YOUR children doing will you belittle other parents on the internet. You are doing a great job RAISING your kids, while sitting on Yahoo Answers!
2007-12-13 15:17:28 · answer #1 · answered by J'adore 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
My daughter is 4 and goes to a daycare center, they have their nap/rest time after lunch for 2 hours. I have had two children and know from experiance that 2 yr olds need a nap, if you don't give her a nap she will probably become pretty irratable with you before 6 pm or may end up just crashing out at a later time and really staying up all night. I would keep giving her a nap for sure.
2016-05-23 11:22:53 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think it's such a bad idea we are going through the same situation but for different reasons. My kids are 8 and 2 and we're having a hard time finding a center that has openings for the 2yr old AND picks up at my daughters school. Out of 23 centers..yes 23!! Within 3 miles of us only 2 fit both criteria. SO we're thinking of putting the 2yr old in the better center for his age and my older child in a center right by her school that is more after school oriented and open better hours. I really prefer they be together but in your case I don't think it's a bad idea until the baby is older then I'm sure she'd want to be with her brother (& Grandpa)
2007-12-13 14:34:30 · answer #3 · answered by pookiesmom 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It may work while they are young, but your daughter will soon enough realize that brother gets to go with grandpa and she doesn't. Plus siblings need to bond. I would hire a nanny for both children together, and then work it out so grandpa can still spend time with him. Maybe in the afternoons or something?
2007-12-13 16:03:47 · answer #4 · answered by Aumatra 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What I think would be a great compromise, and it sounds like you are in a position to negotiate with your boss, is suggest working part-time (if you dont already), even 28-32 hours a week. Plus get a raise. Then you'll be making close to the same income.
Now you can have 1 or 2 days at home with both -they'll be together. Then 3 or 4 days with one with your dad and one with a care provider.
2007-12-13 13:02:16 · answer #5 · answered by lillilou 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
AHHH don't be upset. Let your son go with his grandpa. When people see a baby and a 2 yr.old almost always they go for the baby 1st. Natural instinct to want to oh and ah over a baby. This way he will get all the attention he needs from grandpa and you want have to worry about him feeling left out.
edit. I didn't think about the daughter feeling left out. Don't worry about that. When she turns 2 ( about the time she realizes there is a difference) your son will be going to pre-k and then grandpa might have the strength to watch her then. P.s. don't listen to that Saddam person. You do what is right for you.
2007-12-13 13:17:05 · answer #6 · answered by Bilinda G 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I think it's fine! It'll give both your kids a sense of independence. Also, it's something special that your son, and your dad will have for the rest of their lives. Maybe once your daughter gets older, she'll be able to join them. If you're worried that your daughter will feel left out, she'll have her own special moments with maybe Grandma, or even her nanny.
I used to get sent to my Grandma's house (she lived quite far away, and I would have to take the plane by myself starting when I was about 9 (wearing those darn 'unaccompanied minor' pin).. anyway, I would go for about a month every summer. My sister and brother never went but there was never any jealousy. My grandma would ask for me and I loved going. My grandmother was my role model - well she still is, even though she passed away about 11 years ago. My sister would have her special thing, which was to go away to horse back riding camp and my brother would take part in hockey camp. We each had our own thing, that provided us with independence from one another. I think too, it helped with our relationships in that we had our own special thing, which as a kid, it's good thing to help establish our separate identities... if that makes sense
2007-12-13 13:11:03 · answer #7 · answered by elementoflife 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Saddam is crazy... That seems like an okay plan, but kind of unfair to your girl. I mean how is she going to feel knowing grandpa watched her brother, but not her. I would suggest putting them both in daycare, but maybe Tuesdays and Thursdays grandpa can take him out. Maybe when you daughter gets older she can go with grandpa and your son. I hope this helps.
2007-12-13 13:04:47 · answer #8 · answered by Shelbi =) 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Usually kids are separated by age group in a daycare anyway. This wouldn't be much different and your son probably won't care until his sister is old enough to play with him
2007-12-13 13:04:32 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
It would be good for your son and his grandfather to be able to keep spending time together, and the baby will be fine with a nanny. I think that arrangement would be fine until your daughter is old enough to notice that she goes to daycare while her grandfather takes her brother.
2007-12-13 13:07:46 · answer #10 · answered by Raspberry_Tart 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋