modern laws?? don"t you just love them??

Question

Anthony’s Law of the Workshop:
Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

Bell’s Theorem:
As soon as the body is immersed fully in the bathtub, the telephone will ring.

Breda’s Rule:
At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last.

Cannon’s Karmic Law:
If you use the excuse that you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the next morning you will actually have a flat tire.

Kovac’s Conundrum:
When you dial a wrong number, you never get an engaged one.

Lorenz’s Law of Mechanical Repair:
After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.

O’brien’s Variation Law:
If you change queues, the one you have left will start to move faster than the one you are in now.

Owen’s Law:
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

Rubys Principle of Close Encounters:
The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are in a situation where you do not want to be seen by anybody.

Willoughby’s Law:
When you try to prove to the repairman that a machine doesn’t work, it will.

Wooly’s law:
When you are working late, the boss will never be around. When you are surfing the net the boss will always drop by.

Zadra’s Law of Biomechanics:
The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reachability of the area

Answer 1

Murphy's First Law for Wives: If you ask your husband to pick up five items at the store and then you add one more as an afterthought, he will forget two of the first five.


Kauffman's Paradox of the Corporation: The less important you are to the corporation, the more your tardiness or absence is noticed.


The Salary Axiom: The pay raise is just large enough to bump you into the next tax bracket and just small enough to have no effect on your take-home pay.


Miller's Law of Insurance: Insurance covers everything except what happens.


Weiner's Law of Libraries: There are no answers, only cross-references.


Isaac's Strange Rule of Staleness: Any food that starts out hard will soften when stale. Any food that starts out soft will harden when stale.


The Grocery Bag Law: The candy bar you planned to eat on the way home from the market is hidden at the bottom of the grocery bag.


Lampner's Law of Employment: When leaving work late, you will go unnoticed. When you leave work early, you will meet the boss in the parking lot.

Answer 2

In 2006, the Radicati Group estimated that, worldwide, 183 billion e-mails were sent each day. Two million each second. By November of 2007, an estimated 3.3 billion Earthlings owned cell phones, and 80% of the world’s population had access to cell phone coverage. In 2004, half-a-trillion text messages were sent, and the number has no doubt increased exponentially since then. So where amongst this gorge of gabble is there room for the elegant, polite hand-written letter?

Answer 3

Lol, funny. Star 4 u.

I just made this one up:

Shante's Law of Canines.

When a dog vomits, the newspaper will be approximately 2 inches away from the mess.

Answer 4

Those are great, fortunately, my boss is the principal of three separate ASAM schools, so She rarely walks in.

By the way, Mammie"s's a tool.

Answer 5

Some laws on the law books
are nearly as funny as those.

Answer 6

Funny! 100!

Answer 7

all of these laws seem to fit under murphy's law:
if anything can go wrong, it will

Answer 8

ha murphy's laws

Answer 9

nice ones our kidda!keep em rocking!

Answer 10

My mammie say"s i have to give you a star!and have you any more like these?