He is not working and he does not understand how important bills are and to handle business. We do not get along and he thinks that everyone is wrong but him and he will not accept blame for anything.
2007-12-13 05:59:21 · 9 answers · asked by Lynn 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
What? How old is this kid?
If he is of age move him out.
Tell him he has 30 days to leave, offer to help him find an apartment. Be cheerful, talk about the wonderful life he will be building for himself.
When the day of the move out day arrives and he has not moved out. Move him out, hire help if you need to. Pack his stuff and move it to storage. Pay the 1st month for storage and give him the keys. Tell him your love him but he does not live with you anymore. Tell him you love him. Tell him he can visit but no over night stays. Tell him you love him. invite him for dinner once a month. Tell him you love him but he doesn't live with you. Be calm and kind, but be strong, your kicking him out because you love him. kiss his check and say good bye.
By the way, on the day of the move out, change the locks and he does NOT get a key.
Tell him you love him but be calm, smile and no yelling. It will get better. And remember you worked hard for your home, You son should do that too, he will appreciate what he works for. Tell him you love him and goodbye.
2007-12-13 13:08:32 · answer #1 · answered by D J 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1. Give him the option-either he moves out by X date (make it sooner rather than later-no more than 45 days from today) or pay X amount of rent.
2. Stick to your guns! Absolutely do not allow pleading, weedling or tears to infludence your decision. Tell yourself that you are doing this for your son's own good-to make him a better man and a better human being. He MUST learn to be self-sufficent and all you are doing is hurting him by facilitating his laziness.
3. If he is not gone by the date you specified (or doesn't pay the rent) CHANGE THE LOCKS.
Finally-seriously-you are not doing him any favors by coddling him. You are only teaching him how *not* to succeed in life. Be strong now. He may hate you for it now but in the long run he will thank you for giving him the kick in the pants he needed to get his life on track.
Good luck!
2007-12-13 06:19:09 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
hi sweety. sorry to say it this way but i think there is something wrong with the way he has been brought up...well, there is no use crying over spilt milk, he's grown so we cant go back there.
i'd suggest that you have a talk with him and let him know what y'all feel about his behaviour. take him away for a weekend and have a heart to heart talk with him. you mention that y'all dont get along well, so how about you start there? lay out in the open everything and dont leave no stones unturned. listen to him, and he will listen to you. treat him like he is a grown up. you may be suprised at the stuff he tells you.
then help him get his feet on the ground. express your faith in him. probably the reason he doesnt want to leave home is that he has no faith on himself. you have to help him to build that faith in himslf, nby tellin him that you believe in him.
suprising what a little praise and lots of love can do. love of a parent is stronger than anything.
best regards
2007-12-13 06:13:57 · answer #3 · answered by Dar' Lene Princess 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My mom had the same problem with my youngest brother. He did the same. She sucked it up and gave him a deadline to be out. I think it was like 2 months. When the day was approaching, she stayed strong and stuck to her grounds. He moved in with a friend for about a month and then he moved in his own apartment. He was mad at first but he got over it. She was upset and cried a lot. But she still helped him out. She cosigned for furniture and bought things for the apt. The end result is he became a man and started taking care of business. As long as you are a crutch for him, he will continue to use you and not take responsibility. Be prayerful and stick to your rules and your standards. God Bless.
2007-12-13 06:46:46 · answer #4 · answered by Angel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Many states have squatters laws that prevent you from tossing a person living in you home and their the personal belongings into the street. You would have to legally evict him from you home. It will give him 30 days to get his sh*t together and move out. That is what my neighbor had to do to get her freeloading daughter out of her home.
2007-12-13 07:25:51 · answer #5 · answered by nykate_winslow 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him if he wants to stay, he has to pay rent, or else. If he still doesnt do anything, stop giving him money and lock your fridge. Let's see how it works...
2007-12-13 06:14:11 · answer #6 · answered by me_eressea 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
try using positive renforcment to boost up his confidence to get out that door and get on his own feet because right now it may just be because he isn't confident enough in himself for this huge life changing step and he just want to feel safe at home(may not show it though)....... good luck!
2007-12-13 06:06:52 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ask for rent and payment for board, (such as food and utilities)
2007-12-13 07:01:07 · answer #8 · answered by El w 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Change the locks when he is not home.
2007-12-13 12:54:55 · answer #9 · answered by Goodhead 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋