I've been seeing this guy a little over a month and things have been pretty good with us. He's in a bind right now and needs $150 because of an accident he was in. He needs it to get his car fixed. I've seen him try to hustle up the money and call family who all say they are broke. He knows I have the money and I was going to offer it to him, but didn't. Well today the money is due and he asked me could he borrow it until he gets paid at the end of the month...
What do you think I should do? I've never loaned any guy I've ever dated money before so this is all new to me.
2007-12-13 02:19:04 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Thanks for the answers so far. I'd like to add he has a job, but when an unexpected accident happens, not all people have money saved away. I know I don't. I usually go to my parents for cash, but his aren't as well off as mine.
2007-12-13 02:55:54 · update #1
Loan him the money ONLY if you have it to give and not get back. If you feel like doing something nice for someone, that will be a good gesture. If he pays you back, then great, if he doesn't, you will know the type of guy he is and can deal with it accordingly. But if you don't have the money to give, then don't give it to him. You mentioned you have the money, but if it will break you, then don't even think about it.
2007-12-17 13:52:44 · answer #1 · answered by Truth Hurts 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Boy oh boy , I sure want to tell you NOT to do this . The mere fact that he asked you is a very bad sign . He should get a second job or pick up cans rather then ask a girlfriend . Not very honorable . You will lose in either case. If you give him the money, you'll never see him again. If you don't give it to him he will be pissed and disappear too.So, what do you want to be ! Standing at the curb without $150 or standing there with a fist full of money .
Now, all this being said if you give it to him make him sign a note so you can take him to small claims court and get it back .
Life sure can get complicated. Don't let it. Never a lender or a borrower be .
Are you Listening !
2007-12-13 02:29:56 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
If you want to lend it to him, tell him you will but he needs to understand it is a LOAN that needs to be paid back, with money, not with sexual favors. It is not a gift. Years of watching Judge Judy and my own law schooling have taught me well. If you don't put it in writing, later on he'll say it was a gift. Only a month? You don't know him well enough to do it without making it legal. Notice that his family and friends who know him better than you do won't give it to him. Doesn't that set off the alarm bells?
2007-12-13 02:27:29 · answer #3 · answered by pitmanette 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
go with you gut... $150 is allot of money..... especially if you had to work for it.... why didn't you give him the money when he was trying to scrub some up.... is there a reason... you didn't give it to him because he didn't ask?.... how are you going to feel when you have to ask for it back...... that is the most uncomfortable thing for me to do..... so i dint loan money... what if you need it....you ha vent been with him for very long...how much do you really know him...it seems like your uncomfortable about the situation since your asking,..
2007-12-13 02:37:45 · answer #4 · answered by femroper 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't borrow him any money! If you do, have him sign a promissory note. If you don't want to do that, consider the money a gift. More likely than not, you won't get it back. Besides, he shouldn't expect you to, esp. since you've only been dating a short time.
2007-12-13 02:23:39 · answer #5 · answered by business as usual 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I say PUT IT IN WRITTING!!!!!!!! But on the ther hand the glitz made a valid suggesetion too-tell himyour strapped because of the holidays,if you don't do that definatly guard yourself, with putting it in writting. Then you can always recover it in small claims court, plus let him no your kindness is not to be taken as a weakness
2007-12-13 02:35:55 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
because he waited and asked you after he asked everyone else he could possibly think of and you were there to witness it, hopefully you were and he isnt just telling you he has asked everyone else, only because of proof that he has asked everyone else. THATS THE ONLY REASON!! then i would go ahead and lend it to him. But tell him you need it back by a certain date and make sure he's okay with paying you back then.
2007-12-13 02:29:51 · answer #7 · answered by I DONT CARE 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Only if he has spent a nice amount of money on you already-other than that he better ask somebody else-thats lame he doesn't have $150....? Big turn off.
2007-12-13 02:22:38 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 1⤋
yeah...no...I wouldn't. its not that you shouldn't trust him, and its not that you dont want to 'be there for him' or 'help him out'. but money has a terrible way of complicating things... and what if he never paid you back... just sort of 'forgot' about it. i wouldn't because - i have in the past. he needs to know that you are not going to 'support him'. thats his job.
2007-12-13 02:24:06 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
If you trust him enough that he will pay you back then loan him the money. But it seems as though he is not trustworthy if his own family won't help him.
2007-12-13 02:23:46 · answer #10 · answered by ? 2 · 5⤊ 0⤋