I havent seen her in 3 years, shes a distant relative. I dont want to upset her but she keeps emailing me alot. What upsets me is that i wrote some emails to her sharing my life with photos and recieved no response.
Shes old, in her 60s , never married, no kids, i feel she was jealous, shes also made remarks in her emails to me putting me down and i had to defend myself..
I tried not responding to her, we had no contact for like a year, then she invited me and my mom for thanksgiving, i had to email her back saying "sorry i have alot of work to do but thanks"... Then she emails me saying "i hope you make it next time with your family at my house and i have alot of projects to do myself"
I felt it was a dig, then i get an email from her saying "Today is my birthday, happy birthday to me,, she sent it out to many people,, so i just said happy bday.
Now she emails saying "I hope i see you all before xmas, my friend is selling nice stuff on ebay"... I responded "yes i hope to see you too
2007-12-12 18:17:11 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I said whats your friends user ID?
She emails me back "This is his USer ID (--)
I wonder how old he is? He has a HIGHLY professional ebay account""
2007-12-12 18:24:33 · update #1
i think its weird how she emails me, what does she want?
I know shes rude but i think shes off and dont want to upset her, do i keep writing generic emails like i have to her or not respond?
2007-12-12 18:26:35 · update #2
The best thing to do is ignore most of what she writes and just send a few lines on some general topics. Wish her good health etc., etc and that's it!!!
2007-12-12 22:55:49 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 7⤊ 0⤋
TRAVELLER ~ Would you be kind enough to email me via my profile if you see this message? Thanks!
~*~*~
As long as the relationship remains by email, you can actually just not reply to her! Let her say what she wants ~ you don't have to take much notice.
As it seems she doesn't bother to really read your emails, an occasional 'hope you're doing well' and forwarding a few jokes now and then will probably satisfy her without the need for any big dramatic confrontation on your part.
If she ever invites you anywhere, you can always email and say "sorry, we are busy that time" or you can email the day AFTER and say "sorry we missed xyz". If she has a dig at you, hit the 'delete' key ~ she'll never know but you will have a LOT of satisfaction :-D
Of course, if you just want her out of your life, change your email address, and don't tell her, but those actions can have big consequences!
Cheers :-)
2007-12-13 02:24:17 · answer #2 · answered by thing55000 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
stop responding to her emails. if you keep responding to her every email, she will want to talk more and more.
so to put an end to this, avoid her emails.
Or if you don't want her to feel ignored, simply reply to her email and say a 1 sentence comment about what she said and say "Sorry, I'm really busy but I will write more later when I get the chance."
For example, "Wow! I didn't know you could get bulk stationery and stickers on eBay. I'll write more later when I get the chance. Been very busy at work lately. Love, (your name)"
If you want to keep in touch and see how she's doing, keep it to a minimum like once a month or so.
I know what lonely is like. I don't have very many friends myself. I try to make an effort making friends but some people do not want or feel like meeting me halfway or something. I am always the one who writes very long emails because I say more in email conversations than I do in person. And when people do not converse with me much in their response after I spent my time writing long emails, I get the point and stop writing long emails.
Edit: When my son's best friend's parents could not attend my son's birthday party due to her fear of her son spreading her illness to my son, she didn't apologize in her email about not attending, she only said "I know it's sad.....blah blah blah" and the mom didn't even send a happy birthday greeting via email to acknowledge my son's birthday at least, the day of my son's birthday. She checks her email at work on the weekdays and my son's birthday was on a weekday.
I made an effort to befriend my son's best friend's mom but his mom isn't even making an effort. She made an effort communicating with me at first via email but I think she got lazy.
And also, another mom who didn't make it to my son's birthday party and also knew about it, didn't even acknowledge my son's birthday via email at least as well.
I was upset that these parents knew about my son's birthday and didn't even call or send an email acknowledging my son's birthday.
I wanted to give these women a hint via email saying that but I couldn't find a polite way of hinting, all I could think about is complaining so I didn't mention a thing. I had to get over it.
I know it doesn't matter to my son because he still had a blast during his birthday.
2007-12-13 03:06:09 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
live you're life and let aunty be the batty, insecure person she is. it's nothing personal; she just has no idea how to be a considerate person.
you, however, do not have to buy into her games. you owe her no explanations for the way you live your life or spend your holidays. if she invites you and you don't want to go, you can simply say, 'thank you, but we've already made plans.' you are backing out gracefully and not insinuating that you'll see her in the future. if she wants to respond in a cutting way, that's her business and lack of integrity, not yours.
2007-12-13 22:15:18 · answer #4 · answered by Julie N 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Doesn't sound like you really have much of a problem and are looking for things to feel "disrespected " about. Don't read or pay a lot of attention to her emails, and don't respond to anything that sounds like a jab. Ignore her except on your own terms. It doesn't sound she's really done anything so wrong from you question.
2007-12-13 04:02:38 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It seems like your aunt wants your attention. Sending out a birthday message to inform people about her own birthday is pretty desperate -- she must be very lonely. If you give her positive attention, she might not feel such a need to get it in negative ways.
2007-12-13 02:35:39 · answer #6 · answered by drshorty 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Eep. Sorry, no real solution here from me I'm kinda going through the same thing with my aunt too. I'll definetly let you know if I see a solution though.
2007-12-13 02:26:16 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just stop answering her emails, she will get the hint, can you not block emails from her.
2007-12-13 07:10:58 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋