What is the point of marriage?

Question

i just don't understand why people do it. ain't there somewhere around 60% that end in divorce?
other than taxes, what advantages could it possibly offer?

Answer 1

I think this is an excellent question. It is my opinion that marriage is for the purpose of security for mother and children during child birth years. Once the kids get to be about school aged, that sort of changes. By then you want a super incredible helpmate who can do all the million things you can't do and do it with a kiss and a smile besides - a little unrealistic, but it's a difficult transition from person to parent.

The odds are against people growing in tandem through such a period of acclerated growth - the question is "is humanity meant to mate for life?" Certainly humans want long term bonds with others - but for life? If religion was a bit more flexible we could opt for 10 yr contracts or what not and accept and deal with the fact that relationships are not permanent. As it is, we have set a very high and very unrealistic ideal and saddled ourselves with a very popular religion that frowns upon us for not being able to reach it.

Peace!

Later...
But that's just the thing - people never become one. They are always separate and whole beings combining to do something together - whether that is to build a life or a family or just to make each other happy.

Ultimately, every relationship has it's span and if we were really choosing a wise life long mate we would probably look for different qualities in the people than most actually do, don't you think? We look for people similar to us - wouldn't it be better to have someone who is good at the stuff we are not? We look for someone who makes our heart sing instead of someone who is good under pressure. We look for someone who is similar to who we are now and not necessarily for someone who is like who we want to be.

We would do well to re-examine the way we look at marriage and the role it plays in our society.

Peace!

Answer 2

In any society there needs to be a sense of order.. when we dedicate ourselves to a union of one man and one woman there is a more orderly life for the children who are brought into this family. Children need very much the support and influence of both sexes to be well rounded.. Just as girl children without fathers seek out men to fill the role and this often becomes troublesome for them in relationships that are dis functional and unhappy. God ordained marriage for a reason and it works when we take it seriously. Any one can get divorced but for two to work out the kinks in a marriage make them hero's of sorts to the stabilization of our society. I love it and am happy after many years of marriage.. There have been problems with in laws and yet, you don't run and you work it out however you can. It is worth it. I think the rate is lower than 60% but think of all the less than sincere people who enter in to it and not take it seriously. That hurts the stats.

If you want a good life, find a good mate and marry and work at it.. It is great and pays off big dividends in the long run. Who wants to be 70 and alone? No children and only regrets.. I know some like this and now they lament that they wish they had done the marriage thing and now blame everyone else.. don't do that.. Best of happiness to you all.

Answer 3

For me marriage is an invention of society. I don´t believe in marriage at all. I´m very much in love with my personal freedom. But this can be very different for different people. It is important what your feeling towards marriage is. What does it mean to you? What would be different if you were married? Would you feel more happiness, more security in your partnership? Marriage cannot change your relationship. It´s an illusion. It might bring up the problems faster to the surface once the honeymoon is over. Marriage cannot save a relationship either. If you are happy with your partner over a long period of time then marriage will not do any harm. Who needs it anyway? just my 2 cents!

Answer 4

Marriage is a combination business arrangement and emotional commitment that allows two people to build a life together based on trust, support and mutual goals. As has been shown, married people are more financially well off, live longer, and have better overall health than non-married individuals. Because it's also a sexual commitment, it is one of the best ways to remain free of STDs, and a way to help ensure adequate care for any children that may result.

That's at least a practical, observable point. Your estimate of divorce rates is a bit exaggerated, but not by much. The idea of being able to stay married for decades seems at times a challenge, and although I have no alternative to propose, the benefits seem so strong that people continue to sign up for the experience.

^v^ ^v^ ^v^ ^v^ ^v^ ^v^ ^v^ ^v^

Answer 5

Marriage (which, just so some of you know, was not created by GOD, it was created by HUMANS before Christianity was even conceived), is, like other people have already posted, for economical purposes, and for love. Both are correct. Back in the day, the process of Handfasting and then the actual Marriage was for two people who wanted to bond their lives together and become one.

Slowly, as times changed, so did the point of Marriage. Having sex and creating a child out of wedlock produced a bastard, so most got married for the sole purpose of having a "legal" heir, someone to bequeath all of their belongings to, or a title to, because bastards couldn't legally inherit titles. Like in the days of the bartering system, women were often used for such, also. "Take my daughter off my hands in exchange for 10,000 pounds a year," etcetera.

Interestingly enough, when I took French in college I was told by my professor that in France it is customary for people to NOT get married at all, but to simply live in a.. what is it called? commonwealth marriage?

For example, Kurt Russel and Goldie Hawn. They are not married and never have been, but have been together living as if they are husband and wife for a very long long time and have children (Kate Hudson, anyone??) together.

I am married because I wanted to make that kind of commitment to my husband. I would've been just as happy not getting married and making that kind of commitment to him anyway. But in the eyes of most of society, marriage is "legal" and recognized, where other "unions" aren't as much. Why do you think so many people in the gay/lesbian community want the same right to get married? Because society has made the idea of "marriage" more important than the actual commitment (hence the divorce rate).

I think that deep down, everyone wants to feel accepted. I know I do, and I'm not ashamed to admit it. If I didn't care whether or not my family to accepted my relationship with my husband as something that was an eternal bond and not just a casual relationship that would inevitably end because we weren't willing to make the "commitment", I wouldn't have gone through with a ceremony like that at all (not to mention the astronomical prices that "traditional" weddings cost these days!)

Sorry for being long winded, but there you go! :)

Answer 6

marriage is a legal institution.
A spouse can retain custody of children, pets, property and assets of a deceased marriage partner. A couple with only a verbal or in some cases only a religious pairing needs a long and expensive legal battle to accomplish the same thing. A couple could incorporate to insure ownership of property and assets but that would not cover children or pets.

Answer 7

i personally think that there is no need of marriage. If somebody loves somebody they don't need legal ties such as marriage, they would love each other the same even without its protection. This way when they even stop loving each other they separate more easily and without a hassle. If the marriage is done from the fear of losing that person then its just not worth it, as what is yours can never be taken away from you and what got taken from you was never yours. So, I always get this feeling that marriage is an unnecessary thing which is only done for social reasons.

Answer 8

married 31 yrs here, and to the same man for em all....... and I love him just as much today as I did the day I married him.... the trouble with todays thinking is people, young and old, seem to think marriage is easy..... WRONG..... it is the hardest thing you will ever go through...... not because it is a bad thing, but because it is a good thing..... I mean this: changing your life and putting some one else first is hard, but very rewarding in many ways...... having children is a deep promise, one that is hard to explain...... having the other half of you is beautiful and spiritual as well..... a person is NOT an island, I really believe that saying..... companionship in its truest form........ love in its purest form..... etc...... so many advantages !!!!! most you just have to LIVE, they can not be explained or written about...... sorry, wish they could.... the trouble with todays marriages, and I am not saying in all cases, but people are of the thinking and mind set *throw away*..... kids, parents, wives, husbands, etc..... we are a generation of *throw out the trash*........ *sigh*....... go in peace....... God bless

Answer 9

Married for 26 years here.

I would say the main point of marriage is that during the times that I really, REALLY did not like him one bit, I could remember that I made a promise and that I had to stick with that promise, no matter how much I did not want to at all.

And everytime he felt the exact same way, he had to remember the exact same thing about me.

That is the point of marriage, one body, one mind, one flesh.

Once one is truely married, in body and spirit, a divorce would feel like your body and flesh being ripped from you. IT would be literally painful and un natural.

If you did not feel that way about the divorce, then you never really got married, you just had legal sex.

Answer 10

An opportunity to get divorced. You could not get divorced if there was no marriage. Just think of all the unhappy divorced people that would not have an excuse for their failure if they never got married in the first place