Somebody PLEASE answer!!!!!?

Question

Me and my bf have been together for 2 months. I have really been falling in love w/ him. This past w/e we spent together and everything was great. He was really sweet and went out f his way to bring me a rose and make me breakfast among other things. He left my house frustrated on Sunday b/c he left later than he planned and missed a chance to work on an assignment w/ a friend (he's in college). We got in a bit of an argument on sunday night on the phone as we were both a bit grouchy. He was upset I was acting needy. We both said we didn't want to fight and made up. The next morning I sent him a text saying sorry and explained why I acted like that and I wouldn't do it again. He didn't call or text me all day (which he has never done). I called him before bed at 10:30pm and he said that he was neglecting his school work b/c of all the time he spends w/ me and is so overwhelmed w/ school and work and me that he doesn't have any time for himself. PLEASE KEEP READING BELOW...

he gets very overwhelmed and stressed when he has too much going on). Then he broke up w/ me. I basically begged him to not do this. He ended up hanging up on me and turned off his phone. I sent him several text messages asking him to reconsider and that things would be better but he has not replied.
I feel he made a hasty decision based on a state of stress and panic. I know he really likes me and was head over heels for me. I also know his brother influenced his decision. (BTW I know begging him and sending text messages was really NOT a good thing).

What do you think the chances are that he will want me back once he has had space???
(we have never gone a day w/o talking so he will def notice my presence is missing).
Today is one of our usual nights we spend together so i am really missing him a lot tonight and am SO tempted to contact him. Should I?

*****Do you think he is waiting for ME to contact him again (since he is probably sure I will and that he has me in the palm of his hand)?******

Answer 1

maybe if he misses you so much, then maybe he wants you to call him again, so he can apologize for that reason, but you shouldn't call him for a little while because of his work. so don't call him for a little while.

-HeartBrokenForever *(Diane N)*

Answer 2

Well, here's my take on your situation. Take it for what it's worth.

I can personally totally understand where your boyfriend is coming from in the sense of feeling overwhelmed with life. I've felt that way so many times before and it's a truely sickening feeling. I also know that when somebody feels that overwhelmed continually, it can make them bitter and cause them to make irrational decisions. Perhaps him dumping you was an irrational decision on his part. However, is there hope?

I think so. Clearly he has (or had) way to much going on in his life to handle, and it was simply to much for him to spend considerable amounts of time with you and balance out everything else that was burdening him. (not that you were burdening him) Based on what you have said, it sounds like you two truely love and care for each other, and it is often said that we have some of the most bitter fights with the ones we love the most. From the way I see it, it doesn't sound like he really WANTED to break up with you. Rather, he was so incredibly stressed and as I said before, he made a rather radical decision in the midst of some troubling times.

Because of this, I believe there is a good chance you two will get back together. If you guys literally never went a day without talking prior to your breakup, then you two must be very close. As far as advice goes, I would simply give him some space for the time being. Let him be for about a week or so, then calmy approach him again and explain to him that you didn't mean to make him feel so overwhelmed and that you want to be together again. Tell him that you love him with all of your heart and soul and that it tears you apart that you guys can't be with each other over an issue so silly in the first place. Really make him feel special by pouring out your heart to him, and see where things go from there. If he still doesn't forgive you, then perhaps he wasn't all that he seemed.

I really do understand your situation. I did the exact same thing he did to you to my girlfriend when I was feeling overwhelmed some time ago. I felt deep regret afterwords however, and almost lost her. Fortunately, however, she is quite the forgiving person and we got back together that very same day.

I hope all turns out well for you. I wish you the absolute best of luck in your journey. =)

Answer 3

Hun, Im Sorry 2 TRell U This But I Think The Guy Did tHE rITE tHIng.....Im In College And I Know Its All About, And Sumtimes Its Just 2Hard 2 Maintain A Bf/GF And Do Well In Classes, AND Work On Top Of That....Its Not A Lame Excuse, Its The Truth....If U Like Him, Let Him Alone SO He Can Succeed And U Nevr Know, Once He Graduatesm, U May Find Ur Way Back 2 Eah Other...Good Luck Hun :D

Answer 4

No, I really don;t think that you should call him. Although it may be hard, give him a FEW days without talking to him. Trust me, I know its so hard. But he needs to know that he can live without you being attached to him all the time before he would even reconsider getting back with you. A lot of couples go through this. Just give him some space and after a few days if he hasn't called maybe you could call him. He will probably be more willing to talk because he thinks that you'd be more rational. Maybe you two need to spend less time together to spend doing other things (schoolwork, work, etc). It can really help strengthen a relationship.

Anyways, I hope it works out okay for you : )

Answer 5

He is not waiting for you. It is very hard for you not to call. I know that feeling. He needs space. Let him go. This is the same advise for teens, young adults and middle age people.

If he feels you are needy he will run. Boys want to chase girls and convince them they are the one. This is one reason boys show off and they are the one's to ask us out.

I did not believe this either when I was younger. I always believed my guy was special. No one understood our situation. Then I had a relationship end ( not the first) and his brother became my best friend for a while. He told me these things. AND let me tell you it works. It is not about manipulation. It is about being secure with your self - that is attractive and it is health.

You should never have to beg someone to be with you.
If you made a mistake just applogize and leave it.
Men need more space then women.
Then dont talk as much and they usually dont think as much about a relationship as we do. When they have a good time with a girl it usually does not mean as much to them as it does to us. We read more into the actions of others than most men. do.

I hope that helps.

Answer 6

Step back and take a deep breathe and try being patient. It sounds that he is over whelmed right now. Stop calling when he has calmed down and is back on track he will call. Use this time to figure out why you are so needy in a relationship, because there is nothing wrong with a little space. To be honest this can not be a healthy relationship if he is neglecting the rest of his responsibilities. Sweetie, just wait it out and stop blowing up his phone and when you stop calling he will call.

Answer 7

alright..

from what you are saying to make a very long story short is that you fell in love with a guy after 2 mnths of going out, and you guys got into a fight over something stupid, and he felt like he needed space, and you guys got too attatched too quickly so your lost, and he broke up with you in a really rude way and said he needed space && you want to know what to do.


my advice:

* Don't fall in love too fast.. only bad happens from falling in love before like at the least of 3-4 months, and after 6 months to a year you can say you are head over heels in love

* give him space, you should only talk when he calls or text maybe one time a day, and DO NOT expect an answer because he will most-likely be busy.

* do something one a week. if that. he is in college, and obviously misses his friends. he is too new to the long-term relationship thing.. let him hang with his friends this weekend but be sure to see him for atleast 2 hours when he has time [ if not, he may find another girl not to be harsh!! ]

* he didn't know who he was in the relationship, and the fight scared him.

* he got annoyed of you [ you know this because he turned off his phone ]

* text him saying " hey when you get the chance please text me back i really want to talk this out "

* if he replies, good. he probably really wants you back as well. if he doesn't then give him a day or 2. if he doesnt reply by tomorrow around 8 p.m, it would be a good idea to call him and talk it out. if he doesn't answer hes truely a jerk and he isn't worth your tears.

* if you do get back together, which i will pray for! , then definitely put more space in the relationship. instead of being together 3-5 times a week. set a day that you guys can always hang out and make it like a cool movie night type thing and if he asks you to do stuff on like another day.. take it that hes in love! :]

i really will pray for you, i hope you listen to my advice and tell me what happens.

* please text him right now and add more details telling me what you did. i hope everything works out! :] ill check back in a little then edit it if you actually added details! :]

Answer 8

Honey, it's like this: I was in college and had the same stress, but if he really loves you he would have pushed all that aside and make room for you. I think it is time for you to stop fawning over him and seek out other boys. I am sorry it ended, but a one sided relationship is not healthy and will only make you feel worse. You are a woman; therefore, you need to protect your heart. Do not fall for someone so quick and you are less likely to become attached and have your heart broken. The right guy will come along and you will know it because one fight will not break you up. Good luck and happy hunting.

Answer 9

You are going to hate my answer but LEAVE THE BOY ALONE!

You are right though--he dumped you due to HIS issue.

Its great that everyting was good but you need to give him time to deal with his situation. This is how HE has chosen to deal with this, he has made the decision for you both--no its not fair!

But it is the way that it is.

I would suggest that you seriously consider seeing a councellor to get over your being dumped, don't tell anyone as its no one's business but your own.

Remove, delete his # from your phone, his email from your email account. & also pick up a hobby.

Also seriously give your studies a review, if he was having trouble keeping up with HIS studies due to hanging out and not time planning better--than are you needing to pull up your studious pants as well?

Also plan to take a course, they are free with most all colleges, of how to plan your time better. Learn organization skills, and when you do, gain a hobby, something you really enjoy doing, possibly a sport.

You didn't mention your age groups, but sometimes that is also important, for instance if he has never had a relationship before, he may not know how to balance school, a relationship AND whatever else he has on the go.

And that is OK--for him. YOu need to let him go. He isn't "the one". Especially if he got stressed 2 months into this!!

I suspect you'll find another great guy, once you get to see the school provided councellor & get your own life straightened out.

Plus try to talk to other people your age. It is POSSIBLE that the "women's & alternative lifestyle" centre on campus that most every campus has these days--could do something great for you. At least they have resources to good free councellors in the area if nothing else.

Good luck.

Answer 10

You need to give him his space. You can't force someone to be in a relationship with you. If you keep contacting him, you're just going to appear weak and needy to him. The last thing he wants to return to is someone who is dependent on him, considering it is finals and he is a busy student. You need to appear strong, and give him the impression that you add to his life rather than detract from the amount of time he has for school work. THAT is what is going to make him want you back.

If you do get back together, you need to negotiate some relationship rules for time management. It is very difficult to manage a relationship when you are a full time student. Working through this will help prevent fights in the future.

Answer 11

Hmmmmmmmmmm...............lets see!
Wait a little for a reply, after he realises what he done and start feeling the pressure. then one day ask him for a coffee. Dont remind him of the past and dont say sorry because u did nothing wrong. If this fails then forget him get another b/f dont get mixed up in relationship that doesnt work and is pressurising both. It doesnt work this way and will only bring about the worst in people.