My brother is a single father with a daughter of 14 (she lives with my widowed mother of 62). My brother left his partner (his daughters mother) 3 years ago as things were not going at all well between them. A year of so ago my neice went to live with my mother. She has seen my brother severely depressed for a long time now. He has been on anti depressants and valium for 10 years. He is unable to have his daughter live with him so has to live with my mother - that's working out fine but he has a huge amount of guilt and anxiety.
His Effexor dose has just been upped to 225mg a day and he takes up to 6mg of valium a day too, I think this is a very high dose. He has head shakes, he has had some counselling but he says it hasnt really helped.
All the family are supporting and encouraging for him and this has all been a big strain on my mother too. He lives on his own in a flat - he says he is lonely but has kind of got used to it. How else can we help?
2007-12-12 09:51:29 · 7 answers · asked by alipaul2 2 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Just to add that his daughter was being abused by the mother and her boyfriend, hence another reason why she stays with my mother. It was all terrible about a year ago, child protection, police involvement but now my neice is having abuse counselling and getting the help she needs.
2007-12-12 10:02:31 · update #1
All of the answers are good ones, moving in with his mother and daughter will alleviate the loneliness and could help, so could counseling.
The most important thing is to see about getting his medication changed. After ten years of being on the same medication, the body can build up an immunity to it. There are a lot of good antidepressants out there. Finding the right one can be tricky though. Here are some tips that will help him:
Keep all doctor appointments
Be honest about how you feel both mentally and physically
Ask questions about the medications side effects
Talk to the pharmacist, they know a lot about medications, sometimes more then the doctors
Know that it often takes time for new antidepressants to kick in usually between 2-8 weeks
If he gets too depressed, suicidal, homicidal, not taking care of him self, etc you can have him hospitalized. Ask him first if he wants to go to the hospital. If he dose take him there and have him admitted. If not then have him admitted against his will. They can hold him for 72 hours observation, I think.
Hope every thing works out for him. It is good that the entire family is supporting him. There are so many that don't.
2007-12-12 11:14:24 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My big question is; is your brother going to counseling every week? If not, that is a tragedy and whomever is writing his prescriptions is to blame.
Make sure your brother gets re-evaluated by a competent person that can look at the whole picture about your brother; what was the cause of the depression, when was the onset, etc., and evaluate how these meds are working or not and how they are affecting him overall.
That is the most important thing here now. He also is very fortunate that you are all supporting him, include him in things; dinners, outings, etc. Make sure he sees his daughter on a regular basis and is involved in her life too.
Look at his diet, he has to eat well, no sugar, some depression is caused by foods, allergies to foods, lack of sun light, etc., etc. there is a long list. You need to find out these things.
2007-12-12 22:46:30 · answer #2 · answered by MadforMAC 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
can he not move in with your mother also? being around his daughter 24/7 may help a little bit. also the drugs obviously arent helping.
does anyone know the root of the problem?
in order to deal with something as huge as this you need to tackle the thing that caused it in the first place.
everyone gets stuck in a rut that they get used to, its breaking it thats going to be hard. invite him over for a family meal, or go on outing together. do things that you know he used to like as a child (sounds daft - but one moment of sillyness a day can make a differance)
2007-12-12 17:58:07 · answer #3 · answered by Nichola C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Practical help is the best, do not fall victim to colluding with the depression.
Your brother has a lot to live for, and he may struggle to appreciate this, but he will survive with help from the family.
2007-12-13 09:54:39 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to ascertain the underlying cause of his depression and provide him with your support and understanding.
2007-12-12 19:26:08 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think i would be lookin into seeing a different doctor, or having the original dr. change his medication........be there, see that he goes into counseling and dont desert him..he needs his family....
2007-12-12 18:00:14 · answer #6 · answered by marcellahanseth 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe change meds and just be there for him but dont be to pushy it will make it worse
2007-12-12 18:08:35 · answer #7 · answered by sdk19988 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋