I am 19 years old and go to college, but I live at home because my parents are overprotective
Tonight was my 22 year old boyfriend's office xmas party, which my parents knew about for weeks.
My bf and I have been dating 3 years and I have known him for 10 yrs prior to that.
He is always good to them, has even done their food shopping using his own $
I go to school and work part time, and I clean up the house everyday while everyone is out.
Today I got lazy after a long night of work (I work at toys r us) and decided for ONE day not to clean up the dirty house
They told me I could not go to the party as punishment!!
I told them I am going no matter what, and my dad has threatned to either physically restrain me or follow me to the party in his car so that he can humiliate me later
I don't know what to do, my mom is out at her xmas party, I told my bf I would meet him at the end of the driveway
Advice?
2007-12-12 09:46:39 · 16 answers · asked by marm212 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
You are not the maid. You should however be responsible for your own mess, which it sounds like you are. You are old enough to do what you want as long as you aren't doing drugs and not staying out all night. Working retail is extremely hard work. Perhaps your DAD should have cleaned the dirty house. Is he disabled? Don't get me worng, I believe as long as you live at home you should abide by their rules, but you are not 15 anymore. They should trust you.
2007-12-12 14:56:53 · answer #1 · answered by snowwillow20 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Both you and your boyfriend sound like mature responsible adults. Emphasis on the word adult. Your father is being very extreme (and weird). Just go and have fun and worry about this later. There is nothing wrong with someone who works hard (like you do, going to college and having a job and helping at home), to take a breather once in a while.
Perhaps you should look into being on your own after this.
2007-12-12 18:01:54 · answer #2 · answered by Dovahkiin 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are you freaking kidding me? Oh gosh, this is what you do for your overprotective father, you go to a friend's house or go on campus, let him follow you, enact the old bait and switch trick. Tell your friend to have a cute outfit ready for you and meet your boyfriend at the party, or sneak your stuff out in a bag and put it in the trunk in the little cubby that holds the spare tire in case your father get particularly nosey. Have one of your trusted girlfriends meet you at the library on campus and have her grab your bag out the car and you get dressed and duck out and have her drop you off! It sounds like a lot to do but your dad is breathing down your back so you have to do what you have to do in order not to disappoint your seemingly wonderful boyfriend. Be safe and smart, good luck!
2007-12-12 18:03:06 · answer #3 · answered by Nicole J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your dad does NOT have the legal right to ground you, you are over the legal age of 18 and if he follows you to the event and does anything at all you call the police and off to jail he goes and then a judge will tell him he has no legal right to punish you in any way,shape or form and he will have to follow the legal eviction process if he says he'll kick you out of the house, which will take at least 45 days,maybe longer depending upon the courts caseloads and the city which you live in.
2007-12-12 17:56:20 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Wow! All I can say is, continue your education and get a full time job and move out. The fact is, when you are under their roof, they are the boss. No questions asked. When I was your age and thought I was grown and going through these same problems, I had to suck it up and abide by their rules. Just before I finished college, I moved out. It was fun for about a year. Then reality kicked in and the bills were rolling in. Just suck it up and try to get over it. There will be more parties. Thank God that you have parents that care enough about you and are protective. God Bless
2007-12-12 17:55:43 · answer #5 · answered by Angel 3 · 1⤊ 3⤋
Yes it is a bit extreme, but parents can be like that, i can only advise you to make every attempt to communicate with your parents that you are willing to listen to all their fears. Fears are probably the reason they are like this and if you genuinly ask to hear them you may be given the chance to give them real confidence that you will appreciate those fears and why they have them, and make every effort to convince them you will be careful as a consequence when you want to go out with others etc. Good Luck x
2007-12-12 17:53:20 · answer #6 · answered by the helpful one 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
tell ur dad its not fair and u wil clean up the house anyways he can;t restrain u from going because ur over 18
2007-12-12 17:50:35 · answer #7 · answered by *Angel?Undercover* 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
geez you're a little too old to be treated like that, tell them you're a grown person and not a cleaner. go to the party, it's your right, what's the worst he could do to humiliate you? as i see it he's only humiliating himself by following people in a car or threatening with violence...
2007-12-12 17:56:54 · answer #8 · answered by Sylvia 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I'd go and have a good time and deal with your Dad later!
2007-12-12 17:51:12 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
explain to your dad you were exhausted from work and
that is why you did not clean up the house that one time.
also, get your mom to work on him. good luck.
2007-12-12 17:51:29 · answer #10 · answered by Jerry S 7 · 4⤊ 1⤋