I Have A Cutting Problem?

Question

I Don't Get It. I Have Friends And I Do Ok In School, But Whenever I Start To Feel Low I Feel Really Really Bad And I Have To Cut My Wrists To Makes Me Feel Better Please Help I Want To Stop.

And Dont Answer ''Go Get Help'' Cause It Wont Work I Have Seen A Counseller And All She Did Was Make My Mum Think Im A Freak *Sigh* She Doesnt Understand At All And My Dad Just Yells At Me.

I Am 13 Years Old I Start Every Word With A Captal Cause I Like Too.

Im Not An Emo!Ffs I Just Have Strong Emotions Doesnt Mean Im Emo.

I Feel Low A Lot But I Dont Know Why Its Weird, It Could Have Something To Do With That I Get Loads Of Insults A Day.....

Answer 1

I cut too.
I know what you're going through, okay?
I find these methods pretty effective:
Punching my pillow.
Squeezing Ice.
Rubbing my wrists together.
Making a Mind-Map/Spider Diagram of my emotions.
Writing what's bothering me on paper and ripping it into pieces.
Putting my favourite song on.
Calling up a friend.
Hope they help. Remember so many people out there all know what you're going through.
Good luck. (:

Answer 2

Self-harm is used to vent suppressed emotions. I used to cut my arms when I had so much going on I couldn't get my head straight. Making myself bleed was a distraction from what was really going on, like it took the emotional pain away and replaced it with physical which is easier to take care of. You're not an Emo, you're not attention seeking, you're a stressed out 13 year old, counseller's often don't understand the complex emotions and mental pain that is so often behind self-harm. You need to find a way to vent those feelings in a less destructive way. The first thing I did was to put an elastic band around my wrist and pull it back and let go when I felt the urge to cut. It's another form of S-H without being as extreme as cutting. Find something you like doing and try and do that when the urge to cut is strong. Or keep a diary, I used to write a lot of things down, no-one ever saw it, it didn't matter what I wrote, I could let out my feelings. try getting a stress ball and squeeze it when you feel the urge or you can get a red felt-tip pen and use that on your arm as if you're cutting. You can scribble on your arm and then just wash it off. These ideas really helped me, they may help you too. I wish you all the best and if things get too much please feel free to email me (my email is available via my profile). You can rant and rant if you want. I can't judge you, I've been there, still am at times.

Answer 3

You have to ask yourself what makes you feel low. Once you figure this out you can find something else to do when this comes up.

I really do think you should consider seeking help again. You need support through this and I don't think you're getting enough. If you find the right therapist or counsellor than he/she will explain to your mum that you are just in a "funk" as some call it and need help finding your way out.

And besides, how would you feel if every time you looked down at your wrist you saw a handful of scars? Sad, angry, depressed.. I mean everytime you saw that you would remember the bad times that happened during that time, not the good. And I assume that you wouldn't like people asking you what happened to your arms and why..

So just try to find a counsellor that works with you and makes you feel comfortable and try to find something else to do instead of hurting yourself.

Best of luck,
Bethany

Answer 4

Try writing down a list when you want to cut of what brought you to that point. Even if you do still cut afterward, at least you will have learned something about why you do it. Please, stop early. Because years down the road, and saying you've cut over half your life is not enjoyable. Anyway, consider why you feel certain ways, and that will help you be more at peace with yourself. Remember, cutting is a cycle. You cut the one time in the day to help you feel better. Then you start to feel bad again, and you cut again. And it repeats, all day, every day. Learning more about why you feel a certain way can help you hold off on the cutting for a bit though. Consider writing a book about it someday. Or not, whatever. Just learn why you are brought to the point of having to cut. Just the knowledge in itself will help you put it off for awhile, until you can give it up for good, which seems impossible now, but you just start with baby steps and move on from there. Try saying you won't cut for 10 minutes and just breathe during that 10 minutes, and then go for longer and longer times. Eventually it becomes a game, and even if you do end up cutting after awhile, you stayed away from it of your own free will for however long. That can also serve as encouragement to stop for good, especially if it hasn't been that long since you started. Good luck, honey, I hope this can help you out.

Answer 5

I have 57 long and deep scars all over my arms because in my younger years I was a cutter. I quit doing it after the age of 21-not sure why. I do know that it had to do with some deep pain and that somehow by hurting myself and seeing the blood, it seemed to temporarily relieve that deep pain. Also, after we cut our body releases endorphins into our system. Endorphins are an opiate like hormone that makes us feel a bit euphoric. That pain may be unconscious. You feel deep pain, but you do not know why.

Talking about it and understanding it better helps. If you understand it better then it will make room for choices the next time you are tempted to do it.

It is not so much about self-hate as it is about dealing with the inner pain that never found expression in a constructive way.

There is a good weblink for this that should help

Answer 6

Enough people in this world are going to emotionally cut you, you do not need to do it to yourself, if you need someone to talk to try a friend or a councilor. Just know that you are not alone and all though it may seem that way, there are lots of people who love you, and would not judge you if you needed help. Reach out instead of cutting next time you are upset and you may be surprised at the support you really have.

Answer 7

Please try these links to the Mind website

Self harm - A guide for young people:
http://www.mind.org.uk/Information/Booklets/Other/About+self-harm.htm

Understanding self harm:
http://www.mind.org.uk/Information/Booklets/Understanding/Understanding+self-harm.htm

the information is easy to read and understand.

It maybe that if you could get your parents to read the information as well, they may get an understanding of why you feel the need to hurt yourself.

I'm sorry that your experience with a counsellor didn't prove to be that useful for you. It certainly won't have helped if she kept involving your Mum. So I do understand why you don't think it was any good.

What I would suggest is seeing if your local mental health charity has a Young Person's Service -

http://www.mind.org.uk/Mind+in+your+area/

we have one where I work and it sounds like the kind of service that you could definitely benefit from.

They can offer you support and guidance in a range of ways, but most of all someone to talk to who will understand why you are doing what you do.

Please give them a call and see if they can help you. It only takes a phone call to access them and you don't have to be referred by anyone else.

They have lots of knowledge but are informal, unlike the health professionals such as Dr's and counsellors, so this might suit you better.

Well done for realising that you have a problem and want to do something about it, help is available, I just don't think that you have found the right help for you, yet.

I hope this helps.

Take care and good luck.

Answer 8

That's a difficult one.. I would thought that the counsellor had some impact on you but that's not to be....It's abit like an OCD problem really isn't it. Do you ask yourself why you do it, what do i achieve from this? Are you having problems at home with your parents and it might be an attention thing. Can you talk to your mom more about this?
Me personally, i think that you need to see a different counseller that deals with patients who physically harm themselves and i don't think you will find your answers on here.
I hope you do get sorted though because you obviously want it to stop.
Good luck and don't give up ok...

Answer 9

The responses and actions one gives to people who cut is usually very unhelpful. They just don't understand. They fear it. Some say it is for attention or a cry out for help. I guess maybe in some cases it could be but I would say for the majority of us it just isn't. I used to cut in anger or with extreme anxiety. If you want to stop than that is what you are going to have to do. Just stop. I would suggest replacing it with something though. Holding ice against your wrist with ketchup over it or try snapping a rubber band on your wrist. I know you don't want to hear this but you should see a councilor, one who understands you (there aren't that many of them). You will have to keep looking until you find the right one. If you really don't want to see one then find somebody who will listen to you during the tough times. Good luck.

Answer 10

You need to find a few ways to cope with the depression, that's all. Cutting is a failed attempt at coping. Find a way that'll work better.

Diaries are good. Every day write 5 things that you're grateful for that day, it could be a really good cheeseburger, it could be a smile from someone special. It'll retune your mind to a more positive frame.


Meditation can help, so can positive affirmations. All three are ways to choose what your mind thinks about. If you take control of your thoughts, and choose not to feel bad, believe it or not, you can drive depression and negative thoughts away.

You know how if you try you can convince yourself that you feel sick? It works the other way too, you can convince yourself you feel great.

MEDITATION FOR DUMMIES is a good book, THE POWER OF POSITIVE THINKING is another. Your local library should have both. If not email me, I'll suggest other ones that are good too.

With a little work you'll be fine.

Try this. Remember the cursed diary in HARRY POTTER AND THE CHAMBER OF SECRETS? Write a cursed diary. Think of a negative thought or bad memory you want to get rid of. Feel it like a dark sludge stuck in your head.

Feel the sludge ooze out of your head, down your arm, and out your hand as you write about the memory onto a piece of paper. Write the memory or thought until you feel the sludge has poured out of your body into the paper. The paper holds that evil thought now.

Take the paper holding that thought and destroy it. Tear it up, burn it, scatter the ashes to the wind. That evil thought is now gone from your mind and your life.

Trust me, it works. Repeat this a few times a week until you simply aren't bothered by negative memores or thoughts.

This helps too, done daily.

Lay down in a quiet room, close your eyes, and take slow deep breaths. make each inhale and exhale last as long as you can.

First say to yourself "I feel my toes relaxing." and they will. Then say "I feel my ankles relaxing" and they will. Go all the way to the top of your head until you reach the top of your head.

Imagine that as you exhale that red smoke it blowing out your mouth as you exhale, taking away all the stress with it. As it goes out of you, you'll feel your body getting lighter.

Just lay there, calmly breathing, blowing out the stress, for about 20 minutes.