Help! My mom makes everthing bad even when it is a postive thing. She is so hateful, and says such hateful words even when we try to say something postive she makes it seem so wronge. I need a change in my life but she is the only one that i trust with my kids I have no help from the dad and have no one easl to live my children with that will take care of them, but yet I feel like she is hurting them, cause she says her hateful words around them were they hear can anyone help me?
2007-12-12 09:01:36 · 8 answers · asked by loretta d 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
It is your choice to leave your children with your Mum under a negative environment or to stop visiting/staying.
If you remain having your children associate with your Mum then you are setting your children up to believe this is acceptable behaviour and they will themselves be like her, believing this is how life is.
If you feel you have no other choice but to have your children around her, then talk to them and explain that how Grandma is isn't acceptable and show them the correct way to speak and act, leading by example
Your children will need your Love and Support, and show them that you are proud of them, and encourage them to do well with a positive attitude.
2007-12-12 09:21:39 · answer #1 · answered by Cindy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's the whole "better safe than sorry" thing. It's hard to know how sick your kid really is and seeing a dramatic change in their behavior can be a shock! Some parents don't have much perspective to help them judge a serious injury / illness vs. a cold / sprain. I have had to take my daughter to the ER a few times and wonder what's going through some parents' minds when I see a kid that appears to have a cold at one corner, a person who's so sick they're about to pass out in another corner, and a guy with metal shards (spelling?) in his eyes on the couch. I would rather expose my child to as little of that as possible. Also, there are unfortunately a few people who see the emergency room as free. True, you get a HUGE bill a few weeks after you go. But the ER doesn't require payment up front and some people don't see past that. I personally won't take my kid to the ER unless she is seriously sick or injured. Seriously sick has included a mild case of pnemonia, throwing up until starting to show signs of dehydration, and an upper respritaory infection accompanied by high fever. Why pay $500 to expose a kid to even more germs when their immune system is already weak from fighting a cold? by the way - I might be guilty of taking my kid to the ER more often if I didn't have so many medical people in my family. I give them a lot of credit for teaching me how to decide when a trip to the ER is needed, when a trip to the doctor is enough, and when it's best to just cuddle up with a good book or cartoons while letting the body take care of itself.
2016-04-08 23:24:01 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She may seem angry and hateful because she probably thought she was done raising children and now she knows you only have her to help with the kids and that probably puts a lot of pressure and stress on her which makes people say and do things they wouldn't normally say. Try and be a little more patient and see her side of it. As for child care it would probably be best to get someone else to help with that. There are lots of programs out there to assist with free or lower rates for child care. There are some good childcare centers out there it just takes a little research, but definitely look into assistance programs for childcare there are many. And the kids get to play with other kids their age, do crafts and Grandma gets a break. Hang in there and give Grandma a little credit at least she does watch them. Some Grandmas wouldn't even do that.
2007-12-12 09:14:42 · answer #3 · answered by MexPinai 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to take a deep breath and do the right thing for you and your kids.I could not live with myself if i knew my kids were being spoken to and treated like that when i was`nt there.I know things must be difficult but your kids may end up just like your mum and thats not fair,is it. Hope all goes well.take care.ok
2007-12-12 09:18:27 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop having your mom care for your kids - learn to trust others to care for your kids. Would you rather your kids have a caregiver who is NOT abusive and a stranger or would you rather your kids be abused by someone who is not a stranger (i.e., your mom)???
You are supposed to act in the best interests of your kids but you are NOT doing so by exposing them to abuse.
2007-12-12 09:09:09 · answer #5 · answered by Dina K 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to save your money, find an alternative support system, and be a strong mother for your children. I know its scary but you would all feel alot better.
2007-12-12 09:06:20 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't use your mother for child care and then complain about it.
2007-12-12 09:05:25 · answer #7 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
join the club :)
2007-12-12 09:05:19 · answer #8 · answered by Live:)laugh!love<3 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋