I'm a woman in her mid 40s who really never had much self-confidence particularly with guys. I know I'm intelligent and attractive. I have nice friends but I think I was born shy and usually lacked the confidence and determination to persevere with a relationship. Some guys have been really in love with me and even proposed to me but they were not right for me. When I meed someone I'm really crazy about, I often mess it up with either nerves or inability to communicate my feelings. I often make the mistake of not believing they could possibly be into me if Im really attracted to them. This is making my life hell at the moment. Every other area is great..I'm so lucky with good health, I look great for my age (often taken for early 30s) get asked out quite a lot and have a great job. Any tips really really appreciated!
2007-12-12 08:32:15 · 5 answers · asked by trying it 1 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Well for a start,how can you be born shy? I think you are convincing yourself that you are shy.Grab the bull by the horns and go for it! Stand up right now and tell yourself nothing is going to beat you,not shyness,not nerves tell yourself you are the most confident person on the planet.And keep thinking confident thoughts all day.And i find White wine works just as well.lol! So be CONFIDENT girl! Let us all know how confident you are in a few weeks.ok. now do it!
2007-12-12 08:52:54 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's a great book out there called starting over by John Grey the mars and Venus author. he gives some greta advice on making sure you're ready and (issue free) from your prior relationships. That way you can make sure that the new one is a good solid loving and healthy relationship.
Another thing is,... use encouraging self talk about your relationships like you used it to describe your body and your youthful health and good looks. That will set you up to expect the best stuff and ensure that you get it and not waste any time on negative (unwanted) thoughts.
2007-12-12 08:45:41 · answer #2 · answered by bigpicturerick 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
At home you can try this on line course it is free:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/health/confidence/learn/
I also suggest you take the herbal remedy kalms for your nerves, and if you can i would get some counselling but i know this is expensive and people oftern refuse to take it you can also buy some great books online to help you i advise you check out that link though :) best of luck and remember you are normal and there are loads of people who feel the same way as you.
2007-12-12 08:43:58 · answer #3 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've heard pole dancing does your confidence good, and there are classes all over the country. I think whatever choose to try, make sure it's a challenge, something different from your daily experiences, and it needs to give you a sense of achievement and pride. I think you know your strengths really, and you just need a prod to bring out the real you and show her off to the world!
2007-12-12 08:46:15 · answer #4 · answered by Heidi W 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
self help, it really does work.
2007-12-12 08:36:50 · answer #5 · answered by SuperChris 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋