Hello all. My name is Bri, I have three kids Ty, Hayden, and Ella (6,4, and 2 1/2) and I am 18 wks pregnant with triplets, well I recently found out that my husband Jay's sister Rochelle will no longer be in the picture; for her kids so we are taking them Kaya Elizabeth, 4 and Nicholas Patrick, 2 and will eventially adopt them. They are out of control!!! We use spanking with our kids, and plan on using it with them but dont know if that would be a bad i dea they have no respect and have never been disciplined. Kaya said a naughty word last night to Jay, and he said Kaya in this house that is simply not ok, she shrugged it off and repeated it again (which is what we call defiant behavior and our kids get spanked for that w/ cornertime fyi) and he washed her mouth out with soap. What do y ou think?
2007-12-12 08:25:33 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Do you think Kaya should of been spanked? And since last Fri. we have had the kids .
2007-12-12 08:28:36 · update #1
without discipline children have no boundaries to control their behavior. you cannot treat these children any differently than your own. if your children get spanked for a certain offense, then these two should as well....if not your house will be divided and your own kids as well as your niece and nephew will grow up to not respect you. you can't have different rules for them. i used to make mine brush their teeth with dishwashing liquid for using foul language....until they learned to do the same thing i learned to do as a kid.....blow bubbles!!!! then it was no longer a punishment. if she didn't stop after the soap, then a spanking and being put in her room with no toys or anything would have been my next course of action.
2007-12-13 04:26:08 · answer #1 · answered by 4Xthe fun 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have alot of good responses on this discipline. I would definitely go through other things w/discipline like time out and early bedtime, this would be regular for them until they understand this is the punishment for the behavior. Mine are 12 and twins and if they get any marks at school it's bedtime at 7:30 every night once homework is completed. You also can make them write the rules 10 times each, take away things they enjoy. But there is numerous things you could do for this and sending them to bed with also chores to do everyday which should be habit anyway, but give them additional chores to do. Once you see this through with consistency everyday and you feel it's not working result to spanking. I can honestly say if they know they are missing out of the other kids time having fun because of early bedtime they hate it, so try this it might work for you. Really do this everyday, for punishment or they want get the message. I applaud you for taking such a huge step for the kids, it really takes a special person to do what you do for kids that are in need.
2007-12-12 11:53:34 · answer #2 · answered by twila 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My answer might count on basically how plenty administration the teachers and the vital have over the the college's curriculum and coaching strategies. additionally; i might take a not elementary inspect any standardized assessments being given to the pupils, assessments of which rankings are used to grade instructors and principals. I do think of that instructors and principals are in area in charge for his or her pupils educational progression in the process the three hundred and sixty 5 days. instructors and principals do could desire to be evaluated; and people who're not powerful could desire to pass some place else. I basically don't think that the standardized assessments are a thank you to end this. the styles of sorting out that is now usually executed is positive for giving a picture of the place a pupil places while in comparison with different pupils; and that's approximately all those assessments are stable for. those assessments do not do a stable interest of exhibiting pupil progression in the process the three hundred and sixty 5 days. The assessments do not do a stable interest with pupils who start up out a techniques at the back of their friends first of all. The assessments do not let us know something approximately study skills, advancements in habit, etc. The assessments are actually not diagnostic; meaning that they don't coach the place a pupil's weaknesses are, the place their strengths are, or provide any theory on what precisely ought to be executed to help pupils progression. I firmly have self assurance that many states contained in the U.S. are spending a lot of money on assessments that don't help, yet in basic terms provide a snap shot of ways a pupil finished on that try that day, with none training that is usable so a techniques as helping pupils do greater proper. those assessments are often used to point arms and little greater. So, definite, in theory principals and instructors could be in charge, and perhaps lose their jobs in the event that they are actually not powerful; yet not if the "yardstick" regularly standardized sorting out.
2016-10-01 11:01:27 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Once the new children have a clear understanding of the rules, the by all means YES you should spank them. Teach them the right way, if they choose to do their own thing, then a spanking is called for.
2007-12-12 21:09:11 · answer #4 · answered by olschoolmom 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow, you have your hands full. In my personal experience, spanking always makes things worse. I believe you have to create methods like time out and taking favorite things away. Encourage good behavior by praising them when they are being good. Children want to feel loved and needed. Since these children need more attention, it will be very hard in the beginning but if you stand your ground and discipline all the children in the same way you will get the best results.
I hope this helps and good luck.
2007-12-12 08:39:01 · answer #5 · answered by Bella 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋
I'd go easy on the new kids at first, explaining to them patiently what the rules of the house are. They are not used to strict rules, it seems, so they may be shocked by instant sanctions. Only if they choose not to play along after, say, 2 or 3 weeks then you treat them as you do your own kids.
2007-12-12 09:12:59 · answer #6 · answered by cyranonew 5 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Dear Miss And Sir
First congratulation's on the new baby's OK
and 2 washing there mouth out help us and spankings and also put in time out is what they call it these days but back when we all was growing up it was called put on your knees nose to the wall and mommy did not wait for daddy to spank you she done it her self she always said to me i brought you in this world i will take you out so I wish your family all the best OK so sorry that you have your hands full OK
good luck I hope this helps you out OK
2007-12-12 08:57:01 · answer #7 · answered by no one here 6 · 2⤊ 2⤋
First I have to say you have you hands FULL!
When dealing with defiant/undisciplined or difficult children, take stock of what their personality is like then make a few plans on what you think will be most effective w/ them. I do spank my kids, but I think for a dirty word its a little excessive, I favor washing mouths out w/ soap. My mom used lava or OD green military soap which is awful, then we had to swish it around for a couple minutes.
My mom, my sis, and I have all had foster/court appointed kids at one time or another, here's some tips...
*Make a huge poster with short easy read rules of the house. aka NO lying... No physical violence (hitting, kicking, pinching...) Do what you are told...
*make " w/ respect/love rules for familes. aka In our family we share... We apologize when weve hurt someone... We give hugs to show our love and when someone is sad...
*Make a chart that shows clear rules for punishments.
*include kids in simple daily chores, explain that this is part of being a member of a family.
*Go to CHURCH! (I recommend a protestant/christian one, medium size, lots of fams w/ kids)
*Take them to parks, pet stores, indoor gyms as much as poss, to get energy out, make this contingent upon good behavior for previous hour. I use 1,2,3 for a point system while out, in store, running errands to determine whether they get a reward.
*try 1,2,3, time-out, also a REAL time-out is sitting in a chair, w/ no TV no talking, no nothing, in the middle of a room, where you cant touch anything.
*Seriously limit TV, they don't need it, sit down and have them color pictures, paint, play dolls, anything that requires building thinking processes and social skills, and is hopefully more excersize, esp TV that is violent or promotes bad behavior... Try VEGI-TALES, they are calm, funny, promote good behavior, and have a lesson too.
*Always sit down and count on fingers how many spankings, for the incident and why, then firmly bend child over lap, etc, never just grab and spank.
2007-12-12 08:50:35 · answer #8 · answered by Avodah 6 · 3⤊ 2⤋
no i think you should of made her write out what she did wrong not telling her what to write aksing her to tell you what she did wrong!
if that didn't work i would of made her daily send out an appolgy to jay...
if that didn't work spank spank spank!
Hope you don't mind but how many kids you got there! with 3 on the way i think it's great that you do so much for our future but i have to ask are you batty!
2007-12-12 08:34:06 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 2⤋
stern spanking. hand to bare butt - 30 smacks. that is how you mantain the authority and discipline this many out of control monsters
2007-12-12 13:24:37 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋