I am recently engaged and the past 3 months my daughter has been sleeping alone in her room, where I know she belongs. I was single for about a year and during that time she slept with me. I enjoyed it more than she did I think. But now she sometimes crys to sleep with me, I do let her sneak in in the middle of the night and when she is sick she sleeps with me. It has only happened about 5 times in the last 3 months. There is a part of me that that feels sorry for her because I know that I do not like sleeping alone. But I also know that kids should sleep in their own beds. Please tell me if you have similiar feelings or if you don't. If you can, help me to feel better about this situation and not feel sorry for my daughter.
2007-12-12 07:10:34 · 12 answers · asked by Alicia O 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
Thank you all, I am already feeling better, keep em coming!
2007-12-12 07:25:03 · update #1
Don't feel bad, feel good about teaching your child how to sleep all by herself and if once or twice a month she crawls in with you, no worries, if she comes in too much try a planed sleep over night you can look forward to in her room or yours or a camp out in the living room, also the cry it out method works, a child's cries in this instant are their way of protest not being hurt or abandoned.
2007-12-12 07:29:43 · answer #1 · answered by iceman211h 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Kids do need to have their own space. You are doing the right thing, don't forget that your fiance also needs you, and u don't wanna be single again do u? It's great that you feel that way because it just shows how much u love your daughter and how much u care about her, but she needs her own room and her bed, so maybe try to buy her a stuffed animal to keep her company at night and maybe a night light might help, and let her know that you're just couple steps away from her and you'll come if she'll need u at night, and there's nothing wrong with her sneaking into your bed at night, my 6yr old still does sometimes, whenever he has a bad dream, and I don't mind they need to know that they can count on us, right? So cheer up, you're doing everything right! And good luck! Also congrats! Did u decide on the wedding date yet?
2007-12-12 07:39:07 · answer #2 · answered by acia 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't feel guilty, at some point she has to learn that mommy's bed is off limits at certain times. For my little one, her reason for not sleeping in her room was because she wanted a "big girl bed" (a twin bed) instead of her crib-turned-daybed. Since we've gotten her one, I've been child free! WOO!
I still let her sleep with me if she has a bad dream or is ill, but mostly I redirect her to her own bed. If she does happen to fall asleep in my bed or crawl in during the wee hours, I just pick her up and put her in her bed. Its ok to feel guilty, you're not being a bad mom, just setting up a new limit.
2007-12-12 07:28:31 · answer #3 · answered by TigerStripe 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
A child needs to learn to sleep seperatly from their parent/parents. Becuase if you keep your child sleeping with you in the same bed and the older they get it would be harder to get them into the routine of them sleeping on their own.
Get her some pink duvet covers and fill her rom with little toys and gift so that she will feel comftable in her own bed, and overtime she will love being in her room, theres not need to feel guilty what so ever. Most parents probably feel the same as you do, making your child sleep alone is hard, but its for the best.
Good Luck x
2007-12-12 07:45:46 · answer #4 · answered by Salza 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
She will be better in the long run being made to sleep in her own bed. She won't miss it for long, its just because its kinda new to her right now. She will be just fine. Let her know you are there she needs you but she will need to be sleeping in her own bed from now on (apart from on very rare occasions when she is sick or what not). She will be FINE, and once you get over this hump which is the hardest part, she will be set for life sleeping in her own bed.
2007-12-12 07:15:21 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have to do what you feel is right for your daughter. It is true that I don't like sleeping alone, so why would I want my daughter to sleep alone? It is new idea that children have to sleep alone. Families used to always sleep in the same bed.
My daughter is just four months old, so I don't know how I will feel when she is older, but right now I like it when she sleeps with me. Sometimes though, I need to sleep alone, so I want her to know how to sleep in her own bed.
Don't let anyone make you feel guilty about how your child sleeps. At some point in their life, they will be ready to sleep on their own. They are only kids once, so enjoy it and don't worry about it!
2007-12-12 07:15:51 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 2⤋
it is important and healthy for kids to sleep in their own beds. Do you want her in bed with you onceyou get married? Probably not..she should learn to sleep on her own now before she gets even more acotumed to sleeping with you. It mau be hard for a few days, but stick to it. Remember, this is something GOOD that you are doing FOR your child, not something bad that you are doing to her. Your concern for her shows what a good parent you really are! Good luck! :)
2007-12-12 10:25:46 · answer #7 · answered by metsfan1560 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My five year old was never allowed to sleep in our room. He understood that his room was his and mommy never slept in there so he wasn't allowed in mine. I was single for most of the time I was raising him, until he was three. I slept in my room and he was in his. He is allowed in during storms and such but isn't allowd in our bed. He gets pillows and blankets and can sleep on the window seat. Praise your child for sleeping in her room. Make it her own special place. Let her draw pictures to hang on the walls. Use a nightlight to make it seem more cheery at night. She'll get the hang of it and will soon want to go sleep in her room.
2007-12-12 09:05:20 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
My oldest son is two and he has ALWAYS slept in his own crib, and you know what...I think about him all alone in his little bed almost every night lol
It's not uncommon at all for me to say to my husband "I want to go get Ian and bring him in for a snuggle!" haha However, I know it is best if I leave him in his own bed so he can get a good, rest-full night's sleep :)
2007-12-12 08:06:13 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
she is just learning to sleep alone. it's a good thing what you are doing. she needs to learn independence even if she is young. she needs to learn to feel secure even sleeping by herself. i am sure it's hard as a mother but you know it's right!! i commend you for not letting her sneak in.
she will be okay. pretty soon she will learn :) and you will be okay too. it's not wrong!
2007-12-12 07:15:17 · answer #10 · answered by Matilda 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋