to understand an element of privacy, not telling secrets, and our family business to the world?
i understand he doesn't do this intionally, but, how can i help him understand when he shouldn't tell things to other people?
recent examples:
-went to a playdate at a potery studio, he and i painted holiday gifts and when we picked up big sis at school, he told her that he just painted a piggy bank for her for christmas
-at the store the other day, he said mommy, why is that lady so big?
-he poped in the bathroom the other day during my time of the month, then later told grandpa that mommy got jelly in her underware...
i could go on with further examples, help please.
2007-12-12 03:21:11 · 11 answers · asked by sherman supporter 5 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
Wintersky, everything you described is normal.
At 3, you may be on the cusp of his understanding the meaning of a secret, but there's no guarantee he'll keep one. My 2-year-old has spilled many secrets my wife meant to keep from me (gifts, etc.). Now at 3, she's beginning to understand, but isn't quite there. She can do it in the short term, but keeping a secret until the next day is difficult.
About candor, don't shy away from awkward moments. I explained to my daughter why a person was using a wheelchair. "Isn't it neat honey that such a device exists?" After that, she would look at wheelchairs from a distance the first few times, then lost interest. The mystery was gone.
Definitely don't scold him because it won't make any sense to him. He's learning about the world. Punishing a child for asking questions is the greatest crime of all.
So, how do you handle the big lady incident? I would say, "People come in all shapes, sizes and colors, right? You're much smaller than me right? Are Mom and Dad the same size? Isn't it neat how everyone is different?"
About jelly, that incident is one of the joys and trials of being a parent. Sure, you're embarrassed, but tell me you didn't laugh about it later. If you didn't, you eventually will. It's funny!
2007-12-12 04:34:32 · answer #1 · answered by DD 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Those little things you will charish for the rest of your life, I could name so many my son did, and it's kinda embarrasing but they do grow out of it, you can't stop it, lol...my son was so amazed by this gay guy by the register at the store, because his voice was high, so he says (with a big gasp) mom this boy talks like a girl, but why mommy? lol and what do you say, you just tell him that's how some people are, and walk away, and then we did have our talks in the car, that some things are not to be said with strangers around us, maybe that's what helped, but don't worry they do grow out of it, my son's 6 now, and he knows better now, lol......so be patient.
2007-12-12 03:29:46 · answer #2 · answered by acia 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kids always blurt out things like that. My daughter once said the same thing... at the mall one day she said to me loudly, "Ew, that woman is fat!" I was horrified. Just constantly remind your son what's nice and not nice to say and there are lots of different types of people in the world and it's ok to be different. Also, try to incorporate what secrets are (piggy bank) and that it can be a good thing to keep some secrets.
2007-12-12 03:31:33 · answer #3 · answered by jmiller 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Sorry, but the one about the jelly in the undies made me laugh out loud. Someday it will make you laugh too, when he's grown up and you tell that story, it'll be funny.
It's a phase at that age, kids say funny, embarresing and strange things sometimes. All you can really do is bear with it until this phase passes and try to explain to him what is acceptable and whats not.
2007-12-12 03:31:31 · answer #4 · answered by screw the rules 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Three year olds don't have the self control yet. I would just be discreet about the things I don't want my children to know. What you are describing is typical child behavior and things don't start to change until they grow older and mature. You are trying to teach your 3 year old the element of privacy when some adults still haven't mastered it.
If you want to teach him the element of privacy, start off by setting the example yourself and through books that are developmentally appropriate for his age that teach values. Good luck and have patience.
2007-12-12 04:39:37 · answer #5 · answered by liliana 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Try to see the positives although I know this is easier said than done. I would rather have my children blabbing everything openly. They have made me wish the ground would swallow me up on occassion, but I feel safer knowing they feel free to say what they've seen or what people have said to them. Many abused children have kept things quiet because 'it's a secret'
2007-12-12 03:36:14 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
a chum of mine while he exchange into approximately 8 did that to his brother, with the aid of fact he ordered him to get him a tumbler of water. His mom watched the total difficulty, and after the brother drank the water she asked him, "Now do you opt to comprehend the place he have been given the water?"
2016-12-17 15:46:00 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kids do that, but I agree. You're going to have to tell him that it's not very nice to say things like that. Be consistant. ( I know some old people who I wish their parents would have got on them about sayin rude stuff )
2007-12-12 03:29:40 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋
as far as the bathroom you cant.
the family business shouldnt be discussed around them
2007-12-12 03:31:32 · answer #9 · answered by kleighs mommy 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
With kids, if you don't want it told, don't let them know about it. That's just the way they are.
2007-12-12 04:02:46 · answer #10 · answered by Kricket T 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋