Where do you get the strength from when you have to have your dog put down?

Question

My 13yr old lab her back legs are gone, she cant go to the toilet, is growling at the family, she has no life, I have to have her put down tonight, I just dont know how I am going to cope, I feel like such a *****, I asked the vet how much money to bring as I did not know what it would cost, that made me feel even worse having to ask

Answer 1

Sadly it all part of having beaning responsible for an animal and when it for the best for them or if in pain It is the right thing to do. Knowing you have done all you can and you have no options left, this should give you some comfort . Sorry it is really sad thing to have to do. Good luck

Answer 2

Oh you poor darling. It's a very tough thing to do but look at it this way. You have been responsible for your girl her whole life, you've done the right thing by her and taken care of her. This is the final act of care you are giving to her. She is hurting, she is sick, she's losing her dignity. I did some work experience at a vet clinic and I can promise you that when they are put down it is a very peaceful thing. They relax, they soften, they fall asleep, they let all of that pain and hurt go.

It is such a hard thing to go through and every time it has happened I swear I'll never have another dog - but I do! You will get through it.

As for the money, honey all significant events in our life come down to $$ at some point and you are just being realistic. When a person dies they have to make arrangements and pay the costs, when a person marries it costs money - even if you're having a quickie wedding with no frills. At some point you have to ask the dollar question, it's just how the world works and it has no reflection on you as a dog owner.

Be strong for your girl and know you gave her a wonderful life.

Answer 3

Its really sad when this happens as they are part of the family and the loss can be great. I really feel for you and the family. The best way to think about it is that you love the dog very much and you do not want to see it suffer. So in a way you are doing a very kind act and you have given the dog a great life for the last 13 years. Be brave and perhaps down the line you may think of getting another dog to help fill the hole that will be left. All the Best.

Answer 4

The strength comes from LOVE, knowing that when your dog is ready to go it is only selfishness which makes us keep them going. All her life you have loved and cared for her and now it is time to make that final journey with her. Be brave, be strong and know that you are doing the right thing by her. When all is over cry like a baby, remember all of the good times and (for me) have a stiff drink, the grief we feel for our dogs is no less than for any other member of our family and it does hurt.

Don't feel bad about asking the vet about cost, unfortunately this is one of the practical aspects which does need dealing with. Have the money ready and just hand it over, tell them to send a receipt on later by post if you need one so that you don't have to stay around to sort things out. If you are paying by card just do the transaction and leave (better still do it by phone beforehand so you don't have to deal with finance at the time). Provided you are a well known and regular customer our vet would not expect payment at the time but would send and invoice later.

My deepest sympathy goes to yourself and your family.

Answer 5

ah bless, it is the hardest thing you ever have to do with your dog, but when you take them on you know you will have to say goodbye, and by giving them a wonderful life, and them loving you in return, it is something that you just cope with at the time.

You will never forget your beautiful girl, but time will heal the pain and you will remember the good times. Dont be afraid to show your true feelings, and dont bottle them up.

Dont worry about the vet fees, they are so understanding in these matters, and usually send you a bill rather than you having to pay when you are so distressed. Vets will usually come out to your home if you wish, which I think makes it a little easier to cope with. Alternatively, you can usually make an appointment outside of normal surgery hours, either just before or just after surgery has finished.

My thoughts are with you.........I know only too well what you are going through. x

Answer 6

You ask "Where do you get the strength......."

You already have that strength by making the right decision for your poor baby.

Remain strong in the certainty that you are doing the right thing for all of you.

I can't help with the finance side of it. Vets have to charge and you can't change it. But I know its hard to deal with at such an emotional time.

I don't believe the person writing about duty and responsibility was trying to be nasty. More that they were saying that you are responsible and know the right thing to do. Maybe it just wasn't worded very well

Good luck

Answer 7

When we invite an animal into our lives, we know that unfortunatley this will happen at some point. No words will make it any easier but you must do the kindest thing for this animal, they relie on you to look after them and that includes not letting them suffer. Pay this dog back for all the many happy years and memories that she has given you. Nothing can prepare you for this and the gap it will leave in your life but you must htink of her first, we often are kinder to our animal than to elderly relatives.
I found that when I had myd og put to sleep, the vet visting my house made it easier. Some will do this if you ask so it might be worth thinking about.
Do not feel bad about asking the cost, it is something you needed to know.
Good luck for this evening and think about the very happy life you have given your dog.

Answer 8

You find the strength from your maternal instinct, from within you, your dog bless her is telling you she has had enough.Treat your dog like you would a child of yours my love, you would know instinctively that you would not want your child to suffer a moment longer than was necessary. Never expect any more or less from your dog that you would your children.You have no need to feel gulity because as hard as this is for you, you are doing the dog the most wonderful gift you could, she will be pain free and will not be suffering anymore.Listen to her, she is telling you she is ready to go, so trust her own instincts ans act upon them. Your vet if a good vet should let you pay after the event if you wish, I know ours does, he will not take payment for this until you have had time to grieve.Be strong and know in your heart you are doing the best for your dog, and that is what is important in the end.This is the final act of love you can show her, thats how you have to look at it ok, do not look at it any other way.

Answer 9

Oh my word! My deepest sympathies to you.

I had to do the same thing with my German Shephard a few months ago - he's back legs had also given in and he wasn't having a quality life.

I know it is hard to think of it that way, but if you do decide to go and get your dog put down, it will give her so much relief from the pain and misery she's going through now. It's not fair to make them suffer that much just because you don't want to see them go.

You will always have memories and moments to cling too - and a lot of photo's and stuff too, hopefully. I know I do... (And now I got tears in my eyes too!)

I wish you nothing but the best of luck with this tough call, but in the end, your dog will most likely be better off and no longer suffering if you do decide to let her be put down. I trust so.

Good luck, and I pray to God you have a good support system of friends and family to support you like I had - you need them a lot after making such a heart-tearing choice.

Good luck - you are in my thoughts!

Answer 10

Oh, I'm so sorry. There just is no easy answer to this. We had to have our beloved German Pointer put to sleep for much the same reasons last year. i have to say, my vet was absolutely fantastic, and was a great help to us. He told us to contact the Blue Cross ( they do have a website). Here you can receive counselling, and you can also leave a memorial for your pet on this site.
We paid about £60 at the vets, and then had him taken to a pet crematorium so that he would be cremated separately. this cost us about £150. We now have Murphys ashes at home in a casket. I will never bury him.....his ashes will be scattered with mine when I die. Thats the only way I have been able to cope with all this .....its knowing that he is still here with me....even if only in spirit.
I'll be thinking about you and your poor dog all day.

EDIT;

Check out a poem called ''If it should be'' I think you'll draw strength from this.

Answer 11

It's an incredibly hard thing to do. But from the sound of things, you're making the right decision. It's one kindness we allow our pets that we don't allow our own kind. To leave with some dignity left. It never gets any easier, but perhaps the mindset that you're releasing her from her pain, not that you're just "puting her down". (Not that there's anything wrong with putting it that way, I say the same thing). And there's nothing wrong with asking how much money to bring. That way you were prepared. Although, if you have a relationship with your veterinarian, not sure how yours works, but I know in the office I work in, providing there's a doc/patient relationship, we don't even bill the owner at the time of the euthanasia, unless they specifically request it. We usually wait, send them a sympathy card, and then bill them about 10 days later. Just keep the thoughts of the good times with your girl, and know you did the best that you could for her.