Driving to work this morning in the fast lane of the motorway, I looked over to my left and there was this woman in a brand new Jaguar doing just 50 mph, with her face right up to the rear view mirror putting on her eyeliner.
I looked away for a couple of seconds and when I looked back, she was halfway over into my lane, still working on that makeup.
As a man, I don't scare easily but she scared me so much that:-
I dropped my electric shaver, which knocked the toast out of my other hand. In all the confusion of trying to straighten out the car using my knees against the steering wheel, it knocked my mobile phone away from my ear, which fell into the coffee between my legs, splashed and soaked my trousers, ruined the phone and disconnected a very important call.
Damn Those Stupid Women Drivers!
2007-12-11 21:33:15 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
OUCH! That was so predictably funny! Predictably as in what can one expect when a man tries to do more than one thing at the same time, even if it is in a freakin' joke? Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! LMAO!!!
2007-12-11 21:44:09 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
Great joke, I have seen you on jokes and riddles before, I am there a lot also. Driver jokes are great..
A Missouri State Trooper pulled a car over for speeding. When the trooper asked the driver why he was speeding, the driver answered that he was a magician and a juggler and he was on his way to Branson to do a show that night and didn't want to be late.
The trooper told the driver he was fascinated by juggling, and if the driver would do a little juggling for him that he wouldn't give him a ticket.
The driver told the trooper that he had sent all of his equipment on ahead and didn't have anything to juggle.
The trooper told him that he had some flares in the trunk of his squad car and asked if he could juggle them. The juggler stated that he could, so the trooper got three flares, lit them and handed them to the juggler.
While the man was doing his juggling act, a car pulled in behind the squad car, a drunk got out and watched the performance briefly; he then went over to the squad car, opened the rear door and got in.
The trooper observed him doing this and went over to his squad car, opened the door and asked the drunk what he thought he was doing.
The drunk replied, "Might as well take my *** on to jail, there's no way in hell I can pass that test."
Merry Xmas.....
2007-12-11 21:42:02 · answer #2 · answered by Jake5282 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
super. a salesperson knocked on the door of a house in a clean housing progression and a girl spoke back the door. He began, "Ma'am, i'm promoting the latest innovation in vacuums, it somewhat is the appropriate little gadget I even have seen in an prolonged time," and with that, he proceeded to offload on her new carpet a mixture of ketchup, salsa, dirt, grape juice, etc. as she watched, horrified. He reported, "If this vacuum would not freshen up that mess, i'm going to devour it!" She reported, "might you like a fork?! we've not have been given the ability on yet!"
2016-11-26 00:16:21 · answer #3 · answered by rushford 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
being a women i love this joke thank you for the smile x
2007-12-12 09:27:44 · answer #4 · answered by sweetie 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Funny x x
2007-12-11 21:39:45 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Funny! Bad day for u huh, its becoz of that woman. ^^
2007-12-11 22:01:04 · answer #6 · answered by Rai 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That is SO funny! Thank you. for makin' me
laugh!!
2007-12-11 21:59:04 · answer #7 · answered by rrainn 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
definitely funny
2007-12-11 21:37:33 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
hahaha very funny
2007-12-11 22:29:48 · answer #9 · answered by anna 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yeah that is really funny....
hahaha
2007-12-11 21:40:27 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋