I have been with my girlfriend on and off for a while, about 7months, but for the past month we stayed together the whole time, i have known her for almost a year and i really love her, emotionally.
But the thing is, im not as attracted to her phisically as i was before (it happened after i found out she cheated on me, but i dont want to mention that if i break up with her because i care about her feelings and know she regrets it). I dont kiss her too much, when we have sex, i tend to fantasize it with other girls, or else it just dosen't feel too good.
But she is the best perosn i have ever known and she cares so much about me and i care about her more then anything, we are allways together, but i sort of see her as a friend.
What should i do?
And how do i not hurt her feelings?
2007-12-11 21:15:41 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Each day you spend with her is a more painful day not just for you but for her as well. If she finds out that you dont feel the same passion on her ever since, it will hurt even more.
you should be honest. the reality always hurts but the earlier it is wounded, the earlier it will heal.
2007-12-11 21:20:36 · answer #1 · answered by YAHOO ANSWERER 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will hurt her feelings if u stay with her because she is holding on to u and doesn't feel the same way u do. u fantasizing on someone else!!! u need more arguments?!
It's happening because u have some idea about her that u haven't shared with her and haven't been honest, it will hurt her on the long term. If u feel u r capable of being honest with her, tell her about the chaeting and how u feel, u love her so u will be very considering and gentle with her, don't blame her, just explain that it changed some things, not the way u feel but the way the whole thing is. tell her what u just wrote but son't mention the other girls during sex, that will kill her, it's so harsh. maybe after u talk to her, u hear what she has to say, u may change ur view back to what it was the first place or u will be sure she is just a friend and u will arrange things accordingly.
2007-12-11 21:39:12 · answer #2 · answered by Me 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you think you can revive the old feeling? If you cannot trust her again or if you see her differently now then its time to move on. You can remain friends but just remember not to fall into the trap of running to your comfort zone whenever you feel like it. If you do you will keep having doubts about your relationship with her. If the feeling is gone at this point, end it. If you are truly meant to be together, only time will tell when all the hurt has gone. Good luck!
2007-12-11 21:20:47 · answer #3 · answered by Jessie7 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All of that is going to eat you up inside and eventually come out. So tell her the truth about how you feel. If you hold it in and tell her later it will be worse. If your not attracted to her don't tell her you are attracted don't pretend you are. tell her the truth about that. And not to mention, if she has cheated once, there is the possibility she will do it again.
2007-12-11 21:21:48 · answer #4 · answered by JJ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if ur feelings for her r more as a friend just tell her that,,,,there is no doubt that no matter how u break it to her feelings will get hurt but I would say that my feelings would be chattered to know that I am being intimate with someone who has to think about someone else while in the act.....it would be better to let go then to play games and live a lie......u r just playing with her and for what...not to hurt her feelings...hello u r playing with her feelings....take time apart...then reevaluate your feelings
2007-12-11 21:24:03 · answer #5 · answered by girlygirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi sorry to say but the longer this goes on the worse her feelings are going to get hurt. Just be honest with her and tell her you can't get past it even though you know how sorry she is, good luck. You seem to be very considerate of her feelings under the circumstances....
2007-12-11 21:19:11 · answer #6 · answered by misstth 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She obviously didnt care about your feelings when she cheated on you. so you're caring too much about her feelings. Tell her the truth. Maybe she'll learn and regret it for the rest of her life. I know how it feels. Cheating is INEXCUSEABLE. And i tried to make her feel as guilty as possible. She deserved it...
2007-12-11 21:19:47 · answer #7 · answered by Johnny21usaf 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mend your fences for mutual happiness and longevity of relationship. There is nothing wrong in fantasising other women during intimate moments. That's natural.
2007-12-11 21:19:46 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep on dating
2007-12-11 21:18:33 · answer #9 · answered by nobody 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know this is easy for me to say, for i am not in your shoes,
but forgive her. from the way you describe her i think it
would be a wise and prudent move. good luck.
2007-12-11 21:20:43 · answer #10 · answered by Jerry S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋