A brief example of a situation for those who need one lets say the woman fell for the wrong guy. He ended up leaving her while she was still pregnant, and hasn’t seen, or spoke to the mom, or child once so he is completely out of the picture. She doesn’t expect anyone to become involved in her child’s life at all unless the potential relationship becomes spending their lives together kind of serious so there isn’t any pressure to step in as a father figure. The only thing she expects is that if, and when the relationship becomes that serious the guy understands the child is a part of it at that point, and if nothing else he has to at least be willing to accept that, and be a decent friend for that child.
2007-12-11 16:52:17 · 13 answers · asked by ? 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I'd like to say no, but if I found out my girlfriend had a child before I started dating her I don't think it would have stopped me...
Yeah...
2007-12-11 16:56:06 · answer #1 · answered by Skaggy says: 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
When I first started dating my husband, I knew he had a son. It was a little scary at first- but I dated him for who he was, and decided that if it was a package deal, it was worth it. Now, I am so happy I did because My hubby is the BEST man I know. Also- even though his son isn't "mine", he is mine- by choice, which makes the relationship mean more to him. We've been married for 12 years tomorrow, and I wouldn't think twice before doing it again.
Also- My sister is getting married this summer, to a man who has no kids, but she has 5 boys. He slowly crept into their lives, and now they all love each other like they had never been strangers.
2007-12-12 01:03:28 · answer #2 · answered by depax1 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If the guy was a good father, and really loved/took care of his child, then I'd know he would treat me well too. If he was a deadbeat who didn't pay child support probably not.
I would take it slow, though, because it's not fair for a child to get attatched to people wo keep coming in and out of their lives..I'd probably tell him I didn't want to meet his child for a few months until we knew for sure that it was going to be a serious relationship, just for the sake of the child.
2007-12-12 00:58:50 · answer #3 · answered by Allyson♥Marie 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋
i would if that person is stable and patient enough to handle my needs and give me the attention that i deserve but at the same time a good parent for the child some who loves to listen to my concerns and best interests for the kid if you date some one with a kid you have to be careful and be very patient the kid needs more affection then you do so if you decide to take that step care for that child as if it''s yours in time get to know the kid
and love that person. but if the person wants you to be a stand in for the father let go but if it's in your heart by all means stay you will reciive your blessings
2007-12-12 01:04:32 · answer #4 · answered by Alicia G 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're dating the someone. Not the child.
Need I say more?
EDIT: Maybe I do.
What I mean is that if you want to be with someone, it's for who they are, and you know, because you care for him/her. Having a child is something perhaps you hadn't planned on, but you're supposed to accept the other person with everything they've got, right? Good stuff, bad stuff, five year old stuff...
I see it that way. I wouldn't mind if she had a kid, if I cared for her.
2nd EDIT: Potrik, I respect your ideas, but I have to disagree. For me, "wedlock" is nothing more than a bunch of old religious guys (that in some cases never marry), giving you a piece of paper after you pay them bunches of money to "marry you". I'm not saying I wouldn't marry, but love is more important than a piece of paper. It's so unnecessarily indispensable, and so indispensably unnecessary.
2007-12-12 00:59:17 · answer #5 · answered by Vhazhiphor 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Hello Lady. I would date someone with a child because I have a child.
I would reccomend keeping anyone that you date out of your family life for as long as possible.
you can email me anytime you want if you have questions.
2007-12-12 01:01:22 · answer #6 · answered by Spoonfull of Sugar 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
My wife had a 2 year old son when we met. I fell in love with her and he was an added bonus. I love him dearly. If I could go back and do it over, I wouldnt change a thing.
2007-12-12 01:05:34 · answer #7 · answered by CableMan 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If the child was born out of wedlock, then never.
Because, the girl did have sex before marriage, which shows that she is morally corrupted. Our elders always tell us to remain a virgin till marriage, but if we are disobedient, it shows that we made a mistake in spite of knowing that what we were doing was wrong! In other words, it shows that the girl does not have strong morals. No one wants a wife like that!
If the child was born within a marriage and the wife divorced, I would not have any problem marrying the divorcee and accepting the step-child.
2007-12-12 00:59:20 · answer #8 · answered by Protik Maitra 6 · 0⤊ 5⤋
No, I wouldn't. I've been careful, if I wanted a child I would have gotten knocked up by now, but I haven't. So why would I want to help take care of someone else's?
2007-12-12 00:58:59 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
Yes i would ....... i love kids.... if you both understand each other kids wont be a problem......just a matters of how u both handle the situation ..... but im pretty sure will work ......good luck
2007-12-12 01:25:11 · answer #10 · answered by happy2befree 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋