I want a baby!! I know you should wait til' your married, but he doesn't beleive 2 people should HAVE to get married. Yes, he's one of those. And I have choosen to accept that. So please just disregard the fact that we are not married and focus on my actual question. He has been hinting around kinda about it, and we have only been together 6 months. He told me one time a few weeks ago that he was going to get me this for xmas and pointed at a picture of a baby. And then he told me that he asked his mom what she wanted for xmas, and she told him a grand baby. So I'm kinda unsure of how to tell him that IS what I want. I have a stable job. I live on my own. I can afford a baby and I know I could love him/her with all of my heart and soul. So if you understand where I am coming from please help me find a way to tell him this is what I reallllllly do want.
2007-12-11 15:11:24 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
Marriage only makes it legal. If you truly want his baby, then maybe just ask him what would happen if he really did get you a baby for christmas. Do you live together yet? I understand about not needing to be married, but it is a lot easier to raise a baby, if you live together. If you don't live together then maybe that should be your first step. Most importantly TALK about it.
2007-12-11 15:21:47 · answer #1 · answered by carinabck 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I know you said that you've accepted him not wanting to get married....but have you really? I mean, so you're just going to settle for never getting married should this relationship work out? In my opinion, someone saying that is a cop out. They want to get married, they just aren't sure they want to marry YOU. Not being married gives someone the freedom to cut and run at some point. If he loves you, he should have no problem making that ultimate commitment to you. Also, unless you're married, in some states, you will have absolutely no say in anything pertaining to him....medical decisions, etc no matter how long you've been together. Just something to think about.
About your question, next time he mentions or hints at a baby, that can be your window of opportunity to start a discussion about it. Ask him if he wants to have a baby with you. Then go from there.
2007-12-11 23:41:37 · answer #2 · answered by First Lady 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
6 months seems an awfully short time to be with someone before having a child with them.
While I think marriage is important, it's not necessary, however I do think having a fairly long term and stable relationship is PARAMOUNT when having a child.
I would suggest the two of you wait a little longer just to make sure you're compatible and can provide a long term relationship to support a child.
Whatever you do make sure the two of you DISCUSS everything! This is not something to rush into, you have plenty of time.
2007-12-11 23:30:48 · answer #3 · answered by Rachel B 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well you can't be scared about talking to him about this stuff. Open communication is important in a relationship and will be very important when raising a baby together. If he is already saying things then he is opening up the conversation for you. It is time for a sit down with him and talk this out and decide if now is the time to start trying. The goodnews is he is already talking about it so now you just go with the flow.
2007-12-11 23:18:51 · answer #4 · answered by momof3boys 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Please get married first. You would be disregarded by many for your unwise decision, but importantly it would be wrong for the child. If you two really do love eachother, then you would get married, not have a baby first. That just doesn't make any sense. And like many, when I see a child born out of wedlock I think of two immature people screwing around without birth control. Sorry to break it to you.
2007-12-11 23:18:55 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
i am also unsure why you are not sure how to tell him??? he seems to want the same thing! and so does his mom!
maybe count & see when you are ovulating and make a romantic night w/ him - then tell him you want to make a baby. cheesy but he will get it :-P
2007-12-12 00:00:29 · answer #6 · answered by Reese's Mom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you can't tell your boyfriend that you want one, you're not ready to raise one.
there will be many many many more difficult conversations that come up in the course of that child's life.
2007-12-11 23:16:09 · answer #7 · answered by ICARRESS 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
If he is unwilling to make a commitment to you I doubt he will make a commitment to be daddy to a baby.
2007-12-11 23:33:29 · answer #8 · answered by hoppykit 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
unless i mis-read what you typed, it sounds like he's the one who wants a baby, and has said so already.
It probably won't be too difficult to bring it up to him.
2007-12-11 23:19:57 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I dont think I see where the problem is...
try telling him.
2007-12-11 23:16:10 · answer #10 · answered by This is harder than it looks? 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋