I hate my family?

Question

what i mean is, i hate what they are doing to me. The only family member i can really talk too is my grandfather. my real parents got divorced and i can remember everything! now 8 years later, im still fighting it. my dad and stepmom do nothing but bad mouth my mom when she does nothing wrong. they call her a nazi and it really hurts to hear your own father call your mother a nazi right infront of you. sometimes i wish i could just leave and live with my grandpa. my mom loves me but she too bad mouths my dad. why cant my parents see that all they are doing is pushing me away? im tired of all of this. i have no idea what to do. i was going to move back with my mom (long story) but i am starting to like my new school. i hate my home life though. i feel like they run my life! please help. what should i do?

Answer 1

explain to your parents that you dont want to hear 1 negative thing about the other parent. Their problems are theirs alone and it is tearing you up inside to hear them gut eachother.....if they cant respect each other, then at least respect you enough to not talk bad about one another..... tell them you want to live with grand dad cuz you cant stand it anymore..... maybe they will tighten up!!!! honestly is best, if they knew it was tearing you up inside, it would kill them.... yup, i say tell them.

Answer 2

If you want it to end, you have to confront the issue head-on. No matter what happened between your biological parents, your mother is still the number woman in your life. NO ONE has a right to disrespect her--including, and especially, your stepmother.

Since your parents degrade each other in front of you, you have to take an active stance against it by letting each know (calmly) that you would rather not hear anything negative about the other. Try to bring up a happy time you had as a family and talk on that. It works most of the time, and eventually the insults will stop.

Also, consider spending the summers and some holidays with your mother. She may feel alienated, resentful (not towards you), and afraid that another woman is raising her child.

Answer 3

Tuff one kid O. How old are you? Nearing 18? If your nearing 18 then hold out and you will be a leagal adult then and you will have to make your own way on the things that you have aquired thus far in life. It is not impossible but it will grow you up quickly. Still a minor? Well then, find some good friends, good friends are the ones that don't drink or do durgs by the way, that have good charater and hang around them for support. This is critical that you find GOOD friends and not bad ones. Live with one parent and try to do your best. I lived with what your going through except all I heard was one side of the story the whole time. You are going to have to learn forgiveness as an adult. I did. God Bless you.

Answer 4

Talk to your parents and let them know that you love them both but you can not handle when they talk bad about each other. Let them know how it hurts you. Also, try talking to your grandpa and maybe he can pass the word along to them. Let your dad know that you are building resentment against your step-mom because she bad mouths your mom in front of you. I just don't think it is a good policy for adults to talk about anyone while the kids are present. I hope talking to them work or else you will need counseling. God Bless You.

Answer 5

Hate is a strong word. Hate means that every time you look at a family member, you boil up inside. Trust me, there are a lot of worse scenarios for people to say, "I hate my family."
When your dad or mom bad mouths one another, simply say, "That's my mom/dad you're talking about and I'd appreciate it if you didn't talk about them that way." If they get angry and keep bad mouthing each other, walk away whenever they start.

Answer 6

hang in there until you're old enough to move. Both of your parents are selfish by badmouthing the other party and obviously very immature. They should be thinking of you and your feelings instead of badmouthing each other. Very sad situation. Study like mad in school and then get the hell away from both of them. On the other hand you might want to talk to either of your parents and tell them how you feel and that their talk is hurting you, maybe the get the message. Or tell your grandfather how you feel and he can talk to them.
Good Luck and Merry Christmas.

Answer 7

I'm really sorry. I can't say i know what you're feeling, cuz i don't, but sometimes i feel like i just wanna run away and find a different life. Just stay close to your friends. Talk to them, and have them for support. Try to tune out what your parents say. I know this may sound dorky, but you could keep a journal. Letting out you're feelings really hurts. Counselors are great too.
Also...maybe you could try talking to your parents about you? If they love you, they'll understand.

I hope this helps.
good luck =]]

Answer 8

Well the fact that your 15 means you will need to stop worrying about how they act and talk and start worrying about what you'll do when your on your own. Try to focus on school, parents act childish and HEY not everyone has to like everyone. Maybe the two never got a long, imagine if this happened!!!!! Your step monster finally says I've had it I want out, then what? Then Dad hates you? Don't push it that way, the fact that she sticks by his side through all this, shows something. Did you ever wonder if maybe your real MOm tends to push them too far? I am guessing that she does, it can happen when you don't know it. It sounds like you need to focus on other things.

If you got into a club in school, or into puzzle books, or excel in a specific subject, focus on other things besides them. They aren't going to change, this will continue till your 18.

Wake up feeling good about you, and make yourself feel good, dress nice, nice eyeglasses if you wear those, maybe try something NEW AND COOL! Highlight your hair.... Like a few blonde streaks to give it a lift. A new hairstyle. It sounds like your self esteem has gone south.

If your self esteem was better I am thinking this issue with the parents would be the LAST thing on your mind. Ask step monster, for Christmas can I have a new look? Find a common ground Andrew, say something to her like, OK today I'm going to STOP worrying about how you and my mom argue, and I am going to focus on MYSELF!

Say to Step Monster all I am asking is for a new look, and I'll try to focus on my life not yours. You have to make yourself feel better FIRST! Afterall. You are all YOU HAVE! At age 18 you are all you will have. Meet a girl in school, someone you can talk to, they are great listerners, don't talk about parents all the time, that only starts anger. Talk about yourself, what you like doing in your spare time. Try puzzlebooks, they can send your mind in another place, temporarily.

Don't blame your parents for everything. Be yourself and make your self image BETTER. Make yourself into someone YOU LIKE! If you don't like yourself NO ONE ELSE WILL EITHER! Smile more Andrew, look at life differently. See that there are two sides to EVERYTHING! FOCUS on being HAPPY! Let the parents deal with their stuff on their own PLEASE!!!!!! You need to be happy with in own skin.

Answer 9

I went through the SAME thing only minus the Grandpa....I had no one. I was so miserable. Finally I talked to my dad and then to my mom and just let them know what they were doing was effecting me negatively. I asked them both not to talk to me about the other one. Now I am grown with my own husband and still they slip up and say something about each other but they both put forth an effort for me. You have to voice your troubles and make it change.

Answer 10

I would talk to my Grandfather about the bad mouthing. Maybe he could drop the two a hint. Grandpa's aren't afraid when it comes to their Grandkids. Good Luck. Learn from other peoples mistakes.

Answer 11

ooh I have been there and done that too.... just try to ignore the name calling, but if it gets out of hand let the person saying it know how you feel...... mabey they will have some respect to not do that in front of you... I am really sorry for what you are going through.... I hope I have helped :) good luck and keep your head up!!!! and be thankful for your grandpa being there for you!!!!