Do you find mothering advice offensive?

Question

I was Christmas shoping at a store, and saw two women arguing, one lady had a temper tantrum child on her side, and the other one, probably a stranger was giving order to the mother, she had her purse out and was paying cashier, I assumed that's why she couldn't hold her child. Do you think the other woman was nosy? what would you be offended if some women wanted to give you mother advice?

typo, ::mothering advice::

Answer 1

Well, I wouldn't take any advice from a perfect ( imperfect) stranger. And, in the situation that you described, I would of been upset if someone was trying to give me advice on my child rearing qualities. I have been in similar situations and, I would never take kindly, a stranger telling me how to handle my child. In fact, when I have been in the same type of situation, I just keep my mouth shut. Who am I to tell a woman that she should do " x,y or z"?? Every situation is different for us parents'. There are just somethings in life that you just have to ignore or let go, short of child abuse.
Ruth

Answer 2

I like mom of 4's advice. if a child is doing something dangerous or is annoying others then you almost have to say something whether the parent with the child is offended or not. If that's not the case then I would probably say nothing.

I did see an instance once where the son was about 10 y/o and big. He was verbally abusing and physically abusing his mother and she was just saying "yes dear". I did say something to the 10 y/o. I should have said something to the mother too but I was too embarrased for her. I told the son if he didn't stop treating his mother that way that sometime a man nearby might punch him in the mouth and knock all of his teeth out.

Answer 3

I'd be mad as hell if some other person tried to tell me how to treat and raise my child. I have seen children do the same thing and I always just talk to them or get them to laugh at something silly. That way the mother or father can finish up what they were doing and the kid will stop yelling and I will be able to get out of there faster!! Now that does not always work, but when it does it makes life a little easier. =) I don't think people should butt in and try to tell another person how to raise a child unless it is their child or their grandchild. Even when talking about grandchildren one should show tact and respect the mother and father.

Answer 4

The mother with the temper tantrum child needs advice. Why should all the shoppers have to suffer and listen to this brat because the mother is not raising this child properly?
I would never receive advice from a stranger since my child would never act improperly in public. So I'd say no I would not be offended.

Answer 5

Generally I don't find if offensive. Even when a person gives unsolicited advice, usually it is out of caring for the child...and we need more people caring about one another. If someone is giving advice I know to be ridiculous, I just listen politely and tell them thank you, I'll look into that. Sometimes though, listening is a good thing. Once in line at the supermarket, a woman behind me told me I should get my daughter's "rash" looked at. I almost shrugged her off, but she said she was a nurse and that it looked like ringworm. I took her in, and that's what it was! I was glad I decided to be openminded and listen rather than be "offended" that someone might know something I don't.

Answer 6

Absolutely not if it will/can help. A child is just that, a child.They need love,guidance and sometimes correction of an attitude. If you lived in a village, would you let a child you know run rampant through the village and possibly get hurt or worse?. Outside interference can sometimes save lives.Friendly criticism or suggestions are not to be rude in all situations.

Answer 7

Yes, she was being nosey. She was a stranger. I don't want a stranger giving me advice on how to parent my kid. I wouldn't mind it from an older family member of friend who r experience with kids & know my kids behavior, but not from a stranger. I wouldn't interfere if I saw someone else's child having a tantrum in public.

Answer 8

solicited advice? -- sure. a head's up if my child is doing something annoying or dangerous and i didn't see it? -- absolutely. beyond that? -- no way.

i have had total strangers tell me that my baby shouldn't be out in the heat (she was in my air conditioned car with me at the wheel on the way to the air conditioned mall because my house had no air conditioning and i was trying to find somewhere cooler for her); that my child was too sick to be at gymnastics because she might infect someone with her cough (she has asthma and it's not contagious and her doctor had said she was fine to go); that i should be breastfeeding (i really wanted to but was medically unable); that i should lighten up and let my daughter have a candy bar (she has a life-threatening allergy), etc., etc. People probably mean well, but geez. MYOB unless it's a safety issue.

Answer 9

That woman was nosy & I would have taken offense, but would have politely told her mind her own and would have been done with it.

A couple months ago, a random woman (late 60's is my guess) started asking questions about our son. She got to the "Does he sleep through the night?" part & I told her no, but that we were working on it. She went on & on giving "pushy" advice and swearing how it worked for her kids. I grew impatient, but knew she was only trying to help so I let her finish & thanked her for her advice. She probably felt really good about herself for trying to help & I didn't want to take that away from her even though I wasn't going to follow her advice. She was semi-scolding in her tone too, but I didn't take it personally. I have to care about someone first to care about what they think, ya know?

Answer 10

I never have liked unsolicited advice! my son is six months old now and i don't mind advice if I've asked for it! But sometimes it seems like everyone knows how to better raise my son than me! It even gets annoying from family members at time! About two months ago i was at a family function and an uncles girlfriend was there and started handing out parenting advice to me with no regard to how i feel. (she has 4 kids and they are all REALLY BAD) I finally lost it and told her that " you've all ready F@#$%^& up your kids, let my F@#$% up mine!" I dont regret saying it either because at that point i was through with all her helpful advice!