I think my parents are giving me too much for Christmas?

Question

I am 30 years old, and my mother contacted me to inform me what she was going to give my wife and I for Christmas. I feel that the gift is too much money, and the only reason I see for it is because she is spending the same amount on my brother and sister. My parents aren't made of money and I feel that this amount is unnecessary. How do I handle this situation???

Answer 1

Tell her that you don't need it, and if she really wants to get you two something, to buy a smaller amount gift card to a store you both enjoy.

Answer 2

You could always pick out something in a cheaper price range and just tell them that you have been dying to have it and that it would be better for you and them also since its cheaper and what you really want/need. It may not work but its worth a shot.

If it doesn't work then you should just say thank you and mean it... then find some way that you can help them financially. Secretly pay a bill or two that seems to be weighing them down. I've done that a time or two....also I like slipping an extra $20 bill (small enough that she doesn't suspect anything) in my moms wallet every chance I get. She may think she's losing her mind but at least I feel better about accepting all the good things that she wants to give me and nobody gets hurt feelings that way.

Answer 3

Try explaining to your mother that although you and your wife are truly grateful for the expensive gift she wishes to give to you, you would be much happier if she didn't go to the trouble. Tell her that if she insists on giving you such an expensive gift, it will only make you feel bad and ashamed for the rest of the Christmas season. Tell her that she doesn't need to buy you anything too big and expensive and a small, cheap-priced gift would make you happy enough, maybe even just a Christmas card.

Oh, here's a good one. Maybe try to persuade her not to get you anything too expensive by making her think ahead to times when she may REALLY need the money to pay for food, bills, clothes, etc.

Good luck.

Answer 4

I understand how you feel, I am 25 years old married with 2 kids and my mom still feels like she has to give me and my older sisters equal amounts of presents. I have told her that it isn't necessary but she feels it will hurt one of my sisters feelings if she doesn't. I would talk to your mom and tell her that it makes you incomfortable for her to do this and if she could please use the money for something for herself. That it would make you really happy if she did that. But I must admit that I don't think that she will really listen. As a parent she still probably feels the need to give you nice things. Maybe you could suggest a gift exchange in the family that way your mom won't feel obligated to get everyone expensive gifts and it will save everyone money in the end.

Answer 5

This is a great question because I'm currently dealing with the same thing. Myself and my sister are just over a year apart, and my parents bought some of my presents, then bought her something which raised the bar price-wise, and in return bought me something else expensive. It's like a never-ending cycle of 1upping. I eventually just sat down with my mom and told her that I'm flattered that they think I need these things, but I really would feel guilty accepting them, so they should either take some things back or at least allow me to pay half of something.

Answer 6

You could mention that you feel it is too much.. but you should accept the gift graciously. You don't want to offend them by refusing their gift (maybe they just wouldn't feel right if they spent more on your brother and sister than they did on you, even though it may not make a difference to you.) If you want, you can return some of the "expense" by getting them a nice gift in return.

Answer 7

Tell her you think it is unnecessary. I've told my mum not to splash out too much this Christmas as there's nothing I need. At the end of the day, she may want to spend the money on you, so don't push it - you might end up offending her.

Answer 8

How nice son you are. Thinking of your parents pocket, good man.
You are giving your parents presents as well ,right?

Anyway, talk to them heartily and let them know how you feel about spending too much for you and you wife for christmas presents which is not necessary. Of course we all appreciate and welcome presents, which are just and reasonable.
I understand your sentiments regarding this issue, especially if it is your parents savings we are talking about. Feel more likely that, you should be the one who is giving them more.

But then if they are happy to give you such costly presents then, a simple warm hearted thank you will do fine. Big hugs & kissess will be great too. Parents always give the best for their children. They don't think of our status anymore or our ages, for them, we are all their children. Bless Moms and Dads!
Wish them happiness, health, and long life.

Answer 9

Be honest... tell your parents that you feel uncomfortable receiving such an expensive gift and that although you appreciate the gesture, you would prefer something else... perhaps you could suggest, instead of a gift, some type of event or dinner together (w/ your parents and your wife and yourself).

Answer 10

be respectful and try to decline her offer and gift by explaining your concern for their finances. but be humble too. you are also her son, and in the end you have to submit to your parent regarding their own actions. if the gift is out of love and not some kind of competition, or ulterior motive, then i would say, be thankful and glad. they must love you a lot. merry christmas.