If so, why do you think you had trouble bonding with your child?
2007-12-11 04:24:29 · 6 answers · asked by tangerine 7 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
I think that bonding is not a hit-or-miss deal. It is a gradual process that takes years, not minutes.
Some people make a big deal of the bonding that takes place right after birth. Yes, that is a special time, but it's still just a little bit of time.
In my experience, the bonding thing goes on and on. For example, parents who adopt children who are 2-5 years old still bond with their children and vice-versa. It is like a biological parent's bond.
Just do activities that you both enjoy and that helps create the bond. If your only interaction with your child is "do this", "don't do that". Scream- go to time out, etc. Then, it's not a positive bonding experience. This is what happens sometimes with step-parents. There needs to be some positive interactions along with the discipline.
Try spending time reading to your child, playing with him/her, singing songs together, etc. It will happen, but it will happen on its own schedule- not necessarily yours.
best wishes.
2007-12-11 05:41:09 · answer #1 · answered by Ron L 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I had trouble bonding with my son after he was born because I was unexpectedly knocked out during my c-section because I ended up freaking out on the table. So it bothered me for a long time that I never got to see him born plus I didn't actually physically see him and hold him until the next morning, my son was born at 8pm. Being drugged was the worse thing I ever went through. I was awake when they put me in the recovery room but I couldn't open my eyes and my whole body was numb, I wasn't totally there and it took a whole night of sleeping it off for the drugs to wear off. Everybody else were the first ones to hold my baby, I never got to breast feed right away, I feel I was robbed the first moments of my son's life.
Anyway it will always bother me in some way that I never got to see him born but my bond just grew over time and he's my world! He's 15mo now and he's a mama's boy!
2007-12-11 14:20:32 · answer #2 · answered by hopewishdream 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I have here lately with my 2 1/2 year old. My main problem is I took a new job six months ago working as a deckhand on a tug boat on the Mississippi river and I am gone 30 days at a time and only get 15 days with her before I have to go back to the boat.
2007-12-11 14:57:32 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'll admit it- when i had my little girl- she looked so different from my son- I could have swore they switched her in the nursery. She was HUGE and had no wrinkles- she was that big- plus she had dark red hair, my husband has black hair and mine is brown. They tried to use suction on her to get her out so she had a big knot on her head, plus she looked like a conehead. I cried and said she was ugly.
After a few days, I got over it- she's four now and the apple of mommy's and daddy's eye- I wouldn't trade her for no little dark haired tiny baby in the world. She has beautiful red ringlets that reach to her butt and gorgeous blue eyes. She is far from the baby she came into the world. It amazes me when I look at her baby pictures that they are truly the same kid. Maybe I'll post a before and after picture on here so yall can see for yourselves. Lord, I just hope the one I'm carrying now don't come out so ugly.
2007-12-11 12:54:30 · answer #4 · answered by sticky nikki 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I had postpartum depression for 3 weeks, so that made it hard. When that ended I bonded big time with my daughter, in one day. I'm hoping I dont get it with this one.
2007-12-11 12:31:40 · answer #5 · answered by Melissa 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
once i gave up breastfeeding (it was very stressful,) and gave up the guilt of not doing it (he was 3 weeks old), we bonded perfectly.
why the thumbs down because i am not perfect and didn't enjoy breastfeeding.
i
2007-12-11 13:03:16 · answer #6 · answered by Miki 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋