if you were raised w/o loving and supporting parents..how?

Question

can you become a loving a supportive person or is that possible?

Answer 1

it's up to you to decide how your life will turn out....you have to break the family curse or it will continue....your child deserves the life you wanted...raise your child the way you wished you were raised...i was raised w/o a mother and a father and i think i have done a great job with my daughter..i gave her the love i wanted as a child..i see myself so much in her....i hug her and tell her i love her all the time..feels like I'm hugging and helping my inner child

Answer 2

Yes, it's very possible to become a loving and supportive person even though you may not have had loving/supporting parents... Just raise your children the way you would have LIKED to have been raised... Or use a "role" model type of someone that you care deeply about and in turn cares/cared about you...

Answer 3

I think people are a product of heredity and environment in almost equal parts. That being said, if you have never experienced love and support, then even if you feel that way toward your child, you do not know how to express it in appropriate ways. A lot of parents who do not know how to be supportive try to push their kids rather than support them. In the same vein, parents who love their children and do not know how to express it come off as disgenuine or in some cases practice "tough love" which alienates the child. If you truly have never been in a loving and supportive parent-child relationship, then I believe it is important to take a parenting class or two. Most cities have places that offer free or discounted parenting courses, but they fill up quickly. Also, you may want to consider looking into family therapy with your parents or with your child as it gets older around the age of ten or twelve.

Answer 4

It sure is. We are older now, but one of my girl friend's husbands was raised in an orphanage in the UK (Dr. Bernardo's abuse is and has been alive since the beginning of time and if it's possible an abuser will find you. Definitely not sanctioned but difficult to control as a child and a victim) he was 10 years old when his house was blitzed in London & his Mother was killed - his Father was in the infantry & was killed as well during WW11. He was not adopted as there was chaos at the time and as he grew older he remembered his life as a child. Most folk just want to adopt babies or infants/toddlers. He wasn't alone as there were a lot like him but he did get the best education possible and apprenticed at a trade when he was 14. Kept to himself a great deal, a shy man. Met my friend and they courted for a couple of years before marrying still young, they married at 21. . They were married in the Catholic Church with all of her family (lot's of sisters no brothers) had 4 children, 3 girls & one boy and he vowed they would never be abused by anyone. Loving, caring parents, she because she always had them and he because his were gone. Hadn't spoken with them for 20 years because they had immigrated to Canada & she missed her family so much they went back to Liverpool where her family was. I visited them while I was back on a trip once and their children were all grown up & happily married and at that time they had 9 grandchildren and I met some of them it was like being in a playpen full of playful puppies, I'm speaking of the adults here, not the children. Well, trying to touch base with them last year they now have 22 grandchildren. Wow isn't that super? All happy and the men are in the trades. They work, go to church & believe in their faith, tussle sometimes as large families do, all well and healthy, stay at home extremely busy wives with contented husbands. My friends are now in their 80's and have moved to a retirement village. See all of their children & grandchildren. Does your heart good to see how it all turns out in the end. I wish them a very merry, happy Christmas and you too.

Answer 5

Your parents aren't the only ones who influence you. Even if you have an absent or abusive parent, there are others in your life who can counteract their negative effects. Aunts, uncles, grandparents, neighbors, teachers, etc. All those people can show you that there are other ways to do things, to behave, than what you may have learned at home. Nobody's parents are perfect, so you use the information you gather from dealing with family and friends to help you decide what kind of person you want to be.

Answer 6

I was raised w/o loving supporting parents!


I only had a loving supporting mom!

Answer 7

It is possible. My mother didnt care much for me or my sisters as children. She would never feed us or if we were llucky we would have bread and butter sandwhiches, no lunch, sometimes no dinner. She would smoke allsorts round us, bring many different men home and make us call them dad and even threatened to kill herself wiv a knife infront of me. My lil sister is pretty much the same, cold harted and doesnt care about much, unless its something she wants. my older sis has just got on with her life but can be horrible at times. I on the other hand have 2kids of my own and try so hard to be the opposite of my mum in every way. I always make sure there is food in the house etc. i really do care about my kids and love them soo much. So it is possible for someone who grew up without loving and supporting parents to be the total opposite.

Answer 8

Yes it is possible. I've met a few people who were mistreated by their parents but found a mentor along the way...or even suddenly saw "the light" and realized their parents' mistakes. Some people go through incredible turmoil, make their own mistakes, but then once they have a child, realize that they don't want their child to live the same life they did. It doesn't happen all the time, but it does manage to happen.

Answer 9

Yes it is possible. Just think of what you wanted your parents to do for you when you were young and if you have children of your own then do that for them. Nobody is perfect but we always try to be there for our children. I am sorry to hear you didn't have caring parents when you were raised but just remember you are a better person and you didn't need them in your life to be good so try your best for you to be a good parent and you will succeed.

Answer 10

It's called breaking the cycle. It IS possible, but more likely to work if you have therapy.
I'd go see a psychologist to discuss your family and upbringing. You may require months or years of counseling to move past the issues that come with a childhood of abuse or unloving parents.
I'm sorry you went through this, but you don't have to become your parents. Both my mom and dad came from screwed up families, with alcoholics, emotional abuse, and a covered-up sexual abuse incident. They both chose not to let that affect their children and their marriage. They have been happily married 31 years now and I am a happy and secure adult (my two sisters are as well).
Good luck to you!