Talking to kids about sex....?

Question

Okay, so the other night, my son was using the word "sex" in a sentence (my boys are turning 10 x-mas eve) so I thought I would sit them both down and have a little talk about it. Is this too young? My folks never talked to me about it, but I am sure I should tell them about it. My husband and I were both involved in the talk.... But how much info is too much info????? please advise.

Answer 1

Well that is good that you are being open with them and talking to them about sex. I know what you mean when you say that our folks never talked to us about that. Never understood why but o well. School has been teaching them as well and that is a big plus. I would suggest for you to find out from them how much they know about the topic and you can go from there as to how much info you should tell them. Good Luck to you and you are doing the right thing!!!!!!

Answer 2

They probably already know alot more than you think they do. All you can do is be completely honest with them, and answer all their questions the best you can. If you get embarrased about it then they may not want to ask you again and go to someone else. My mum was always very open with me and my sisters where sex was concerned and at the school I went to I saw my first sex education video when I was 8 years old. Its good that both you and your husband were involved in the talk. Children shouldnt be protected (to an extent eg dont let them watch porn movies) against things like this coz they will learn one way or another and I think if they learn about it now they will be more careful when they do start having sex - know to use a condom etc.

Answer 3

Talk to them

Better than them learning all that confusing nonsense from the playground that is wrong

Well what did you think your kids are talking about, when they think no adults are listening.

Be brave and tell the truth - be ready to answer some difficult questions,
It will get you some respect, perhaps not right away, but once they are in the early teens and the hormones start.
Having done The Talk already, could get you some respect over the parents that haven't

Answer 4

well 10 is definitely a young age. My little sister is 10 and she knows alot for age though. The best way to tell if they're too young is by their matrurity. If they can say the word and know what it means without giggling, then they are old enough. Use all the proper words instead of slang, and make sure he knows its not appropriate to talk about in school until he is older.

Answer 5

a little at a time, age appropriate, this is something that takes a lifetime to teach and instill, they learn most about relationships by example, parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, let them guide you, take openings they give to talk just a bit at a time , keep the door open and they will come to you, be honest in an age appropriate way, it is a myth that there is a birds and bees talk, you give a child that much info at once and it will all get lost or confused

Answer 6

My son is 10, and I've had the "sex talk" with him. Basically I just told him that this is the age where he might start to notice differences in his body and the feelings he has. I think it's important to answer any questions they have honestly, with out giving them to much information, or telling them more than they really want to know. I also tell my kids that having sex makes babies and spreads disease, and they should wait until they are married to have sex.

Answer 7

Just a little, in a way that fits in their world - bearing in mind that the hormones are getting ready.
If they seem fascinated, give them more info.
If they're bored, don't force it.

I think that at 10, the differences between a child and an adult should be part of the information as they will soon start to change.

Answer 8

unfortunatley they are learning things earlier and earlier. Kids are bright and they figure stuff out. Geez, my seven year old knows how babies are made because we breed dogs. So he figures people make them the same way. Who would have thought?

And no- we don't take my son out to watch the dogs hump- he's seen them try to mount in the house before and I don't believe in lying to my children about such things. I haven't though set him down and gave him the birds and bees talk. He just knows that the dogs are attempting to make babies.

I don't plan on telling him in detail any time soon that that's how mommy got a baby and that my baby's going to come out the same way the doggies do.

Answer 9

Where I live they say the average age for girls starting to have sex is 11. I have a female so do not remember when boys start.

I started the basics young When she started making faces I stooped. No point in freaking them out. We started with a turtle has protection so he stays safe, it was a line from a book of hers when she was young and made her laugh. Put humor in it. I also gave the condom speech to any boy she hung out with. Even if they were just friends. When teens are loaded with hormones you certainly cant trust friends. I started that in Junior high. I was really shocked how little true things kids really knew. They tend to trust what they hear from friends more then what they hear in health class. I also gave the speech to girls I saw wrapped around boys. One mom thanked me for it. I was also aware and brought in her families religious choices.

Funny story. When in Junior high my kid asks me," I know if a girl does not use a condom she can get hurt, would a guy get hurt if he did not use one?" My first response, "He would If I found out." Then we went on to the std mini talk.

You may wish to have a "make sure it fits right " conversation with your boys also. Maybe not at 10 but keep an eye open for when they are open to it. Tons of guys do not understand fit. When they pinch or fall of guys are less likely to use them.

My daughter has known since jr. high were I hide the condoms. I told her to take them if she needed them. I even made her put one in her purse for some dances. She said me being aware made it odder for her to start sex. She did not start till she was 17 and I knew about it the next day. Mostly just be there to answer the questions no mater how hard. It is better for them to search for knowledge with mom or dad then with a peer.

Answer 10

Well with my first child I talk to him when he was 9. My second child, wich is a girl and I talk to her when she was 7. Since we had her in school since she was 2yrs.I neede her to know that is not okay for anyone to touch her private parts.and you know once they know they dont see this kid of things weird out. Its normal. Example boys seen a but of a woman or breast.Its just normal.The best help for me was my friend who has older kids and I also read books on how to talk to you're kids about sex.