very messy break up help me please!?

Question

i just got out of a 6 year realtionship , actually my highschool sweetheart ever since i was 16. she has now turned 21 dumped me for another guy and times are pretty tough! All my freinds who i thought were my freinds have turned there back on me and i litterally have no one in my life right now im actually have to start over from scratch with freinds i have known for ever and my life as i know it! is there ne one that has known anyone in a similar sitiuation or anyone that has been in that sitiutation and how should i deal with it how to meet new freinds and so forth please help! im now 22 and just want to live my life i know i can come back from this i just need to realize it! thanks

Answer 1

you know this happens to many people maybe its for the best you should really get yourself out there to meet new friends you can try doing volunteer work, join a gym, or go to public places and dont be shy but remember people are attracted to confidence so maybe give yourself a liitle make over and get out there

Answer 2

First thing is to let go of any guilt regarding the break up. Being that you both were together since the age of 16 there was already a strong statistic that the relationship would not have lasted any way. Not that this lessens your pain, but knowing this will at least make you realise that the break up was bound to happen sooner or later. Look at it this way, you were too young to settle on just this one girl. I mean, without experiencing life and people how could you have been certain that this girl was the only one for you? Just know, we all have at one time or another been through this, and it hurts, seems like it is the end of the world, but it isn't. In fact it is only the beginning. You may not see this now, but the break up was a blessing. It is a way of making you move on with your life, take in new adventures, get to meet new people, this is a more healthy way of life for you. This way by the time you meet that special someone you will be ready and have more skills and knowledge on how to make a relationship work. It is all part of a growing process and you will make it. Give yourself time to move on from this. Best of luck to you!

Answer 3

Since you two were in a long, long relationship, your friends are probably at a loss as to what to say - as well as be in a position of having to choose between the two of you. It's tough for them as well.

BUT you're hurting like all h3ll and there's no way to get out of it except let yourself heal.

When you meet up with old pals - don't go on and on about how much she hurt you. Just say that you're sad it's over but that you wish her all the best in life. Whether you mean it or not - it will show that you're gracious - very important.

Tell them, no, you're not seeing anyone else right now - you have to heal from this big change first. They'll understand.

When they ask 'what happened' you are perfectly in the right to say that you would prefer not to talk about it right now - it's too fresh a situation and you're just not ready to talk about it yet.

As to making new friends, you're only 22. Now is the time to realize some of your own selfish desires - so now you can endulge in new activities - you've always wanted to go hiking along the Appalachian trail or visit a new part of the country. So now you're not encumbered - go for it.

Same thing wih job opportunities. Before, you had her to consider. Now, you can work in Paris for a year if you choose.

Either way, for right now, you're hurting - and it's OK to cry in your pillow at night. But in the day - don't let them see you sweat.

We're pulling for you.

Answer 4

It is extremly hard to start all over trust me i went through it after 4 yrs and making him my world....i didnt have any friends i thought he was all i needed, i would put my family in second place because he was my world! until we broke up and i was devestated i didnt know how to start all over and i actually didnt want to! But as cliche as this sounds time does heal.....so i let time take its coarse and as hard as it was i started to let him go but right when i was okay he would come back and he did that many times! until finally i started to but my priorities straight i realized that the time i was sad and thought i couldnt move on my family was there to pick me up.....i started meeting new people and having new great friends i got myself the job i always wanted, i also started school, i started to do all the things i always wanted to do, i started working out! i changed my number so he didnt have a way to contact me, i let go off all the people that connected us! and now i can say my life is so much better....dont get me wrong there are days i still think about him and miss him but that is normal after loving someone so much. but i am so much stronger and so much wiser and i know that whoever else enters my life and i have a relationship things will be so much better! hope this helped a little! good luck! ;)

Answer 5

Just get yourself off the couch and into the world. Don't worry about your ex and your friends. Just go the club, rec center. etc. All you need to know that u know who your real friends are and there's always people out there that will be a good friend to u.

Answer 6

For starters quit crying over spilt milk and man up. Pitiful crying woe is me and that will not get you any friends. Fair weather friends are best lost...go out and find some friends, cause its time to live a new phase of your life.

Answer 7

You will definitely get over it. The way to meet new friends is to go outside and find them. Go to the bar, mall etc and just spark up conversations with people. Trust me you will find you some new friends. Good luck

Answer 8

probably by now you know .... those were not your real friends... all the guys in my life ...after are dumped, or after they dump ... they go to the gym, take time to shape, change hair, change style.. probably they are hurt (or not)...but they prepare themselves for another girl... another friends... this time choose them wisely... relations come and go, a friendship can last for a life time...