It was getting a little crowded in Heaven, so God decided to change the admittance policy. The new law was that, in order to get into Heaven, you had to have a really bad day the day you died. The policy would go into effect at noon the following day. So the next day at 12:01 the first person came to the gates of Heaven. The angel at the gate, remembering about the new law, promptly told the man, "Before I can let you in, I need you to tell me about the day you died."
"No problem." said the man. "Well, for some time now, I've thought my wife was having an affair. I believed that each day on her lunch hour, she'd bring her lover home to our 25th floor apartment and have sex with him. So today I was going to come home too and catch them. Well, I got there and busted in and immediately began searching for this guy. My wife was half-naked and yelling at me as I searched the entire apartment. But, damn it, I couldn't find him!
2007-12-10 19:27:07 · 10 answers · asked by LAVELLE! :] 4 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
Just as I was going to give up, I happened to glance out onto the balcony and noticed that there was a man hanging off the edge by his fingertips! The nerve of that guy to think he could hide from me! Well, I ran out there and promptly stomped on his fingers until he fell to the ground. But wouldn't you know it, he landed in some bushes that broke his fall and he didn't die. This pissed me off even more, so in a rage I went back inside to get the first thing I could get my hands on to throw at him. And oddly enough, the first thing I could grab was the refrigerator. I unplugged it, pushed it out onto the balcony and heaved it over the side. It plummeted 25 stories and crushed him! The excitement of the moment was so great that right after that I had a heart attack and died almost instantly."
The angel sat back and though for a moment. Technically, the guy DID have a bad day, and it was a crime of passion, so he announced, "OK, Sir. Welcome to the Kingdom of Heaven," and let him in.
2007-12-10 19:29:02 · update #1
A few seconds later the next guy came up. "OK, here's the rule. Before I can let you in, I need to hear about the day you died." "Sure thing" the man replied. "But you're not gonna believe this. I was out on the balcony of my 26th floor apartment doing my daily exercises when I got a little carried away and accidentally fell over the side! Luckily however, I was able to catch myself by my fingertips on the balcony directly beneath mine. When all of a sudden this crazy man comes running out of his apartment and starts cussing and stomping on my fingers! Well, of course I fell. I hit some trees and bushes on the way down which broke my fall so I didn't die right away. As I'm laying there face up on the ground, unable to move and in excruciating pain, I see the man push his refrigerator, of all things, over the ledge and it falls directly on top of me and kills me!"
The angel is quietly laughing to himself as the man finishes his story.
2007-12-10 19:31:08 · update #2
Very well," the angel announces. "Welcome to the Kingdom of Heaven," and he lets the man enter.
A few seconds later the third man in line comes up to the gate. "Tell me about the day you died," said the angel. "OK, picture this, " says the man. "I'm naked inside a refrigerator......."
2007-12-10 19:31:47 · update #3
LOL to paulyap :))
2007-12-10 19:55:37 · update #4
im glad to have made your days, people. :)
2007-12-10 19:56:45 · update #5
LOL!!! I like that! .......that was great! ;)
2007-12-10 19:45:27 · answer #1 · answered by hazelle 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Is this a joke trading session or a serious question section for Yahoo! Anyway its good to hear some good jokes and since I've heard this second one from you...it has made my day! Thank you and keep the questions rolling...i mean the jokes too!!
This quick one in return for yours: God visited Hell and Satan & its inhabitants were so happy. Why? Because of technology, Hell was airconed. God got so angry he told Satan he'll sue.....Satan cynically laughed and said...Go ahead be my Guest as I've all the best lawyers to date!!
2007-12-10 19:49:48 · answer #2 · answered by paulyap1 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Excellent.
2007-12-10 20:39:11 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
hahaha
u haf make my day... cos i have a rather bad day in office cos of customers.. thank you .. appreciate it
2007-12-10 19:35:55 · answer #4 · answered by Lachinos 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
LOLLOL,great one!cheers:))
2007-12-11 01:35:20 · answer #5 · answered by X 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i dont know but the bigger joke is how to answer this question or joke so i wrote this
2007-12-10 20:20:37 · answer #6 · answered by Hrithiks fan 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
good one
2007-12-10 21:04:02 · answer #7 · answered by Shubho 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
understand
2007-12-10 19:30:54 · answer #8 · answered by sawyer 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
heard this before.
2007-12-10 19:34:06 · answer #9 · answered by duh_bluegirl 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
this is old so yea...
2007-12-10 20:08:43 · answer #10 · answered by Common Sense for Sale 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋