How do you walk the line betwen making sure your kids use birth control and teaching chastity?

Answer 1

My mother began teaching me about sex at a young age so i was comfortable speaking to her about it as i got older. She always explained to me that sex was a gift from God, and you cannot abuse this gift. Sex is a beautiful thing shared by two married persons that love each other very much. She explained to me that if you have sex before you're ready you could become pregnant, contract STD's that could later in life prevent me from becoming a parent, and she explained to me the emotional difficulties. When i turned 15 she got me on birth control to regulate my periods. It was not viewed my me or my mother as birth control because i was not ready to have sex. When i was finally ready i spoke to my mother about it to make sure i wasn't making a bad decision. She talked me out of it, and boy am i glad! I was not ready. I guess the main thing is communication. Be sure to teach the love part of sex. It is not a thing to be taken lightly, it is an adult decision that needs to not be taken lightly. Hope that helps!

P.S. If your child is bringing up anything sexual in nature in a conversation get them on birth control! Do not waste any time, do it immediately!

Answer 2

I'm not a parent (only 23 myself), but I know a bit about sex ed coming from the other side of the coin (as a kid). My parents are very religious people (I hate using that term) and utilized the Christian views on marriage to encourage me to stay celibate until married. That is all it took for me, but I know a lot of my friends didn't have that same upbringing and/or didn't buy into it.

The main thing you need to do is be honest with your kids. If they think they're old enough to start messing around, set 'em straight. You're not there to be their buddy, you're there to tell them how to live so that they can succeed and survive in a world that vastly outnumbers them. Part of that is staying away from bad sexual experiences.

I don't know what experiences you have, but if you find your kids actually start getting active, it may be a good idea to use those experiences as learning tools for them. It may be embarrassing, and you'll have to avoid the phrase "I don't want you to make the same mistakes I did", but honestly, that's the message you basically communicate to your kids on a daily basis.

I'd say, the best advice would be to teach chastity and offer honesty. If they screw up, don't disown them, but do parent them. They're just kids and kids need strong hands. Better that they slam a few doors in your face than get pregnant at 16.

Answer 3

It is a fine line to walk and actually my best friend is currently walking it.Me I have some years to go before I walk this line so I can only give it to you from a perspective of "almost".
I would preach chastity heavily in the sense of not purity per se but of self respect and what all people's virginity is worth.I would preach the side of self respect and self restraint and acknowledge that in this day and age its hard to know one's worth because we are ruled by what we see in movies and on T.V. But that what we see in fantasy is not reality and that virginity is more like a virtuous gift and not something we get rid of like trash or even a passing phase.
But I would also take the opposite stance on this and be fair to both sides of the issue.I would debate them both equally and passionately because I would want my child to be well informed in order to make her mind up.Birth control is a must as we were taught as children "better to be prepared".I would preach until I was blue what could happen if birth control were used and if it weren't used.Focus on all the main points on why its ever so important to live free of diseases,unwanted children,and bad reputation.Ultimately reminding her that truthfully it will always be her decision and that as her Mother I sincerely hope that whatever she chooses its safety first and foremost.As her Mother I would explain to her that what she hear's from those who are not virgins isn't always as glamorous as it is made out to be.But if she chooses to wait until she's older and not just mentally but emotionally prepared then it could be what SHE creates it to be...

Thats as far as it goes for me because I still have years to prefect this discussion in my head.I have many more arguments to decide on,on how best to handle this situation when it arises.

M.G

Answer 4

Tell them what you expect from them. Also make sure that they are educated on the subject and know where they can get birth control to be safe. Just because you tell them does not mean that they are out having sex every time they walk out the door. They will make better decisions if they are well informed. They will also not end up pregnant or with a disease.

Answer 5

Birth control is also good for teens with irregular periods. Its hard I know but unless the child will tell you that they are ready to have sex then birth control is the only way to make sure. Not all kids are going to be virgins till marraige. But you can at least try to make sure they are not pregnant before marraige which do you think is worse?

Answer 6

Well, don't do as my mom did...She told me she needed to have a chat with me about life and then sat down and said "Don't be an embarrassment." I was completely taken aback. WHAT???!!! That's all she said.

I took each of my boys to a doctor and had him give them a physical and then explain when they reached the age where if I accidentally walked in on them naked, they ran to close the door. That would be about 9. Some kids are more secure with their bodies than others. Then, I sent them to summer camp with other boys that summer of their 4th grade year. With my boys it was always around 9 years old. But, like I said, with others it could be younger or older.

Answer 7

well thats about all you can do. make sure they use birth control and know about chastity. you have get to a point of trust with your child when you have to be willing to accept their judgment, even if it turns out to be a mistake or not. you have to understand that you can only teach them so much then the rest is all on them. you can only pray that the wisdom and guidance will help when they are faced with the decision. because when you get down to it the moment of truth is all on them and if they are gonna do it then it is their decision. you need to let them know that any decision they make you will still love and care for them no matter what. but you feel this way or that. telling them they cant do something is going to drive them to do it in the end. so instead of telling them no, you need to prepair them from the worst even though its mot likely never to happen. noww im not saying a 12 year old should be given that kind of responsibility. but when they hit 14 you should start talking about it and in another year or so act on it to make sure they know everything about sex and what it can lead to. nothing causes misjudgement like ignorance. dont let them get away with the 'i know it all' rarely do they know it all. you need to trust that youve raised your daughter/son to the best of your abality and let them work from their. have a little faith in yourself and your child if you will. lol best of luck ^_^

Answer 8

I would suggest that you encourage abstinence (chastity is for moral dinos) because it is pretty much 100% safe; no STDs and no pregenancy. However, worst come to worst, if they can't help themselves, and since you won't be around to chill things out, make sure they know about the different types of birth control and protection. Give them a brochure or have them know the pros and cons of each. Then give them your trust, but don't forget to pester them about protection.

Answer 9

Well, I haven't dealt with this as of yet, my oldest is only 12, so we're just starting to get into puberty. But I believe in honesty. Tell your children the truth, talk to them, let them know and feel that they can talk to you. I believe that's the most important--talking to your kids. That's what I plan to do, what I have done as the subject of sex comes up.

Answer 10

tell them that u preffer then not to be sexualy active right now that its better to wait but that if they are gonna be irresponsible and have sex they can atleast be responsible enough to use birth control.