The pastor asked if anyone in the congregation would like to express praise for answered prayers.
A lady stood and walked to the podium. She said, "I have a praise."
"Yes, Mrs. Kisselman?" the pastor prompted.
"Two months ago," she began in a firm, clear voice as she turned to the packed house, "my husband, Jim, had a terrible bicycle wreck and his scrotum was completely crushed. The pain was excruciating and the doctors didn't know if they could help him."
You could hear an audible gasp from the men in the congregation as they imagined the pain that poor Jim experienced.
She continued, "Jim was unable to hold me or the children and every move caused him terrible pain. We prayed as the doctors performed a delicate operation. They were able to piece together the crushed remnants of Jim's scrotum and wrap wire around it to hold it in place."
Again, the men in the congregation squirmed uncomfortably as they imagined the horrible surgery performed on Jim.
She went on, "Now, Jim is out of the hospital and, the doctors say, with time, his scrotum should recover completely."
The lady made a slight bow of thanks and headed back for her pew as all the men sighed with relief. The pastor rose and tentatively asked if anyone else had anything to say.
A man rose and walked to the podium. He said, "I'm Jim. I just wanted to tell my wife, once again, that the word is sternum!
2007-12-10 10:47:08 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
Now this one is really funny - thanks CJ - - - - a star for you!
2007-12-10 15:44:27 · answer #1 · answered by CJ 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Define "answered prayers" though. If you pray for the lottery and some how make it through a year of unemployment, how is that not an answer to your prayers? If you pray that your father will survive his heart attack but instead dies soon after you get to his side, how is that not an answer to your prayers? Sometimes what we think we want is not what we need. A lack of unanswered prayers isn't for any of your reasons.
2016-05-22 22:27:58 · answer #2 · answered by odilia 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hilarious
2007-12-10 10:59:56 · answer #3 · answered by Christy V 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This joke had all the men in my office holding their privets until the end of the joke. That was the greatest!!!
2007-12-11 05:05:49 · answer #4 · answered by brneyedgirl 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Good One!
2007-12-10 10:51:05 · answer #5 · answered by J B 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Lmaooo.
=]
2007-12-10 11:07:20 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
thank you so much, seems someone always knows when something like this is needed. lol, really, thanks. you get a star. too bad that doesnt really get you anything big, but its the thought. God bless
2007-12-11 08:33:46 · answer #7 · answered by mom of 4 boys 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Fabulous! I can really picture that happening at church. How funny!!!
2007-12-10 12:32:32 · answer #8 · answered by Precious 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
that was funny. poor Jim , poor wifey!
2007-12-10 15:21:25 · answer #9 · answered by omahapamela 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
haha nice...some women, including myself, need to know what we say before we say it. very funny though
2007-12-10 10:52:59 · answer #10 · answered by that girl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
dat is funny. i luv it!!! wonderful. a good 1.
2007-12-11 11:24:08 · answer #11 · answered by African Queen 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋