was i a bad parent?

Question

I had 7 kids in bolivia. in 1993 we came to the united states to see if we could do better. we lived in Pittbergh for 3 years before moving to va. My oldest daughter got pergent when she was 17;. when we moved to va i told my told my oldest son to drop out of school so we can meet hands meet, because i was only working in mcddys which paid me $5.80 an hour. my other daughter also got pergent when she was 18;. my son had 2 duis and spend some days in jail for that. my son jose is doing good he works in a auto shop. My younger son Jack got arrested in july for stealing a car. that was not the only time he got in trouble with the law he was also in trouble with the law when he was younger. My youngest daughter mary hates me because i gave out a baby for adoation because he was M.R. was i a bad parent. when i was working they taked home taking care of each other and sometimes my sister took care of them but not so much. what could i be done so i wasnt a bad parent

Answer 1

Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do. When it comes down to it, eating is much more important than education.

Your daughters probably should have been a little more conservative with their bodies, but hey, it happens.

Ever heard the saying "You can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink?" Same goes for children. They are still individuals and have minds of their own. As a parent you can only show them the right way-it is their decision to take that path or not. But you certainly can't blame yourself for that.

You don't sound very depressed or sullen and even admit one of your sons is doing well at an auto shop... did it turn out ok in the end?

Answer 2

I have asked myself that question a lot over the last few years for one reason or another and the answer is no! you were not a bad parent. You know when your'e young you tell yourself when you have kids you won't make the mistakes your parents did. Well you don't you make new ones. T he truth is and l have realised this since l became a parent is that all you can do is your best l don't think anyone has the right to knock you for that.We have to work thats a fact not eveyone is in a position to be a stay at home mom. Once your kids get to a certain age they are responsible for their own mistakes having a tough life is no excuse for getting in trouble with the law it should make you want something better.You did your best l don't think you could have done anything different. take care xxxx

Answer 3

Your not a bad parent at all, sure you have had a much more difficult life than most but your children were old enough to know what they were doing when they did it and at that point there is nothing you could of done really to stop them. Mary needs to realize that maybe what you did for that baby was the best for him, and that you were trying to give him the best life that he could have. Every child reaches an age when they realize that parents don't have as much control over you as they thought. This age ranges from 14-17 (on average, there are cases when it becomes more like age 6 or 7 years.)

Answer 4

I can not tell you from one paragraph that you are or were a bad parent.
I think you could benefit from some counseling. This could help you deal with your feelings of guilt.
You can learn how to change tomorrow, but you can not change yesterday. Even if you did things that were selfish or not in the best interest of the children, you still probably did a lot of good things for them. There is no perfect parent out there.
Give yourself a break and look into getting a counselor. There is a lot of free counseling out there.

Answer 5

you weren't a bad parent. your trying with 7 children and i give you alot of props for that. Don't make your children stop school. Work as hard as you can so they can have an education. Push them to finish school and go onto college so the doors of opportunity can open for them. As a parent I'm telling you, Your children are everything for you and you should and have to do everyhting in your power to see them get through life. I want my children to not struggle like my wife and i did, and we will make sure of it. wow, 7 kids, ones enough for my wife and i. . we both made bad choices, ran away from home together cause my parents were practically non existant, she was pregnant at 15 and we still managed to get by high school with a kid, college with a kid,financed college myself for my wife and i. Hard work paid off and now i work as a corporate business analyst, wife as an accountant for a firm, we own a Condo in NJ, have two new Acura's, and our kid has all he wants and needs. We stared from NO help from our parents and now we are living the American dream. All that was TOUGH without parents to help, so please help your kids in every way and make sure they stay in school at any cost. It will pay off. Good luck.

Answer 6

you can't fix the past, you probably did the best you could. Your children are grown and they have to make lives for themselves now. You have made some mistakes that you might want to say you are sorry for to your kids, and now you must work on being a better parent and grandparent. You can still take parenting classes, which might help if you are trying to raise any of the grandkids. Good luck to you.

Answer 7

i think of there is plenty greater to it than what the mothers and fathers do. As a determine you attempt all you could to coach your little ones the nicely suited way yet basically because of the fact we are mothers and fathers does no longer mean all of us understand precisely what's the nicely suited thank you to coach the youngsters. some that seem to be great mothers and fathers could be slightly overdoing it and it has a unfavourable result on the youngster. there is genetics too, that's being shown further and extra to have an result on the psychological stability of all people, so no remember what you do they must pass undesirable. the suitable we are able to all do is attempt. And for the main section i think of maximum mothers and fathers prefer to be good for his or her little ones, then there is one's who do exactly no longer care and could in user-friendly terms look after their little ones because of the fact its required by potential of regulation. yet you could no longer assume the effect.

Answer 8

you werent a bad parent you kids just made bad decisions. you should have told them about condoms n stuff n talked about sex so they wouldnt get pregnant. and when your son got in trouble you should have made serious consquences, i mean really harsh. i think he wouldnt have that second dui or if they didnt listen you should have kicked him out. i think u needed tough love in this situation and you should let all your children finish high school so they can make something of themselves when their older

Answer 9

Probly not a darn thing... i feeel that you did what you had to do and they just need to grow up and suck it in. By the way did you tell them to do the negative things they did, I bet not.

Answer 10

Everything is too late now...you did the best you could with what you had I guess..and by the way....thanks for bringing all your problems to us in the US...