My husband and I have been married for 4 years. I was scanning through his cell phone one night looking for a number when I came across an 800 number. Of course I dialed it, I was curious. It then gave me a local number to call. This was no sex line it was a hook up line for singles!! I then scanned through his phone and I found the local number, he had dialed it. Well after this I was curious, so I browsed through his wallet, and lo and behold there was a condom hidden in one of the pockets!! We dont use condoms, and havent used condoms since we first got together. The very next day he came home late from work. He said he had to work over, (wich he never does). He then tells me that him and "the guys" at work are going to start going out every Friday night to eat at a local resturant.
Am I a fool to believe this, or is this his way of getting out to see a secret someone?!?
?Clueless?
2007-12-10 02:34:58 · 32 answers · asked by clueless 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
no one that advises you here could tell you if hes having an affair...also, be careful not to get too paranoid and start connecting insignificant things..however, what you've said does sound a little suspicious... If i were you, i would keep on observing..if it gets to a point where you can't take it anymore, just tell him and make him confess or explain himself.
good luck! xxxx
2007-12-10 02:41:07 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Talk to him, but it doesn't look good.
I'm going to get lots of thumbs down here... but back when I was younger (and much more stupid) I was seeing a married man and he spent every saturday night with me, telling his wife that he was drinking with the guys. More than one time we hooked up, got breakfast, got drinks... etc when he told her he was working overtime. I'm just saying...
Don't follow him, don't poke holes in his condoms, don't try to sneak around or 'trick him'. Talk to him. Even if he isn't cheating there is a problem with trust in your relationship and if you want to fix what is wrong the only way to do that is by having a conversation between the two of you.
Start with telling him you were looking for a number on his phone (since this is a pretty legitimate reason to use the phone and will not put him on the defensive about snooping) and tell him that you are worried about what is happening and you want him to talk to you.
Best of luck.
2007-12-10 02:44:29 · answer #2 · answered by AshaLynn 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's most likely cheating, but before confronting him with this wait for him at his place of work on friday and follow him. If he is, keep your cool, snap some pix, but don't let him know you're there.
On the other hand, if someone else had access to his phone and he really is going out with the guys or trying to shop for a Christmas present it would be wrong to accuse him. Although the condom would be hard to explain.
Then if he is just use the time while he's "going out with the guys" on friday to go see your attourney with the pix and do what needs to be done.
On the other hand, if you don't want to know or don't want to get a divorce just take his condom out of his wallet. He can't hardly ask if you took it now can he? Oh and don't forget to get a whole box of condoms for your purse. Even if you don't use them make sure you take about three or four out of the box each night he's out with the guys. If he finds them it will drive him at least as crazy as he made you!
Or, if you really want to save the marriage confront him after you take the pix and let him know its her or you and if he says you then you both need to go to counsiling. It will take a professional to get through this in a healthy way.
2007-12-10 03:01:55 · answer #3 · answered by linda_joy77 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go with your gut feeling on this. If he's doing things out of the ordinary and carrying a condom??!! Why would he need a condom???????
I would confront him on this. If he has nothing to hid he won't be upset about you finding these phone numbers. But he's going to say someone else used his phone, I would bet money on this one as being his excuse. Tell him you want to go out on Friday nights with him and the guys or find out what restaurant and say you showed up to surprise him and see if he's really there, if not confront him about this too. Don't let him think he's getting away with what he's doing.
2007-12-10 02:40:36 · answer #4 · answered by jstchel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends, I got a condom when I was fourteen, put it in my wallet and it's still there and I'm retired. Not Happy but retired. If you can see if you can follow him Friday, then walk into where he's at and see if he's with another women. The telephone might be just to hire some young ladies for a bachelor party. Look before you leap!!
2007-12-10 02:44:46 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Come on honey...something seems shady! Well here is a plan. You simply ask him randomly which restaurant he'll be at. Without going there, tell you one Friday night that you were there, and you did not see him. Watch the reaction on his face as he scrambles for answers. Or call him on a Friday night and tell him you are outside the restaurant and just want to stop by, and listen to his answers. LOL But yeah, why would a married man who does not have condoms, have one in his pocket. Don't be silly...homeboy is cheating!!
2007-12-10 02:43:18 · answer #6 · answered by ? 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If his actions have changed suddenly, and with the evidence that you have, I would say he is up to no good. Do you know any of the guys from work? how about any of their wife's or girlfriends? Maybe you can ask them if their significant other has given them the same story about going out to dinner on Friday nights, most guys would get together and go to a bar before getting together and go out to dinner together. I don't know Hun. sounds pretty fishy to me.
2007-12-10 02:45:21 · answer #7 · answered by been there 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he's on his way to cheating if he hasn't done it all ready. Confront him about this before it goes too far. He has all ready been disloyal by calling single's lines and carrying condoms on him.
2007-12-10 02:40:03 · answer #8 · answered by wellbeing 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Honey, get a clue. Sorry. I know you want to believe him. I've been there. Don't drag it out.
Show up, call him out, decide what to do sooner rather then later; Especially if there are kids involved.
2007-12-10 02:43:15 · answer #9 · answered by T S 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he is cheating on you, or at least is considering doing so. I would find his condom collection and poke holes in every single package with a needle.
2007-12-10 02:40:07 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋