So far I've given my older sis $400 to help her through a rough patch. I'm only 21 and working as an Intern, and even if I don't have it, I'll use my credit cards to help her if I have to. Tonight while I was watching movies over my bro's house, she calls and asks for $10. 2 days ago, I brought her 5 bucks for lunch. I told her I didn't have it, asks my bro and he says he doesn't either. She hangs up & calls right back saying it's hard to believe he nor I have any money. I only have $260 to my name, and explain to her that I need that for my utilities & credit card. My bro has just enough for their groceries and my nephews diapers. She took us all the way back to childhood saying after all she's been through and everything she's done for us. This pisses me off b/c I've NEVER asked her to pay me back or asked her for money in over a decade!! She cursed me to tears, said she sees how we are now and that from now on she's dead to us.
2007-12-09 23:16:24 · 22 answers · asked by charmed 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Even though I've put groceries in HER fridge twice while mine was empty for a month. I don't understand her. After all I do, I tell her no ONCE, explained to her 4x's that I have bills and I've given her all I can even when I don't have it, she still tells me off. She kept saying she doesn't believe I don't have it, that we're just telling her no b/c we don't wanna help her. I'm at my wits in with her, she's 10 yrs older than me and she just takes and takes and raises all hell when we tell her no. What the hell am I supposed to do??? I don't want to lose my sis, but she's driving me away.
2007-12-09 23:21:19 · update #1
sounds like she needs you more than you need her.
2007-12-09 23:20:48 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like your sister has been manipulating both of you for a long time...I think she needs to learn to stand on her own two feet and stop mooching off her brothers. Does she have a drug or drinking problem? If so you are just adding fuel to the fire by giving her money. Tell her to grow up and act like an adult, get a job ( or even a second job ) Apparently she is living above her means and needs to get a handle on her finances. I wouldn't worry that she has disowned you...she will be back the next time she is in a bind. I think the best thing you can do is force her to be more independent by not giving her money ( you and your brother).
2007-12-09 23:25:03 · answer #2 · answered by ridder 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your sister is a user of people. This most likey has a long history of her borrowing from you and others. I bet she hasn't had to stand on her own before, or saves for the rainy days. She seems the type that its all about her and its all about now.
But if she seems desperate for $5 or $10 then are you sure she isn't doing drugs? This might be the cry for help that she needs. Don't just dismiss this idea because its your sister and you know her. If she has steady income and all of a sudden can't pay for simple things like lunch and gets over dramitic over $10 these are signs of the problem.
2007-12-09 23:25:45 · answer #3 · answered by memberrw 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well It Sounds To Me That Your Sister Is Pretty Spoilt And Thinks That By Cursing Your Brother He Or Whoever Will Feel Sorry For Her And Give Her The Money Anyway.
2007-12-09 23:21:03 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would quit enabinling her, she is trying to hurt you because you are not helping her right now. I didn't see how old she is but if she is a minor she needs to get help from her mom and dad. If she is over 18 then she needs to get her crap together. She said what she said to you to hurt you, I would never give her another penny, you are not helping her when you do. If she needs food I would go buy her a box of generic food items that will last her awhile. There is not much else I would do. Tell her you love her and if she wants to maintain a relationship great but you do not owe her money. DO NOT get yourself into more debt for her with your credit card. She will definatly not be there when the payments are due.
2007-12-09 23:23:39 · answer #5 · answered by josephina 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know how old your sister is but she sounds a bit immature. Obviously, she's under a bit of stress but to break up a family because of a small amount is very unreasonable. You have to survive too. If she is this bad, she needs to check out welfare and paying jobs.
I was pregnant and my husband was a student when I lost my job. We did whatever it took to get money including suck in our pride and went to a welfare office. It sounds like your sister may need this dose of reality too. Hopefully, with time, she will come around but you can't give what you don't have.
2007-12-09 23:25:45 · answer #6 · answered by jediknightmaya 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How sad that some people think every one else owes them . You are clearly being used and as long as you keep this up she will always want more. This is a decision she has to make if it is worth her relationship with her Brother and Sister. Do not keep feeding her, I am sorry but she has to stand on her own two feet. One day she will realise how much you did for her.
2007-12-09 23:26:38 · answer #7 · answered by blue2blnde 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, according to risk 3 human beings in a million are going to study each line of that rambling and surprisingly much incomprehensible diatribe. human beings betray one yet another each and all of the time. there is no way you're "harmless" exceptionally considering which you admit to "hating' his stepchildren. according to risk you ought to be taught your own habit and notice in case you do no longer owe your brother an apology. whether you nonetheless think of you're harmless, now and lower back the greater suited guy or woman has to make the 1st circulate in direction of reconciliation. or purely permit your brother BE "lifeless" to you. do no longer call him, circulate to him, study his myspace pages, or have something to do with him. you may not be indignant via what he writes in case you on no account study it. And who else is going to even care what crap he places on myspace?
2016-11-15 03:23:24 · answer #8 · answered by zeckzer 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is one messed up family member, i would dis own her XD. Well dont feel bad, theres a name for this kinda thing but i know it happens ofter in familys. Sucks, thats mean lol, Well give her the silent treatment, dont answer her calls, dont speak to her, if you have to be by her ignore her as much as possible, if shes mature at all she should come to her senses.
2007-12-09 23:22:00 · answer #9 · answered by Dann (: 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your older sister shouldn't be your responsibility, you have your *own* life to live.
Sounds harsh, but send her a firm letter saying you love her but explaining why you can't keep funding her, post the letter and wait for her to get in touch.
Don't chase her. She obviously has a problem but you shoudl try not to get involved. You're only making it worse if you keep giving her money.
2007-12-09 23:20:32 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Does she have some sort of addiction?
Does she work?
I have a problem to with family members
owing me money.
They don't even feel bad about it.
Next time they ask I'm going to say " NO ".
2007-12-09 23:30:23 · answer #11 · answered by elliebear 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋