Can an Active Duty soldier gain full time custody of a child over a mother who was homemaker...?

Question

to the child for the first years of the childs life, but isnt as financially stable as the soldier is.

Basically my sisters husband is saying because he has a job, and housing and my sister (after he kicks her out of the house)
doesnt have a job, or a car of her own wont be seen as fit parent.

Is this true?
Shes the mother who left job to stay home with their child while he was deployed.

Can an active duty soldier even get primary custody of a child, if their mother is not a bad mother?

Answer 1

Unfortunately, unless he can prove a "Significant Change is Circumstance", or prove her unfit, it is slim.

I am sorry, but if you give me more information I can try and help. I am a Father's Rights Advocate in Utah.

Check my website and email me more info and any new questions:

http://www.UtahParentsUnderSiege.com/

Good Luck

Answer 2

It really depends on the circumstances. The short answer is YES, an active duty soldier can easily be granted full time custody of his/her child (in this case, his).

There are things to take into consideration. What are the reasons for the divorce? Was either spouse unfaithful (have sex outside of the marriage)? If yes, the one that cheated has less of a chance of getting custody.

You have to look at things from all sides. An uninterested party will look at only the facts and what is best for the child.

Single parents and dual military parents are required by the service to have a family emergency plan in place to care for their child(ren) in the event of emergency or deployment. This is normally called the Family Action Plan (or something to that effect, depending on the service and the unit/MACOM). So saying that an active duty soldier is unfit to assume full custody of a child based on his/her occupation is inacurate at best. This may even be the best thing for a child. As long as the parent remains in the military, there will ALWAYS be housing, health care, steady income, excellent education (especially overseas with DODDS), life insurance, dental care, and SO many other benefits that no civilian can ever say for certain that they will always have.

You have to figure that a Sergeant (E5), though has a cash income of approximately $30,000 a year, has a total income of over $45,000+ a year when you count the costs of medical & dental insurance, housing, utilities (if living on post, off post takes it up the poop-shoot), education, and more.

Answer 3

I'm a Navy Wife of 6 years.

My husband and I seperated after he came home from Iraq a few months ago. But our case was involved with the Fleet and Family Support Center, because of a one time abuse case....him towards me.

But still....I'm going to tell you what everyone told me including my advocate, when he was telling me the same thing.......he's telling your sister. Because I too was a Stay at home mom.....of 2 under 5, Stationed in Pearl Harbor, Hawaii. Devoted full time mother.

No judge will give FULL custody or even primary custody to a DEPLOYING SOLDIER.

Specially if he has already been Deployed, meaning there's a bigger chance that he'll deploy again and the kids will have to be moved...again when he does.

They will never seperate the children from the mother.....never. Unless she was an Alcoholic, or a Drug User, or Social Services was ever called on her for any reason.

So if none of the avobe...tell her not to worry. Tell her to go to Navy Jag, and get some information there. She can also get Assistance by them on how to get a Civilian Lawer for free. And if he's not passing her money...while seperated they can send a letter to the command as well. If you can call the Family Fleet Support Center to see if they can help...in any way possible.

-----As long as you have a family member....to help you. You will be keep the kids. Military LAW...is VERY different from Civilian Law. As long as the kids are provided for.....financially, that's all that matters.

And HE HAS TO PAY YOU.....child
support. Depending on his rank and the state you are in, you will get a stable amount. I was getting $320 for each child, and my husband is a K-9 Dog Handler 2nd Class in the Navy..E5. And my husband had to pay for his lawer, over $3000 in Hawaii, for a Divorce.

Plus he has to pay you, depending on how many years you were married and if you were a devoted and faithful wife, (He will need substancial proof is he's saying otherwise...and he will lie, just to keep the kids) Alimony as well. All you have to prove is that you have a stable envirorment...with Grandma or with a Sister. Just like I did, and being that he's Deploable. he will have to many counts against him.



The Fleet and Family Support Center

She must contact...ASAP.

They offer assistance with individual and marital issues, domestic violence, communication and stress issues, parenting issues and referral to community services. They will try and help you resolve your problem before it becomes a (crisis)

Good Luck to her.
:)
Lucy

P.S.My husband and I are back together...after all of the mess, and I'm happy about it, because I was seperated from him for 4 months....and it was awful...the kids suffered more than I did. Being with family sometimes.....is not easy. you don't have your own space, it's crowded...it's not the same.

Answer 4

I think the previous two gentlemen kind of missed the point of the question. Your brother-in-law would have to show cause that she was an unfit parent to have any chance at getting primary custody. She really needs to see an attorney, and quickly. He should not be able to "kick her out" as long as they are legally married. He has housing because of her and the child. It sounds from the tone of the threats you've described, that he is a bit abusive. If this is the case, it is important to make that part of the record. If he is threatening her in any way with physical violence (it is clear that there is emotional attacking going on) get the authorities involved. I don't tolerate that crap from anyone...fellow soldier or not.

Answer 5

How To Gain Full Custody

Answer 6

YES

a Judge has allot of power in divorce cases when the couple can not agree on what to do.

The Judge can order Anything he wants and that is what will happen.

The Judge can say that the child should go to a foster home if he wants.

This is why my wife and I have a Pre Nup to keep a judge from making our decisions for us. (prenups don't apply to custody or child support so when we have kids we will not be able to keep the government out of our lives if we split, so we will just have to stay together)

Answer 7

Depend on the judge, the court will be desire by outside military. If you town is military friendly then you case of winning might had more chance. But again face in fact most of time mother win over father. Also be ready to defend that they might your career as a excuse can't had your children custody. You should also seek help in your unit and ask legal assistance in the base.

Answer 8

He cant kick her out of housing.. many Soldiers have been trying to do that in the past ( when the war first broke out ), he has housing because he is Married and has a child, if anyone would leave it would be him the Soldier would go to the Barracks.. Not having a job is not a reason for any courts to take a child away from his mother.. again you need to go to JAG or tell your sister to go to JAG , as I have stated twice before they are the ones who can tell her what she is entitle too.
Nothing about this will change anyone on here should tell you to go see Jag.. choice is yours /hers.. me I would not wait for him to do anything ie stop money take my POA away, change his will , this happen to my friends .
I hope you/your sister do the right thing before he returns from Iraq , if not for yourself for your child.

Answer 9

entirely up to the civilian courts and how good lawyers they each have. But yes, unless she can prove stability financially, it is possible he could get custody.

Answer 10

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RE :Can an Active Duty soldier gain full time custody of a child over a mother who was homemaker...?
to the child for the first years of the childs life, but isnt as financially stable as the soldier is.

Basically my sisters husband is saying because he has a job, and housing and my sister (after he kicks her out of the house)
doesnt have a job, or a car of her own wont be seen as fit parent.

Is this true?
Shes the mother who left job to stay home with their child while he was deployed.

Can an active duty soldier even get primary custody of a child, if their mother is not a bad mother?
Follow 9 answers