I am 24 he is 31 we have a 3 year old and 1 year old boys. She has had problem with drugs in the past, her parents have left her. She is currently not in school and we are helping her with that as well. She is a big help around the house and with the kids. She gives us respect and respects our house. She kind of acts like a kid we never had. My family doesn't think it is a good idea as they are always judging the book by it's cover. My husbands family thinks it is a good idea because they know we need help with babysitting. What do you think?
2007-12-09 08:55:04 · 9 answers · asked by bigsan2001 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Anytime a drug habit is involved it's not a good idea to introduce that into your household especially when you have children. It sounds like she's fitting in and being helpful. However, I would be concerned about drugs still being or becoming an issue again. I'd definitely lay down some ground rules and include random drug testing for a while. She should also be in a support group for substance abuse. It might upset her but she needs to understand what a great thing you and your hubby are doing for her and that you have to look out for your children's welfare.
If it's simply because she's available for babysitting you need to ask yourself if you were interviewing for a sitter would you hire one you knew had a drug problem. As long as she's respecting you and the rules of your home and can pass the drug tests I'd say it's a good thing you're doing. However, if there is no drug testing going on you could find yourself in a very serious problem. Good for you for trying to help but you also need to protect your own at the same time. Best of luck!
2007-12-09 09:11:49 · answer #1 · answered by MISS H 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If there are no drugs or disrespect why not? Everyone deserves a family. Is she getting any social assistance if so room and board should be charged but let her know that the money is being held in trust so she can have a head start when she chooses a path for her future. It is you home not your relatives home tell them to mind there own homes and tell them some support would be nice after all you are doing society a favour by helping save a possible lost cause.
2007-12-09 17:02:13 · answer #2 · answered by Canuck1 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This could be a good idea, but I really think you should have some guidance from Social Services or Family and Children's Services. If she's abandoned as you say she is, you may qualify for foster care payments and support, too.
2007-12-09 17:00:36 · answer #3 · answered by colder_in_minnesota 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
this is a hard one.its good to have her for some reasons and others its bad.
i mean u wouldn't want her to expose ur toddlers to drugs or give them any or anything.especially if u dont knwo her whole background story.the good thing about it is that she helps keep the house clean.but if i were you i would not let her babysit ur children home alone.i would only let her watch them while you were busy doing things around the house.
this could be danger to ur children.
hop i helped.
2007-12-09 17:00:05 · answer #4 · answered by courtyg93 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think that you guys are doing the sweetest thing. im sure that she will never forget what you guys did for her. there are very few people like you in the world and it is nice to here you guys doing sweet things like these near winter time. i think that she will help you guys a lot but you guys should tell her to go back to school. she needs an education. and tell her that drugs isnt the answer...tell her no drugs when she is with you. i hope that she forgets about drugs and gets better with you guys! hope i helped good luck!
2007-12-09 17:00:11 · answer #5 · answered by dreamer 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that, as long as she respects you and your family, and follows whatever rules and regulations you have set into place, there is nothing wrong with the situation. You are helping her quite a bit, and that is commendable. Most people wouldn't bother.
What your family and your husband's families think is of no consequence. It's YOUR home and YOUR life, your choices, too.
take car.e
2007-12-09 17:21:04 · answer #6 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it's a good idea. The she has someone to look up to. If she respects your house your kids and y'all. I say keep her around. She sounds like a good kid. Y'all can use all the help y'all can get.
2007-12-09 17:02:19 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Generally this isn't a good idea, but if it works then it works. The problem is that there is no clear line of responsibility and accountability in such an arrangement.
2007-12-09 16:58:50 · answer #8 · answered by The Scorpion 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Bad idea. She could develop a crush on your husband and cause all kinds of problems.
2007-12-09 17:41:02 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋