Is this a good example of a propaganda about air pollution??

Question

All air pollution needs to stop in order to pursue the happiness for future generations. The air you breathe is important. The quality of the air we breathe can have a significant impact on our quality of life. Did you know that air pollution also can exist inside homes and other buildings? Pollution can be created by indoor activities such as smoking. In the United States, we spend about 80-90% of our time inside buildings, and so our exposure indoor can be serious. Air pollution affects people’s health and those of you who want to live a long life should take time thinking about air pollution to avoid heart or lung disease. Air pollution will get worse! Yes, pollution will get worse if people are too careless to care for the environment. Surely one day people will realize how bad polluting the air would be, who wants the air to look smoggy?

is there anything i should add to this??

Answer 1

You have some good ideas going on in here, but you don't follow up on them.

1. how will stopping air pollution help future generations pursue happiness? This is a health issue, not a happiness issue, unless you can explain how it is a happiness issue.

2. specify HOW the quality of air affects our quality of life--give examples.

3. pollution inside homes--good and you gave an example of some indoor air pollution (smoking). Can you find one or two more examples of indoor air pollution?

4. give specific examples of air pollution and how it can get worse and how it can hurt the environment and endanger health. Tell what kind of damage the pollution does to plants, buildings and people's insides.

5. if you are going to use "smoggy" then define what "smog" is.

You're off to a really good start! Finish it up and knock your teacher's socks off!