I am getting married in April 2008. My single mom isn't dating anyone and I told her she should take one of her female friends as her +1. She says that it's "against etiquette" for her to take her friend and not bring their spouse. I told her it was only rude if I only send an invite to just that person, not if she invites her as my mom's +1. I would MUCH rather have her take one of her girlfriends instead of some random person that I probably won't know at all. And I KNOW that she would have a much better time with one of her friends. Am I right?
2007-12-09 07:51:36 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
BTW : Of course I'm not going to STOP her from bringing a real date. But I do know her, and she wouldn't let loose and enjoy the day with a new guy. If she had any guy friends then I would prefer that so she could dance to slow songs too, but alas she does not.
2007-12-09 08:09:34 · update #1
I think that if one of her female friends wants to attend it would be fine. If they are married I really doubt if the husband would feel really snubbed and depressed that he wasn't invited to go along and attend. Have her ask a friend and explain to her husband that if he minds it is OK-do it on a sport event day and I will almost guarantee no problem. You are right and the bride so you would be right even if you were not. :-) In this case you are correct and right though.
2007-12-09 09:26:50 · answer #1 · answered by GunnyC 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't totally agree with the majority, I guess, because I think it's human nature to be disappointed in a situation like this. Being a bridesmaid is considered a position of honor; a wedding planner is more like hired help. You won't be in the photos, you won't stand by her at the altar, etc. The problem is, as you mentioned, there's not much you can say about it without sounding childish or self-absorbed. I think your sister could have handled this a lot better, because she had to have known you'd notice you weren't part of the bridal party. It would have been nice of her to at least mention it to you and explain her thinking. To be honest, I think you have to find a way to suck it up and enjoy the wedding. The only way to address this is head-on, and the only person to talk to about it is the bride. If you can find a way to mention it to her, fine...but I think if that was possible, you would have done so by now.
2016-05-22 08:39:20 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's under enough pressure as Mother of the Groom, without having to find a male companion that is obligated to entertain her at the wedding, like they are a couple. If she wants to invite a co-worker or a female friend, it's her choice that would make her feel comfortable at the wedding.
2007-12-09 07:55:07 · answer #3 · answered by Empress Jan 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely! Tell her to bring one of her girlfriends. Way more fun. I've had many friends get married the last few years and many of them have brought along friends when their hubbies couldn't make it. Tell her to enjoy herself! If she's worried about etiquette tell her she should only worry about it if she didn't know the bride that well.........but she does cause it's you and if you are okay with it, then it shouldn't be a problem at all.
2007-12-09 07:55:27 · answer #4 · answered by bryn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's nothing wrong with your mom bringing a female friend to your wedding her friend will keep her company.
Your right it's okay if your mom puts her down as the +1.
2007-12-09 08:06:08 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's totally up to your mom....Is she only allowed to just bring or invite 1 friend??
It's very possible that the friends spouse doesn't mind at all not coming to the wedding.......but they should at least be given the option...
2007-12-09 08:05:27 · answer #6 · answered by Giddyup 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why don't you just invite this friend and her spouse, and seat them at the head table with your mom? Then your mom is not in the position of asking the friend to go, but she'll have someone on her side, so to speak.
2007-12-09 09:26:49 · answer #7 · answered by sarah jane 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let her take who she would like. Do not force her to take someone or someone she doesn't want to bring. It's your own mother, so normal etiquette rules don't apply (as long as you discuss it and come to an agreement). Also, how dare you presume to know what is best for your own mother. She's an adult and can figure it out on her own.
2007-12-09 08:01:07 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely.
First of all, it's your wedding - you can make the rules.
Second, it's kind of you to want her to have someone to talk/sit with.
And lastly, who cares what etiquette says?
Enjoy the day and tell Mom to do the same.
2007-12-09 07:56:19 · answer #9 · answered by MARY N 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I don't think it's a bad idea as long as the husband of the friend doesn't protest. (People who don't know you very well may think that your mom is a lesbian though, but let them.) The husband would probably enjoy a day that he can lay around the house for awhile without his wife bothering him.
2007-12-09 07:56:01 · answer #10 · answered by Jamir 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋