I feel really freaked out....what should I do?

Question

My husband can't keep a job so I am wanting him to go back to school and finish his degree so he will have some security, instead of getting laid off from factories all of the time. I hate being the provider. I am a teacher and I am constantly anxious and stressed out. I see a counselor and psychiatrist. I am on all sorts of medications for Bipolar. It is hard to get out of bed to take a shower, let alone go to work. I just wish I could stay home forever and never have to see anyone again. I see my doctor tomorrow and this is a bad time of year to feel this way. I just feel stuck in a job I hate and now I have to start on my Master's degree next semester and I don't want to do that either. So I just lay around and worry all the time. I don't enjoy anything. I really worry all the time and feel sick to my stomach. I feel I will never have anything in life ever......

Answer 1

First of all you should take care of you, start exercising for the stress it really works. Then sit your husband down and tell him exactly what you wrote, see what plans he has for himself because he may not want to go to school. This should take a lot of the edge off.

Answer 2

I worked in law for a LOT of years and always made the most money too. I finally ended up going in the manufacturing area (in the office) --- I've been laid off too from 3 different places!!! It's really bad here. I know about bipolar too which can be very serious -- I'm just glad you are taking medication. I know that you can get really depressed and stressed. My best guy friend is bipolar and I've seen a LOT LOT LOT of his ups and downs but he wouldn't take meds at all so it was bad. Maybe your meds need to be changed?? I know, you've gone through a lot. We've lost a house (because of an older drug addicted son who stole all from us and I had breast cancer) and we have no credit at all anymore ---
I just went back to work last week after a 3 month lay off and I was almost afraid to go back......got out of manufacturing though. Does he not want to go to school? It's surely a good idea......and yes, I think you need a rest. The only thing is, sitting around the house with no outside life can bring you down too. It happened to me. I love TV, the computer, and have things that keep me busy (crafts) BUT it still started to get to me. The grass isn't always greener on the other side. Plus, I'm sure he's depressed too which isn't helping you on either. Hang in there. Things will get better I'm sure. We all have to learn to bounce with the ball -- up and down.....whether bipolar or not. Unfortunately, bipolar makes it 100 times worse. I know this for a fact. Best of luck to you.

Answer 3

I can sympathize with you. As I've felt this way most of my adult life.
My husband and I have been together for 21 years, Quite a numbe rof those years he wasnt able to keep full time work and went from job to job through temp agencies. He has a BS degree in Mental Health . However not much chance of using it wher eI'm at. He's worked in banks, offfices, and vets offices and well as the hospital a few times.
I've not been able to hold down full time employment here as the state considers me disables I just refuse to beilieve it, ( I view myself as living with limitations) I can live a normal life. So in Florida I worked for my parents and for the emlemntary school my kids went to. I was well liked by the co workers at the school and they didnt want to see me leave. I earned good money, and provided most of our needs and paid the bills off of my income during the school year.
So it really bothers me now to not contribute like I once did back where I was. I only came here because my husband wanted to be in the mountains for our kids. and out of the city. BIG mistake and my mom died 3 years later and I lost my chance at saving the family businesses because my sibling took everything for themselves and then threw it all away basically. So the despair can both be crippling and heavy.

I'd suggest that if you had the time and money to spare, Try to get him set up in a home based job working on line for a few hours a day. Make him his own boss . then you could hekp him out on your breaks or holidays. He wouldnt feel useless or so up in the air all the time. As maybe he'd do better using his mental level of job instead of the physical levels of jobs.
He sounds like a smart guy and could possibly benefit from being his own boss. All he would need is dedication and a willingness to learn new things. Once he got into it and got the funds he needed he could always go back to complete his degree. During the day and cut back the hours of the computer job without losing interest in either .
there are a lot of legitimate on line jobs , he just has to be willing to seek out the right one for him.

These sites will show you the many out the and maybe give you an idea of the kind right for him or you

Answer 4

You're on the right track seeing both a counselor and a psychiatrist. You need to let them know of these new occurrences. You may be at the bottom cycle of your bipolar. Medication adjustment may be needed. All that aside though, it's normal to feel overwhelmed given your life circumstances. It's very difficult being the provider when you hate your job and feel tied down without options. You might consider discussing some coping mechanisms with your counselor.

Answer 5

you have a reversal of roles, you have taken on the role of the primary provider, which is usually the man.. you have an opportunity to see and feel what men go through being the primary provider for the family. "stuck in a job I hate" how many men quietly go to a job they hate to support their family, how many men are "constantly anxious and stressed out" trying to provide for their family.

Your husband has been hurt by being laid off, but he will recover and find another job. That what we men do. Then he will be the provider again and you will have had a taste what he goes through. How will that change your relationship with him.

Answer 6

Your living the american dream girl!! Even if your man goes back for the degree, it might not help. I work and hire for a pretty nice company and when the economy is off so is everyone else. There is no doctor that can fix it... just good unselfish government. As far as the stress goes, I'd make time for a yoga, ti chi class or something to just take your mind off things a few hours a week if you can.

Answer 7

you are feeling overwhelmed because you are taking on the huge unknown of not only the present but of the future. you have some control of the present, but not the future. so....take a deep breath...sit down with a pad and paper and spend a half hour making a list of things you are grateful for in your llife. list everything...and think on those things.you may also want to take a walk outside while you think lon your gratitude list :)

when you are done, find a natebook and start a journal. today write about what it will take for you to get throughthis month ONLY. to keep your sanity , and pay your bills. dont think about anything beyond that.take one day at a time.
after chrsitmas, deal with the next week, and so on.

Answer 8

first, take deep breathes. it helps.
next calm down. life is SUPPOSED to feel scary and confusing at times. its what makes life interesting and worth living. never knowing where the next turn of the road will lead you. if your really this worried about not being secure financially or having your husband get a good job, just tell him exactly that. just tell him your worried and that you both need to do your part.
overall, just dont WORRY. find something new to do. like a hobby or craft, or travel somewhere. take a vacation. but know that worrying never helps do ANYTHING.

Answer 9

I am on prozac and I know how you feel. I don't work though but I am with my daughter who was just diagnosed with autism. I am so stressed out that I sometimes I dream about running away even though I never would. Don't feel you are ever alone, there are so many people who feel the same way. Good luck and I hope you feel better.

Answer 10

you are stressed out,no offense but your husband sounds lazy,he should be the man of the house not you,factory's don't pay **** those days,why go there,and him getting laid off all the time,com'n his BS about something,even if you are good worker no mater where,people see,appreciate,and wanna keep you,but someone like him i wouldn't count on,even do something or else.