I love my boyfriend. I would love to move in with him. ( I kinda already do because I sleep there every night) Right now his roommate is moving out and he lives in a two bedroom apartment. Hes paying about $1,200 for rent, utilities, food etc a month. He can afford it on his own but is really upset that he will be stressed and tight for money. He wants me to move in. I currently go to a university and work a crappy part time job that pays me about $150 a week. I have been able to afford gas, food, and odds and ends throughout the week AND put aside a little into savings. Also, moving into a one bedroom apartment for less would be excellent, but all ive seem to find are studion apartments...and he wouldnt like that. Help!
2007-12-09 01:15:51 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
i love him. hes not using me. i clean there anyways because i want to. IDK guys...im getting two very dif. answers from all of you
2007-12-09 02:09:50 · update #1
NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! Listen if you want to have a mariage with this dude then keep in diferent homes. He will treat you like his maid and mistress at the same time. You will be miserable while he gets all the benefits. Think what will happen if you 2 break up and live under the same roof?
2007-12-09 01:49:14 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I personally would not move. There is no reason why the two of you cannot have a jp wedding and live as a married couple if this is what you both want. I've known plenty of people who were married, and going to school; yes, it's hard, but it is not mutually exclusive - and emotionally it's no different than being in a committed relationship and going to school: it's still hard when you can't make time for your significant other, married or not. It is understandable that he wants to concentrate on school. But it seems to me that moving with him entails a big investment and a big risk for you. It is up to you to decide if you feel your relationship is strong enough to warrant such a risk. He has made it clear that he's not willing to cement your relationship any further at the moment. Now, no one but you can decide if it's worth taking a gamble. I can only say that I personally probably wouldn't do it. After a year and a half, I would fully expect to be getting married to a person; if they put other things before our relationship, it would not bode well with me, and I would rather play it safe and look for someone for whom a relationship is one of the top priorities. I wouldn't be uprooting my whole life based merely on a vague promise that someday we "might" be getting married and starting a family. The promise would have to be much more concrete for me to even consider changing my life so dramatically.
2016-05-22 07:24:11 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is the making of a tragedy.
You CAN get to know people WITHOUT shacking, and having sex right ,you are risking pregnancy, getting dumped and becoming a welfare mom hon.
YOU need to stop spending the night both of you concentrate on your education and stay in your OWN places.If you move in with him and it goes sour then what?
Especially if you sign a lease.He can get a cheaper place, or find another roomie(same gender).
You both need to get to know each other, the real you, the real him,otherwise you may do this AFTER you move in with him and it all flies apart like a 2 dollar watch being stomped by an elephant hon.You have MORE to lose and really not much to gain but sex when you want it.Use your head here.Ask your parents.
2007-12-09 01:23:10 · answer #3 · answered by Joe F 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the purpose of moving in was to share his burden of financial crisis I think its not a good idea. If he can't afford his current apartment then why not move into a new one which he can afford. I understand you love him but sometimes you have to leave something for yourself. You have to put some limitations, you have to remember that you are not still husband & wife. Whatever decision or actions you will do always think of the good & bad outcome it came have. If he do respect & love you as a person, he will respect whatever decision you will make.
2007-12-09 01:29:19 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If there are things you don't like about him, or the relationship, I would suggest you hold off on moving in until you work those out.
Living together is not about practicality and saving money, it is about keeping a healthy relationship going and you both being happy. Logic and love do not work toward the same goal.
It sounds like it will make it financially harder for you if you move in. Will you resent him for that? Will the new money-related stresses make you (or him) harder to live with? That could change things.
Move in with him because you are happy together and in love, not to save a dollar or make finances easier for him.
2007-12-09 01:22:22 · answer #5 · answered by billypea 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What will you do when he dumps you after a couple of arguments over money? Stay at home and don't live with him without a wedding ring. Let him find another roommate that will have the income to share the rent.
2007-12-09 01:20:57 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
big mistake sister, after a few weeks of playing house you will find out the realities of life, and so will he. He will see you as someone who cannot afford to live his lifestyle,and he will begin to question whether you two are really "meant to be" you will see his evil side, the one that gets pissed off when the phone interrupts his porn watching,etc. You will start to strangle him socially, and you will bring your little "boyfriend/girlfriend " thing to an abrupt end.
2007-12-09 01:24:59 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
stay where you are... you are not his roomie and you can't afford to be ther.
He might expect you to work off the part you can't pay for,,,,,,
like cleaning, cooking, etc, he can hire a maid...and you dont' want to be beholding to him for anything.
if things go wrong, where will you be.....
This is a move of convenience, not cause he really wants you there....full time.....
you need your own place and let him worry about finding a roomie to share the expenses with.
At this point, stay put.....keep your independence... it will work out better in the long run for you, with your studies etc......
2007-12-09 01:21:41 · answer #8 · answered by doclakewrite 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay cool down did he ask you to move in? He could be using you, you know like he asked you only after his roomate moved out. And are you planning to get married cause if you are maybe it's a good idea. Try to figure out what he really wants you or your hlp in finance. Try no to get hurt men really like using woman and it's nothin to do with you i think you should test him try diffrent things as soon as you feel like you don't want to stay get out. And hes picky he dosen't like it in your apartment wow spoiled. Try to focus more on what he wants good luck!
2007-12-09 01:22:44 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you cant afford to move my dear so either that you have to do without to be with him but finish your college and then get a good job and then decide to move with him if thats what you want
2007-12-09 01:19:48 · answer #10 · answered by dreamweaver 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋