i'm engaged and have been for almost 4 years
i met a guy whom i worked with who is also engaged (he works in sydney, i in perth) we developed a relationship thru email and msn
he has said that he really likes me and wants me to go to sydney in 08 and have a fling with him before he gets married, his fiancee had cheated on him twice and he thinks that this will make it square and even
talking about it excites me, but then i have thoughts that it's
bad for both relationships
PLEASE HELP!
i really need to know if this is seriously bad
2007-12-08 22:54:50 · 21 answers · asked by Brenda B 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Years down the track, when your married, you will regret being unfaithful to your husband. It will eat you up.
Stop contact with the other man. I'd be fairly certain this is affecting your relationship with your fiance.
Don't do it.
2007-12-08 23:03:22 · answer #1 · answered by Trout Pout (Lollie) 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You should be wise enough not to ask such a question. you know in your heart that this would be bad for you, the guy sounds like he just want a easy sexual experience with you. life does not bode too well with him if his fiancee has already cheated on him twice? ( if you can believe that ?). what kind of marriage is he going to look forward to is she is already seeking other peoples pleasures. love between two people should be full and complete with each other only, if this cannot be achieved, then the love is not true and any union that may take place, is surely doomed from the start. you get excited by this because he says that he fancies you but wants to get his own back on his fiancee. what a load of lies, get yourself a true boyfriend in your own area and forget about this waster.
it is seriously bad, believe me.
Chuck
2007-12-09 07:23:44 · answer #2 · answered by Chuck H 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, I think it's bad. Bad not only because you're betraying your partner's trust and you'll never be able to take it back, but also because it's an indicator that perhaps the guy you're with is not really the right one for you. If he was the right one to marry, you would not even consider cheating on him for a second. The fact that you have been engaged for 4 years shows hesitation, regardless of any excuses that you may give (not enough money, waiting for a better time, blah blah)
2007-12-09 07:03:40 · answer #3 · answered by ConfuzednDazed 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't know where to begin, but perhaps I can't state just one fact. This guy that wants to marry a woman that has cheated on him prior to them even getting married, Is an idiot. That was natures way of telling him, somethings wrong :) If you need a fling, fly to America I will meet you at O'hare and help you with that, at least I'm not an idiot.
2007-12-09 07:08:12 · answer #4 · answered by 109 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Is this seriously bad? Are you kidding?! You're both engaged! You made promises, commitments, to your future spouses! It's not okay. If you don't want to marry your fiance then break it off. If he doesn't want to marry his fiancee then he should break off his relationship. Then you can date, but don't have a fling with this jerk and then go off an marry different people!
2007-12-09 10:22:39 · answer #5 · answered by Rockit 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course this is seriously bad.
You are engaged and thinking about another man.
Maybe your finace is not the one for you!
OR you are still not ready to be tied down to a relationship.
Also keep in mind he could be doing this for you, just for the fling only to get back at his wife, not because he really wants you.
Think it over and go with your heart.
Dont try and be too logical and say 'ill be a good girl and get married' because if you have to convince yourself, then you obviously dont really want to do it.
Best wishes.
2007-12-09 08:45:37 · answer #6 · answered by ♥Amber is a New Momma 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Neither of you need to be making any wedding plans.You BOTH need to break up.He cannot trust his g/f and you cannot trust him and your fiance' cannot trust you.
THINK ABOUT IT!
A woman who really loves her fiance and WANTS to spend the rest of her life with him would NOT even consider this.The guy you are thinking of having a fling with is either just wanting to use you for sex and is saying(maybe lying) his g/f cheated and he wants to get even and what happens if someone gets pregnant or gets a disease or both?
What happens if the g/f is jealous psycho and you both end up dead?You have everything to lose and NOTHING to gain.Unless you both want to break off your engagements and start dating each other.
2007-12-09 08:20:03 · answer #7 · answered by Joe F 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
U're engaged, he's engaged & ur instinct is already telling u that if u proceed with the affair, things will go bad. So why the dilemma. It's a no go. And how sure are u that he is telling the truth about his fiance cheating on him? He might've made that up just to score.
2007-12-09 07:07:02 · answer #8 · answered by Halo 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, if you want to know, ask your finace if he's ok with that. Obviously you can't because IT'S WRONG!
I agree wholeheartedly with chilly. To entertain this idea means you aren't ready to commit to your finace for the rest of your life. I had someone come around looking for something, and when he asked me to meet up, I asked him if my fiance could come--he's left me alone since. You see, if you were ready to marry your man, he would be the most important person in your world--anything less and you're cheating both yourself and him out of the wonderful life marriage ought to be.
2007-12-09 08:10:17 · answer #9 · answered by melouofs 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have grown up thoughts about this whole thing I have known of many marriage break ups and always it is when that third person enters the equation keep those grown up thoughts and give it a miss you will have nothing to regret ~~
2007-12-09 07:00:45 · answer #10 · answered by burning brightly 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋