Why am i so cold, emotionless, numb inside?

Question

I've had a rought childhood and i use to cry about it alot.
but that didn't stop me from being a nice compassionate girl.
but now that i'm older and have experienced much more bull.. i can't cry anymore or feel any kind of emotion or compassionate feelings towards myslef or anyone else. (for example) someone close to me just died.. and i couldn't feel any remorse or sorrow. but if i do happen to feel something... it's overwhelming and i always end up hospitalizedl for trying to harm myslef due to another break down.
is there something wrong with me because i'm emotionless?

Answer 1

There is nothing wrong with you, you are not emotionless. You have just adapted a way to deal with things by suppressing your emotions. I know this cause I do it too. Compassion is a thing hard to find (when you are having a hard time being compassionate to your self) and when you are angry, hurt or in need of self healing.. I'm in the process of learning to deal with things too. Maybe you don't see all this as suppressing, I don't think that we are always aware of it as we do it. It can be a harmful to your emotional well being "not deal" with things though. My recommendation supported by years of therapy is...
Find an outlet: Express emotions that you do feel in a productive way by writing them down, singing, shouting, sewing, cooking, drawing do whatever you do that you like doing when you are feeling like breaking down or being emotional and allow yourself to cry. Replace these bad urges for self hurt. We are our own worst judgment and don't need to inflict anymore pain to ourselves then what we already have to deal with. It takes time to recover and time to build up strong (Which you already are but you discredit)
Talk it out: You need someone to listen or bounce ideas off of. No one has to battle life's rocky terrain alone! Find a counselor (especially since you had someone close pass away recently. I bet some of your numb feeling is probably the shock of this life changing event.) Not just any counselor will do you need to find someone you can trust. Ive been through about 7 in my life and only really liked two. They were female. Females relate to females better on some issues.
Find faith: If you believe in God put faith in him that he will carry you through your worst times.(not trying to put a religious spin on this if this doesn't apply) If you don't agree with this then there is still faith that whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger. You are human and not a lost cause.
I hope that you are able to use some of this even if may not directly apply to you.

Answer 2

First I'd like to say that I think many people experience this lack of feeling from time to time. I believe that this emotionless state MAY be a protection against feeling the pain of trauma. It may also be that some people grow up in an atmosphere where emotions are squashed for different reasons - considered weak, don't understand them, etc. It COULD be that you are finally in an emotional place that is strong enough, or just ready to face the emotions connected with the past trauma that you mention. If this is the case, I consider this a good, not a bad thing. It means that it's time to heal and you are no longer afraid to go through the healing process. It's also possible that you could be having a spurt of emotional growth. Emotional growth is how we truly GROW UP on the inside. It's not just reaching a certain age or mental capability. Once you go through this current period of growth, you might want to explore further why this comes in mood changes that appear randomly spread out. It's possible that you may have other issues that were never addressed and that you learned this behavior as a way to cope with your issues. I'm not saying that I think that's the answer. It's just a thought I had, that only YOU can answer. I would like to suggest that if you are dealing with grief, or that you think that's what this is, that you seek out a grief counselor to help you through this period in your life. They should be able to determine what, if any, help you need right now. If you think you have other issues to address, you can seek out a professional (psychologist/psychiatrist) to help with those issues. The best of luck to you in your search for answers. Hope this helps you.

Answer 3

Is there something wrong with you - because you are emotionless? I would turn that question around to say: You are emotionless because there is something wrong within you.

How do I know? Why do I have any right to say this? I have been emotionless myself for years.

Trauma and abuse and things that upset you - like a death of someone close to you - wears on you so that if you feel anything at all it is simply added weight to your already heavy l and sad load.

There is hope - grasp for it. I have begun feeling again. It hasn't yet come to a normal range, but it IS BEGINNING.

Therapy, Prayer, A faithful friend, or a caring family member, having a safe place to be with people who are safe, having someone who will listen and who will care, food and sleep and getting out into the fresh air......are all so helpful and healing.

Medication can be so very helpful in maintaining stability. I know my body doesn't make what I need any more. Taking meds daily is my only hope of a normal life.

Allow me to share with you what turned my life around and helped me to come back . It was something so simple that I read in the Bible. "Look at the birds of the air. They do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your Heavenly Father feeds them. Are YOU not much more valuable than they? (Matthew chapter 6 verse 26.)

Abuse can rip your insides out. Learning to care again takes genuine WORK in therapy. You have to want it so bad that you are willing to face the wounded places inside, and to stand and face God, seeking help to make you whole again.

-- Do call your therapist or psychiatrist - leave a message that someone close to you has died. They may be wanting to help you through this time to avoid another breakdown.

Answer 4

I can emphatize with you.... I also had a rough childhood that made me somewhat invulnerable to stressful situations.

More likely that your rough childhood was more of an emotional stress than physical. It is because of your emtions that you get hurt, mostly fear. And of course, a ship would never sink if the water doesnt get in and thats what you trying to do maybe. You are trying to protect yourself from getting hurt again that you just supress them inside you.

And if the water does get in, the ship will slowly sink. Of course you are overwhelmed by the sudden blast of these emotions because everything related to these emotions will come back to you (mainly your past)

Answer 5

You have experienced a lot of bad things in your life, so you eventually become used to what goes wrong. If you start caring for people more maybe you would really be full of emotions..

Answer 6

i would say it's a sub-conscious thing. self-preservation, as it were. its not that you aren't feeling it. it is that you won't admit to feeling it or wont react to the feelings. you are bottling them up, so finally when it gets to be too much, you can't help but to feel......you feel everything that you repressed all at once, hence the hospitalization. what i would suggest...... get a punching bag.....have a good cry now and then.... you will be fine. just let it go.

Answer 7

Could you be bi-polar? I assume you are seeing a dr if you end up hospitalized for suicide attempts. when you either feel too much or feel too little, you are probably bi polar and needing to get on Lithium to balance out your emotions. It will do a WORLD of good.

Answer 8

No, you're a CEO of a large corporation. You make money at everyone else's expense and you don't care. You have a yacht, a car and you can do anything you want. Enjoy it!

Answer 9

you feel that way but are not even your question shows your emotions . emotions can never be lost(maybe) . u hyave a bad habit of being alone .
thats way u are what u are now.

u need to be a bit more umm.. like me.
>;)

Answer 10

No, It's ok to sometimes not cry. You can show emotions when and wherever you want to. It's your own life.