Are these standards too high?

Question

Intelligent, ambitious, funny, interested in film/music, healthy, at least moderately attractive.
Every time I meet a guy who is seems to posses these qualities, I get nervous and think I'm not pretty enough. My face is average, but I'm not looking for Prince Charming. I know that I am cursed with my average looks. But are my standards too high? People have told me that I'm too picky? I don't really agree with them, per se, since commonality sparks a relationship.
http://i225.photobucket.com/albums/dd287/anagavalda109/Photo4.jpg

And those who say I'm a brat for politely declining the really ugly or fat guys: seriously...would you, yourself, be chasing them down? Physical standards...mine aren't that high are universal and do not conflict with inner beauty. I know I'm a good and very caring person. I wouldn't date the ugly guys, I would be a great friend to them.

how am I putting anyone else down. If anything, I'm putting myself down.

Answer 1

I dont think your standards are too high. Never lower your standards for anyone. If you think are worthy of someone with those qualities then keep searching. Forget what other people say. I've had people tell me mine are too high and simply impossible-but I'm still looking. My friends tell me that's why I'm alone. Well, I'm sorry. And no, there is no such thing as "Mr. Perfect", but I can bet you there's someone who can hit close to him.

Answer 2

From that picture you aren't average looking to me. And no I don't believe those standards are too high. But I think you have to be realistic. Meaning that your definition of intelligent could be entirely different than a guys' actual intelligence. I mean how smart do you wish him to be? scientist smart? street smart? Levels of intelligence ranges from person to person so you will always be disappointed if someone isn't as intelligent as you are but are very intelligent in their own way. When you say ambitioius, well how ambitious you want the guy to be? To get a promotion every 6 months? ambitious enough to follow his dreams? If you don't really have a set idea how ambitious you want the guy to be you could end up with a workaholic or someone married to their job and not fully invested in the relationship. And that would really suck. As for funny, that is a given that people have their own definition of what is funny and what isn't. I mean it would really suck to get with a cyncial, sarcastic person or get with someone that is a complete laugh whore about stuff either. Kind of have to break down how funny and what type of humor you really like. Because I know of people that get off on making jokes about other people then there are some that are into really stupid pratical jokes. And film/music is again open to interpretation. I just think that if you stay as open as possible with people on all your criteria there then everything should work out fine.

P.S. I am going to make a comment on what you said about fat and ugly guys. I'm no doubt sure that some guy will say the same to you. So don't put anyone down based on their outward appearance if you already don't think too highly of your own. I have some great overly healthy friends and they are the most well rounded people you can know. I am even currently interested in a guy that is pretty hefty. And he may not seem as attractive to some but I think he is really nice looking. So keep in mind that when you really do care about someone you can look past physical characteristics that you don't think are all that appealing. Oh and another thing people aren't always fat because they over eat, there are many medical reasons why people can gain weight as well. So once you get past those two things about someone's weight and looks you should be fine. Just be realistic and expect to be treated as you treat others.

Answer 3

looks are fine. better pic would help though. the room is too dark and you have a light shining over your shoulder.

your grammar is going to get you in trouble though. you will need a guy with higher then average intelligence.
"per se, since commonality sparks a relationship."
when was the last time you saw "commonality" in a sentence? im sure most people have to look that one up.

i think your biggest problem is only about 10% of straight guys fall into your standards. most will be gay.

standards can never be too high.

Answer 4

Well, it's good to have high standards because you know what you want out of a guy. And if you follow your standards, you won't be wasting anytime with guys who don't meet your standards. But, you gotta know that not many guys will have exactly what you want because there's nobody who is perfect. So, you have to kind of judge when to lower just a bit of your standards to give your potential guy a chance. You never know what you will miss if you don't give some guys a chance. Sometimes the ones you might not like in the beginning may turn out to be the greatest guys you'll ever have.

Answer 5

your standards aren't too high, your self esteem seems to be low ("I get nervous and think I'm not pretty enough"). you have more to offer than just your looks. If you think the guy is only interested in you for your looks, then you need to take a step back and look at what else there is about you that your friends like---those will be the qualities that any male who is seriously interested in you will like--the looks are just a bonus that will fade over time.

Answer 6

Your standards are not too high, but you need to match your own standards! At least you are not like me I have a list consisting of one hundred eighteen qualities that I seek in a man!

Answer 7

You look bettor than average to me! I think you may have self esteem issues or are a little scared of getting into a relationship. What do you think?

Answer 8

no! your standards aren't too high! it's refreshing to see a girl who respects herself enough to be picky...I am 24 and my standards are high and it really bothers me how everyone around me all my friends girls that are out seem to settle for anything...

you deserve a great guy just becasue you respect yourself enough to have one! that's all you need.

Answer 9

evryone of your standards sounds terrific. except for one. i dont think a guy would wear a semitight shirt and baggy pants. so if you just cross off one of those your good:)

Answer 10

keep looking for mr right but in the mean time have fun with the wrong ones
also if you keep looking for him you just end up passing him so slow down your prince charming (if he really is meant for you) will love you no matter what