I'm 9 months pregnant and I'm in the process of leaving my husband...I told him to go home for Christmas, I don't want to be around him...he is basically a horrible person. He said he doesn't care about me but wants to see his son born so he isn't going to go home. I just can't bare being around him anymore...he slanders me, critisizes me, and just plain hurts me. Do I have a say, I don't care if it was just me, I don't want him in there.
2007-12-08 12:32:36 · 10 answers · asked by elle 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
you are the only one who has the right to say who is in the room or not when you have the baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!! tell the nurse and tell them to tell security to not let him in!!!!!!!! also just do not tell him when you go in to labor. and let everyone know who you do tell not to tell him. you can go to a family members house so when you do go into labor he is not around!!!!!! This is your day and he does not have to be there if he can not take no for an answer then oh well his bad!!!!!!! congrats!!!!!!
2007-12-08 17:24:24 · answer #1 · answered by alexia's mommy 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You have the right... but you really should talk to your husband... unless he's actually violent or abusive I would say he does have some right to see the birth of his child... it is his child too.
But if he's going to make it too stressful for you, you can tell the nurses/doctor that he is not allowed to come into the birthing room but must remain in the waiting room. Someone said you can prevent him from coming to the hospital, but that's not true at all. He has every right to be in the waiting room.
Best of luck! Don't worry too much, just think about the beautiful baby that's on it's way!
2007-12-08 23:42:47 · answer #2 · answered by Rachel B 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you do have a say, just talk to the doctors before hand so they know that you do not want him in the room... it sucks that he is like that and won't be able to be there for his son being born, but you still should not be alone, try calling your mom or maybe a close friend who could possibly be the babies godmother or godfather and see if they would like to be there that way you're not by yourself during something like that... you have every say in who is allowed in the room except for the doctors who have to be there lol although i'm sure if you had a huge problem with one of the doctors as long as you expressed your concerns they would probably even get a new doctor in there... good luck with everything and i hope your not alone during that time
2007-12-08 20:37:48 · answer #3 · answered by Brandy P 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
yes, you can tell the hospital staff that you don't want him in the room. You are the patient so the say is yours. You may want to make a birth plan listing who you want with, you as well as other important choices like using drugs or not, music you may want, if you want the baby put on your stomach immediately or wrapped in a blanket first, if your breastfeeding you'll want to be sure they know so you can feed immediately, whether you would rather an episiotomy or to naturally tear if it should come to that, and who your pediatrician is. The advantage of a plan is you can go over it with your ob or mid wife so that you two can go over your preferences. Bring it to the hospital with you so the nurses and whoever is with you can be aware of your desires to help you achieve your goals. Here's a link to help you create one.
http://www.birthplan.com/
2007-12-08 20:43:37 · answer #4 · answered by Mom of 3 3 · 3⤊ 1⤋
I believe that it is up to you who you want in with you when you give birth. I have a cousin who gave birth to twin girls almost 2 years ago. About 2 months before she was due to have them, she found out that her husband was cheating on her and had been since even before they were married. She did not want him with her when she had them and her doctors and nurses respected that wish and kept him out of her room although they could not prevent him from being in the hospital. Speak with your doctor about this situation, I think he/she will be able to help you.
2007-12-08 20:53:21 · answer #5 · answered by sevenofus 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Yes. You can have whoever you want or don't want in the birthing room. He may have legal rights to your child, but he does not have the right to violate your privacy by being there. Talk to your care providers about him not being there. If all else, get a restraining order. Even though you carry a product of both of you, it is your body and your choice. Him being in the room would not in any way be benificial to you or your child by the sounds of it. Don't back down. You don't have to give in and he doesn't have the right to make you.
2007-12-08 20:41:52 · answer #6 · answered by dark_angel286473 2 · 4⤊ 2⤋
You absolutely have a say. . . but don't for a second think that your husband won't someday use that against you with your son. . . like "mommy didn't allow me to be at your birth" . . . then what will you say?
2007-12-09 21:39:41 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it will be your choice. Just make sure you let teh nurses know the situation when you are admitted. They may need to be prepared to call security as it sounds like he may be violent as well.
2007-12-08 20:37:18 · answer #8 · answered by Betsy 7 · 5⤊ 2⤋
Yes you sure do!!! If you don't want to tell him, tell the nurses that you want no one to be there. ( or whoever you don't want there. ) You can even prevent him from coming to the hospital and seeing you or your child!!!!
Since you are married you can name him the father without him being there!!
2007-12-08 20:40:47 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 3⤋
yup i think so -
call a truce for the day of the birth.
you need good memories
his signature on the birth certificate woul dbe niec also. once you have thebaby he will smile and wont be as mean. - how could he. with a beautiful baby.....
good luck
2007-12-08 20:39:10 · answer #10 · answered by a c 7 · 4⤊ 4⤋