So..been with boyfriend for almost 3 years..we are in our 20's and I talk about marriage alot...he does once in awhile and I think that is normal..we love eachother very much and have ups and dows like any relationship...well I want to get engaged when I am atleast 22 no later which will be in a year and half(we are the same age) yet he just keeps talking about moving out of his parents house and leasing a better car..he never mentions anything about our future together...a ring(engagement) or getting a place together..what do you think??? I'm thinking maybe he wants to live alone for a year or so independently and then we get engaged or something..but if he doesnt propse at a decent time then i am leaving him..i want to be engaged for 2 years and plan and stuff and i mention this to him but it seems as though he isnt thinking about these things like I am and i know he loves me but maybe he needs room...opinions! thanks...
2007-12-08 07:31:38 · 26 answers · asked by old 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I really appreciate al the answers I am getting..you guys are really making me think..thanks to all..and I will love to hear more....God Bless....
2007-12-08 07:45:06 · update #1
I understand that you want to get married. But you should not leave him because he doesn't want to get married yet. You are both very young. He has not had a chance to be by himself. Just give him some space. If you really love him then wait for him. Or at least let him know that this is what your thinking. God Bless! I will pray for you both! Yay Jesus!
2007-12-08 07:36:40 · answer #1 · answered by I love Jesus! 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well, u say that he is staying with his parents. Y would u wanna rush someone who is still staying with their parents. If he cant take care of himself how is he going to provide for both of u? I think that ui should wait. I also agree with u in some ways. I am 21 and want to get married. Weve been together for 3 years and i have a 5 month old. Who wants to be tied down at 22 though. There is so much that u havent done or seen. It seems like we would be a great married couple but im not going to rush it. Never rush a man. U might push him away. If u love him ull wait. Dont be sad.
2007-12-08 15:45:33 · answer #2 · answered by shacoya615 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give him room. You are moving to fast for me, and I don't know you. Love and commit should not be something that is based on your age or a time-line in your head but rather when it feels right. You are rushing the dating process and you are going to make him run before committing to you. 3 years is a good amount of time, but for goodness sakes you are so young. Chill back a bit, enjoy life, work hard and appreciate other things in life, rather than trying to get engaged. Don't you have a career you should be working on?
2007-12-08 15:37:58 · answer #3 · answered by Fetch! 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why should he ask you to marry him next year. He knows he can't offer you any kind of life, unless you are planning on moving into his mommy's house with him. Give him time to become a man. He has to get a good job, find a place to live, secure a future and make sure he's ready to be married. And he'll do it on his timetable, not yours. Besides, if he doesn't ask you to marry him by the time you are 22, are you going to get some other guy to ask you? Probably not. So get over it. Relationships don't happen the way you want them to, they develop over time.
2007-12-08 15:35:50 · answer #4 · answered by janicajayne 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You guys are both very young and shouldn't be in such a hurry to get married. He is still living with his parents!
I honestly don't think he's ready and if you push him into something he isn't ready for, it could blow up in your face.
It also sounds like you aren't ready yet either. "If he doesn't propose at a decent time I'm leaving him". That sounds like a child who isn't getting her way. Tell him that and I bet he would walk away. If you both are truly meant to be together, it'll happen, maybe not when you want it to though.
2007-12-08 15:39:09 · answer #5 · answered by just me 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dont think you have a big problem seems that he wants to get his priorities right moving out of his mums is a great step dont you think if he does that you two could have a house together he can carry you over the threshold of your house when you get married its a big thing after all he may not be ready for that yet remember your dedicating the rest of your life to that one person and your talking about leaving him if he doesn't propose leaves the question of how long will it take for a divorce?
2007-12-08 15:41:15 · answer #6 · answered by Hayley 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Getting married is not as easy as it seems. Takes lots of money and it's a thing for life. Maybe he just wants to be a little more responsible and needs time to be really ready for marriage.
It can also be that he doesn't want to get married. Ask him and if he doesn't have the same goals you have, then leave him. :(
2007-12-08 15:35:40 · answer #7 · answered by SleepingBeauty =) 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Why are you in a hurry to get married when your only 22?That is the time to party,its the time to let lose.
I think your boyfriend is the only sane one in the relationship since he wants to to live on his own and sort things out before you rush and get married.
2007-12-08 15:46:28 · answer #8 · answered by Reds 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You and he are not on the same page and there is no indication as to when that will happen. I think it is wise to find out what he wants and when he wants it so that you are not totally in the dark. I don't question your shared mutual feelings, only the unresolved issues of cementing you lives together.
2007-12-08 15:45:46 · answer #9 · answered by Monsieur Rick 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Or maybe he doesnt want to marry you? Seems like you made a plan without involving him. Not a lot of 20 year old guys really think of marriage.
2007-12-08 15:35:25 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋