How do we tell people we don't want wedding gifts without being rude?

Question

Hi
We are getting married in March and its both our second marriage and we have everything we need and we don't want people to feel obligated to buy us gifts....some of our relatives might not be able to afford it....are we being rude?.....and what do we put on the invitations as far as no gifts or do we put anything at all? Please any advise would be greatly appreciated....Thank You and Have A Blessed Day

Answer 1

Say just what you said here. put a small paper, don't print this on the invite, add the sheet to request that people not bring gifts as you have all that you need. you can ask them to make a donation to your favorite charity.

What you cannot do is try to substitute money for gifts. It is very impolite to request gifts of money from your guests. People might give you money instead but you should never ever ask or even hint at that. Very tacky.

Answer 2

I think that's wonderful that you have such a lovely cultural diversity in your midst! I think that while you enjoy a traditional latin wedding, you can bring your own culture to the wedding through a traditional English gift, whatever that might be. I have heard some people being a little "lost" about certain cultural gifts they have recieved and didn't quite understand the meaning. A white elephant for example is a sign of good fortune in the east. German tradition says that a large, hand carved stork is a gift of fertility and healthy children. Be sure that with your cultural gift you send a lovely card explaining the meaning. Money needs no explanation. Unless you didn't get a personal invite (meaning it came addressed to you and your husband only) then you don't have to bring a gift. His mother is generous, but that gift is from her. You and your husband are a separate family, don't piggy back on another's gift- that's tacky.

Answer 3

I wouldn't consider you rude to ask for your guests to refrain from buying gifts, but just the same, be prepared for the fact that you'll still get gifts. I know I would never personally turn up at a wedding emptyhanded.

Answer 4

I'm sure no matter how you say it, no one will be offended and it won't sound rude. I bet most people will be relieved to not be spending a bunch of money on top of whatever it takes them to get to the wedding. I wish more people thought like you, and didn't see getting married as a time to cash in at the expense of all their relatives & friends.
I hope you have a really nice wedding!!!!

Answer 5

Tell friends to tell friends that your guests can donate money to your favorite charity instead of gifts but you are right, you cannot put it in writing or be rude about it. If you get gifts, you get them, but see what your family and bridal party can do speading the word.

Answer 6

It is not rude at all! My mother did the same thing with her second marraige. People will totally understand.

A cute little idea you could do, is on the invitation just put, "We would like your presence, but not your presents."

I think your guests will understand that you both have everything you need. It isn't rude :)

I wish you every goodness in the world. I also hope your wedding is everything you hope for! Happy Holidays!

Answer 7

Write a note and put inside the invitations no gifts needed, just your presence and blessings.

Answer 8

No matter what you say, guests may want to get you a gift. You should do it "word of mouth." A request for no gift should not be included with the invite.

Answer 9

You should write something on your wedding invitations so that the guests would be informed. You could write some things like: Gifts are welcome but including us in your daily prayers would be gladly appreciated.

Hope this helps...

Best wishes for both of you =)

Answer 10

Just say "we have everything we need, no need to bring gifts because we feel your presence would be the greatest present of all!".