Is it worth reading books like Dr. Spock's books to learn how to raise a family?

Question

Or should you just stick to your instincts and do what you know best? After all, no one should have the right to tell you how to raise your children, right?

Answer 1

no - because he could not raise his own son

Answer 2

There are many highly recommended parenting books that have been published in recent years. You can find recommendations for the best ones on most parenting websites. I think you will find some of the newer literature a bit more helpful than Dr. Spock. And while no one person or book can be the ultimate resource for parenting, those books do have some helpful info. Take what you need from them and combine it with your instinct and the good things you have learned from your parents, family and friends (note that I said "good things")!! Parenting is the most precious job you will ever be entrusted with, so I think people should take every opportunity they get to learn skills to help them perform this job the very best that they possibly can. I always find it so interesting that years of education and/or licensing and continuing education are required for many trades and practices that seem trivial in comparison to the task of raising a child. Anyone can become a parent, but not everyone should...take it seriously...read, watch, listen, learn as much as you possibly can! Yes, at times your instinct will be right on, but then there are times when you find yourself way off base...that is when you will need that reading and observation. When you accept this and integrate new positive skills into your parenting then both you and your children will benefit. You can never have enough tools for this job!

Answer 3

1

Answer 4

Reading books are fine but mostly you just learn by doing these things. I didn't read books on how to raise my daughter and she turned out just fine. I think the principle of the thing is that babies don't come with books or instructions!

Part of the learning process is to learn by your mistakes and teach by example - if you get it wrong (which we all do) the key is to admit your mistakes and apologise that way you teach your children that it is ok to make mistakes as long as you learn from them.

My advice is just enjoy having your children and raise them as you see fit....if you need a little help then pick up a book or two and see what they suggest but in the end you usually just know what is right for you and your family.

Everyone has an opinion and what is right for one person is not right for everyone so you just have to find what works for you.

Answer 5

Doctor Spock's books are chock full of bad ideas. I don't know anybody who follows his teachings who raised a child I would be proud of. There are serveral much better books on the market if you feel you need some advice.

At the time that Dr. Spock wrote in the 60's & 70's, no one had ever tried his methods. People have since tried them and found out the hard way that they don't work. They visit their children in jail now.

Answer 6

We go to school to educate ourselves but why is there no education for parenthood -- the most precious task on Earth? The time for reading books on childcare is before the child is born, but most of us focus on the birth experience and decorating the baby room. Parenting instincts, particularly mothering instincts are powerful and must be respected no matter what the experts say but a wise and loving parent will listen to all points of view before making a decision that effects the wellbeing of their child. Look to your best role models and study how they raised their child and become an apprentice of life. If your own parents made mistakes, learn from them and try to do better. Our children also come to us as teachers who guide us in what to do...

Answer 7

I think most of the stuff he talked about is old fashioned now. Believe me, when you have your own children most things will be instinctive. You might ask the opinions of other parents on some minor things but the children are yours and it's your responsibility to raise them AS your children. You don't need text books for something like that.

Answer 8

Dr. Benjamin Spock's book Baby and Child Care was published in 1946, just in time for the post-World War II baby boom, and became a best-selling guide to child rearing. Pediatrician Spock encouraged new parents to use common sense and to treat children with respect. This led some critics to call him the "Father of Permissiveness," in spite of Spock's protests to the contrary. In the 1960s Spock gained new fame as a pacifist and Vietnam War protester.

Now, if you want your child to turn out like baby boomers did, by all means throw out common sense and let your child do whatever he wants.

Trivia fact: In June 1968, Spock was convicted in Boston and sentenced to two years in prison for conspiracy to aid, abet and counsel young men to avoid the draft. The verdict was reversed on appeal.

Seriously, read it, it has some good things in it, but don't become obsessed with not giving your child any discipline.

Answer 9

Going to be a new parent/husband soon? lol
I've never read them. While those books may be helpful, Don't use them to run everything you do. There is nothing wrong with reading them for getting a different point of view, or suggestions on how to do something better. Just don't base everything on them. Basically read,it, absorb it, and do what works best for you. Ok apparently Dr. SPock is bad? lol Like I said never read his books at all. So go with another authour. ;) Life expereince and your home life should've taught you this stuff.

Answer 10

I don't think there's anything wrong with reading those books. It is necessary to actually LEARN stuff, too, so they can help with that.

The thing to keep in mind is that it is ONE person's opinion, and that there are many many ways of doing things, and in most circumstances, there is not just ONE way to do things "right", with all others being "wrong." Most of those books present one view as being the only right way to do something, and that's just not the case.

So I think its a good idea to read SOME books (not all by the same author), and take what advice works, and throw out what doesn't. Ultimately, no stranger is going to be able to give advice on how every child SHOULD be raised, no matter what degrees he or she holds. In the end, you need to make informed decisions based on what is best in your situation, with your family.


P.S. It's one thing to read up some on newborn or chidl care, so you're prepared. It's quite another to take a book as Gospel and worry yourself to death if things don't turn out just as the author says it should. The best advice given to me when I became a mother was to NEVER read magazines or books that tell what a baby "should" be doing at any given time in development. There is a huge range of "normal" in infants and toddlers, and most of the time, it's going to happen when it's going to happen. So you want to make sure you aren't freaking out over something you have no control over, to the point where you are just constantly stressed.

In response to what Oklatom said about "if you want your baby to end up like the baby boomers," I submit that it wouldn't be that bad. They were disciplined a lot more than many children today, who are made to feel their wants are paramount in the family, who feel like their "happiness" (getting away with whatever they want with no consequences) is the most important thing in the world, and whose parents raise them to be friends, rather than having a healthy parent-child relationsihp.

Answer 11

Yes, they are very worthwhile! Read Dr. Spock and then immediately do the opposite of his 'teachings', lol!
Seriously, the best people to turn to for advice are those who you see as having worthwhile advice to give. Your parents, grandparents, siblings, friends, etc, anybody who does a good job of raising their children.
Our own instincts are underrated too. Don't forget, you are living with your child, raising them, feeding them, bathing them, teaching them right from wrong....nobody is going to know your children better than you will.