Forgiveness?

Question

If you had been hurt intensely by someone you loved (I'm not talking physical hurt), but they thought they were sparing you even greater hurt by doing so, could you forgive them? Or is the very fact that someone you loved hurt you unforgivable?

Diane the Succubus - That was going to be my next question. Thank you for your answer.

Answer 1

The scenerio you have set up doesn't boil down to a hurt issue for me but a trust issue...

I can forgive the person for the hurt they might have caused whatever their motive... I can not forgive them for the breech of trust and interference in my life...

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Answer 2

I agree with the above, that forgiveness helps you most of all.

Because this sounds serious, I'll be honest: I was sexually abused by my father as a child. My own anger held me back from healing. It was many years ago, and I have learned to truly forgive him. That was in no way an attempt to "spare me even greater hurt by doing so," that was blatantly wrong, no matter how you interpret it. Since I forgave him, I'm now much better. I've been able to let go of the hurt and anger, and now am even able to hug him without feeling self conscious.

There is nothing unforgivable. There are some things, though, that are tough to forgive... but it's important to do so. If you can't right now, that's fine, but honestly try to get over it. Unforgiveness only hurts yourself.

*hugs*

Answer 3

a big part of dealing with any things like this is first dealing with the immediate feelings you have coming out of the situation. But after you've managed to deal with those, you need to step back and look at the bigger picture. Is it really possible for someone to spare you alot of hurt by hurting you a little? Sometimes yes it is. LIke I said, step back and look at it from every angle. If they hadn't done it and things came around and really hurt you BAD, would that have ultimately been worse? It really depends on you and how you feel about the situation. If you can look at it and see the bright side then perhaps it wasn't as bad as it seemed... if however you don't and whatever they did was unforgivable regardless of their intentions, then move on.

Answer 4

I know what that's like, and it takes a long time for the hurt to dissipate, but if the intention wasn't malicious you should try to forgive. Considering this is under the Religion & Spirituality section, you should most certainly forgive if you are Christian, as the Bible says you must forgive 77 times (metaphor, obviously, but you get the idea). However, it must be understood the difference between forgiving and allowing yourself to be taken advantage of. Had the intent been malicious, you should still forgive so as to protect your heart from becoming cold and harboring resentment which will only hurt you in the long run, but not set yourself up to be taken advantage of.

Answer 5

Whenever we miss the mark by disobeying one of God's commands, we sin against Him. Whenever we wrong another person, we not only sin against them, but also against God. When we take a look at the enormity of God's mercy to forgive us of ALL of our transgressions, we realize that we do not have the right to withhold this grace from others. We have sinned against God infinitely more than any person can sin against us. If God forgives us of so much, how can we refuse to forgive others for so little? Jesus’ parable in Matthew 18:23-35 is a powerful illustration of this truth. God promises that when we come to Him asking for forgiveness, He freely grants it (1 John 1:9). The forgiveness we extend should know no bounds, in the same way that God's forgiveness is limitless (Luke 17:3-4).

Answer 6

All things are forgiveable by everyone. It is a choice you make mainly for yourself, to set you free from anger, hurt, and destructive emotions that ruin your mind, life, and even your body. Once you forgive, you are free to be the person you were meant to be. That person has no more control on you.
You get over it and move on. Otherwise, you are caught in a zone where your future is blocked, your dreams are dissolved, and you become someone else.

Answer 7

You say I've been hurt by someone I love who was trying to help? Well, it might take a while, but if their heart was in the right place, I would almost always forgive them.

Answer 8

People have hurt me a lot in the past. Even people that I really loved and cared about. they didn't believe that they were somehow helping me, I try my hardest to forgive them. I have forgiven them, but every once in a while I might get angry at them when they do make a rude comment to me, and if it wasn't them I wouldn't get angry. I know that I stillhave to work on forgiving them and just to love them because I still have anger toward them.

Answer 9

If they are unaware that they have deeply hurt you. It is you yho must go to them and express exactly how you feel. It is only then they can have the opportunity to (from their heart) ask your forgiveness. If our brother asks forgiveness 7 times in a day and means it we are to forgive them.--what is that passage about forgiveness say 70 times 7?

Answer 10

Someone I loved DID hurt me, dear one, but not because she was trying to spare me from anything. She did it on purpose. It was a totally evil act to intentionally hurt me and it did. But yes, I have forgiven her. Not because she asked me to, but because I am a Christian and walk the walk. I also knew that if I didn't forgive her, I would continue to hurt because of what she did.

God bless!