Okay, so a friend of mine got married last weekend. I was not able to attend because I was in the hospital having my baby. I didn't RSVP that I would attend, but rather declined because it was so close to my due date. Well my mother & sister who were also invited only attended the wedding & not reception. (They came to the hospital to be with me because my husband is out of town & could not come in for our childs birth). Rachel got back from her honeymoon yesterday, so this morning I called to ask about there trip & she said she doesn't feel like talking to me & hung up. Well I was at the store later & the cashier tells me..."I heard some people didn't attend Rachels wedding cuz you were having your baby" Why is what anyone else did my fault. AT LEAST I WASN'T THERE, to go into labor during her wedding. I have her wedding gift but I don't think that I even want to send it to her now. She hasn't even acknowledged that I now have a child either. Urgh...I'm so frustrated. I
2007-12-07 09:13:31 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
My so called friend is going around telling people that I ruined her day. I wasn't even there, for petesake.
2007-12-07 09:17:02 · update #1
That's a really snotty thing to do on her part. Like you could help the fact you were having a BABY! You Mom and sister were at the wedding, so what if they weren't at the reception. She just needs to get over it. None of it is your fault at all.
2007-12-07 09:18:31 · answer #1 · answered by Stina Lady 5 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Oh for goodness sake, some people really do believe the world revolves around them, wait til she is having a baby and maybe she will realise how tired and uncomfortable you get when you are due and that attending a wedding is not the be all and end all around that time, no matter what you did she would have been peed off with you, how can she expect your mother and sister to go to her wedding when you were in hospital, especially when your husband was not there with you??? If your friendship really means that much to you then you could always drop her a letter and say you are sorry she feels upset with you, but that your health and your child has to take priority and your mother and sister were just supporting you while your husband was not there. Personally I'd tell her to grow up!
2007-12-10 01:22:57 · answer #2 · answered by sparkleythings_4you 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow what a great "friend"! First of all, you didn't RSVP so she can't possibly be mad about paying for your meal that you didn't eat. Second of all, she's just pissed that you had your baby on "her" day. What a petty b****. Your mother and sister had every right to go to the hospital and not the reception. They went for the important part, to see her get married.
As for going around saying you ruined her wedding, she's just being petty and jealous that someone else was getting attention on "her" day. I wouldn't even send the present since she doesn't deserve it and the money can go towards your new baby. Just ignore the gossip and things will be okay. Most people should see right through her pathetic "poor me" act. I would write her off as a friend since she doesn't seem to act like much of one. A true friend would be happy that you had your baby and it was a special day for both of you. Congrats on the baby, btw.
2007-12-07 16:46:53 · answer #3 · answered by Wishing on a Dream 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you do talk to her again, I would remind her that: 1. She would want her mother and sister around when she's giving birth- especially if her husbands out of town. 2. You have no control over the choices other people make, and neither does she for that matter. And 3. If she let this affect her wedding day, then she was the one focusing on the wrong thing!!
Give it a few days and see if she cools down. If not, return the gift!
And to those that comment to you about Rachel's wedding, remind them that you had no control over when the little one showed up.
2007-12-07 09:46:56 · answer #4 · answered by kimandryan2008 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hi April and congratulations on the birth of your child! How exciting!
Well, from reading your post....I would definitely call her an "ex friend." Seems like weddings bring out the good and the bad in people. I cannot understand for the life of me, how she thinks that you stole her thunder when you were not even present at the wedding.
Send the gift along and see what happens. I think you can cross her off the "friend" list, unfortunately.
Good luck with your little one.
2007-12-07 11:28:59 · answer #5 · answered by iloveweddings 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would just sit down and write her a nice note saying you had no intention of "ruining" her wedding day, and wish her the best. You were blessed with a baby, and you didn't get to decide when he/she came. If she doesn't apologize to you after a note, I would find a new friend to take her place. I think she'll get over it, though. You could always tell her that you got pregnant first, and she had time to change her date from your due date. It's really all her fault! :)
2007-12-07 09:57:08 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
In my opinion I would send along the gift with a note of congratulations and a picture of the baby.
If anyone says anything at all to you about the wedding or your supposed friends feelings, just answer that new brides must be more hormonal than new moms and leave it at that.
I would not pursue a relationship with someone so selfish.
2007-12-07 11:39:03 · answer #7 · answered by dizzkat 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My goodness your friend is very self centred! You were having a baby for goodness sake and of course your mother and sister would want to be with you since your husband wasn't there. How on earth could the fact that they didn't go to the reception ruin your friends wedding? That is just ridiculous and very childish on your friends part. It wasn't like you planned to have your baby on her wedding day!!! I would be very upset too that she hasn't even said anything about you having your baby. She probably is just put out that she wasn't the total focus of attention and people were talking about your good news on "her" day. Very immature of her.
2007-12-07 09:45:03 · answer #8 · answered by Bears Mom 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
How dare you! The nerve to get pregnant so that the birth of your child would appear to "randomly" coincide with HER wedding day!
And steal guests away from her as well! I wouldn't talk to you either...:-)
I wouldn't pay it the slightest bit of attention now. She was being stupid. I'm sure that you are quite exausted in dealing with your new arrival. Focus on that, and furthermore, since you are tired, any convo between the two of you will be too emotionally charged.
She will realize the error of her ways. If she doesn't, you have not lost a friend.
2007-12-07 09:37:38 · answer #9 · answered by lovesapples 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your family had every right to skip out on the reception to be with you during the birth of your child. For Pete's sake, it's their grandchild/niece! Your friend should be grateful they attended the ceremony--isn't that the point of the day? So they can get married?
I'd keep the gift and write this "friend" off.
2007-12-07 09:27:47 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋