They are wonderful kids, but everytime I talk about them to my family i always see raised eyebrows. I know that they dont approve. Is there something wrong with marrying a woman with 3 kids, should I be ashamed that i would even consider it?
2007-12-07 07:44:21 · 16 answers · asked by lee l 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Why would you be ashamed? If you love her that's all that should matter. Your family will get use to it.
2007-12-07 07:48:23 · answer #1 · answered by shortcakes_maple 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There is nothing wrong with wanting to marry a woman who has three children. It's a package deal & some men won't enter in relationships where there are children, but you did. Since you have accepted your fiance's children, then do not delay marrying your fiance. It's too bad that your parents are showing their disapproval whenever you mention the children. They should be open minded & applaud you for having accepted the children into your life. Set a date soon & get married. Don't your parents realize that they could alienate you by acting this way? Has you fiance picked up on their behavior? Tell your parents that you are marrying her not "them" & you hope they will give you "both" their blessings. If they choose not to, then they are the ones who are creating the riff, not you. If her children aren't welcomed into their lives & home, so be it, then you aren't either. You're a big boy now, so get married before SHE changes her mind. If you're asking if you should be ashamed for even considering marrying your fiance, then maybe you shouldn't, IF you have to ask that. Don't let mommy & daddy lay a guilt trip on you!!!!!
**Is Mrs. 10/1 correct?
2007-12-07 16:01:29 · answer #2 · answered by Shortstuff13 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look at it this way. If you marry her you will be receiving 3 wonderful kids whom you will help support financially. You will also be apart of very special moments in their life in which you and they will always remember. You will be taking part responsibilty is giving these children the love and security they need. You will fulfilling alot of things for these children and their mother including yourself. So what exactly is there to be ashamed of. That your a good man? That you've taken responsibility for 3 great kids when you don't have to. This tells me that your a loving, caring man. No shame in that. If anything it puts you in the Saint catagory. To be so selfless and loving. Your family frowns because they fear it will be alot on you. Not to mention that they probably aren't thrilled at the prospect of 3 new kids in the family. Christmas's, Birthday's and money money money flow through their heads. Fortunately this your life and your decision. If you love her than marry her. Don't allow your family to be an excuse. These children could end up being one of the best things to happen to you. Be happy you've found love and take advantage of it as some people aren't lucky enough to know what love is. Forget your family and live your life. In time everything will fall together and you'll end up being one big happy family. Good Luck & God Bless!
2007-12-07 16:09:57 · answer #3 · answered by zerotimeforfun 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off what do you have to be ashamed of?? Cause you love a woman and her kids?? That's not something to be ashamed of. You love a woman and her children even though they are not yours. Your stepping up to the plate and doing what has to be done which their father is not. Ashamed of them no, Ashamed that your putting your wedding off over some dirty looks and what people might say YES!! If you love her it shouldn't matter what other people think just that your happy with the person you choose as your life long friend!!
2007-12-07 15:59:28 · answer #4 · answered by Miss. Nikki 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should be ashamed of yourself for even second guessing your situation. This woman has been engaged to you for three years thinking all along that she has found a man who loves her AND her kids. But all along you are worried about what other people think. If you are even second guessing it then you are wasting your fiance's time. How would you feel if the tables were turned? My advice to you is, stop caring what people think, if you really love this woman and her children then go on get married. But if you dont feel as though you love her kids then there's a problem, she comes as a package, and if you dont love all of the package, then let her go.
2007-12-07 16:33:02 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
My god, I am soooo glad that my fiance is more of a man than you are. He has stepped up to the plate, he is marrying me in July. He accepted and knew my kids came with me and he copes so well with them.
You obviously either dont love this woman enough, if you cant marry her because of her kids (that is a lame excuse)
Or you still let your family rule your life. Grow up and live your own life. If you Love this woman, then stop stringing her along and marry her, who cares what your family think or say.
2007-12-07 15:58:53 · answer #6 · answered by bluegirl6 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no there is nothing wrong with this at all!!! i do not know how old you are or if the kids are young or what but if you feel you are ready to be a father to love,support,care for and guide them as if they are your own then that is all that matters.if you love their mom then they are part of the deal.step kids can be wonderful but only you know if you are ready to be their father!!! pray about this and talk to your fiancee and then talk with her to the kids and see how they feel about this too!!! congratulations! GOD bless you and your fiancee and step kids! good luck! if you are ashamed of the kids then you are not the right man and really you would be no man at all,children should be loved and respected then they learn love and respect for others!
2007-12-07 15:54:36 · answer #7 · answered by dixie58 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When you date someone with kids, you need to decide very early on whether you are okay with it or not. Either you accept them and everything that goes along with it or you need to get out of the relationship. It's about what you want, not what your family thinks. There is nothing wrong with it if it is right for you but, it's an important and big decision, make sure that you are sure.
2007-12-07 15:49:09 · answer #8 · answered by Deanrijo 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
are you crazy..LOVE HAS NO BOUNDRIES...sweetheart one thing that i have learnt is that your family has no right to choose your partner for you...if they cared about you they would accept the fact that you love her and try to accept her in the family....
if you love this girl then stop pushing backthe date and marry her...if there are any doubts these doubts should not include your family....
if she treats you right and her kids are wonderful then do what u want to do...instead of assuming what the lifted eyebrows mean how about you ask your family what they think about your fiance...then you would definately know how they feel..you also need to express your love for her so they can see how you feel...
i bet your fiance isnt too happy about postponing it all the time...this may be hurting her alot...make things right
2007-12-07 15:52:14 · answer #9 · answered by ebony_316 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I smell Troll... one of your previous questions:
"Im having a a situation with my xgf we been broke up 3 years now but she has been trying to get get back?"
with me ever since. She even told me day before her wedding if i wanted her she wouldnt go through the marriage. Now she trying to sleep with me hard, but ive been married one year now. Its tempting because my wife has been in a foreign country the last months. However, given the time my x has been trying to get me back i dont think she would accept its just for the sex. What should i do?
2007-12-07 15:59:22 · answer #10 · answered by Mrs.10/18/08 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is your family with the problem. Why would they not want you to marry a woman with three kids? As long as you don't mind, why should your family?
2007-12-07 15:53:03 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋