My daughter cannot do a pee-pee or poo-poo in a public restroom..?

Question

My daughter started being able to do a pee-pee and poo-poo on the potty, on the toilet of our bathroom and in the public restroom.
But when she attended daycare at YMCA last February and she hated it and was scared of staff so much, she also started being scared of the flush of the public restroom.
She will be 4 tomorrow, and she still refuses to do her "business" in a public restroom.
So sometimes accidents happen...
She can do it in our bathroom w/o problems...

How should I tell her that there is nothing she should be scared of...?
No matter what my husband and I say to her, she cries and refuses...

My daughter wasn't molested, but some of the staff weren't friendly or nice (or maybe I should say they were very, very strict), and she was scared of them.
Since she didn't want to go back there, she stopped to attend the daycare after a few visits.

Answer 1

its natural to feel uncomfortable outside the comfort of your own home,

My 11 year old son

WHo HAS NOT BEEN MOLESTED

can't go potty outside the house,rather in public

So this is natural,

Basically you need to let it go and make it a NON ISSUE
stop discussing it with her and everyone else,
when you go to daycare in the morning alot enough time to take her to the potty at school, so she can associate this place with you and feeling safe and comfortable,

Accidents happen, its no biggie, most important thing is to help her get comfortable with POO ing in diffrent places,

So try and take her to granny's over the weekend,

then maybe a friends house in the evening, and then home on wednes day, and the mall on thursday

If you can try and get her comfortable with the idea of going in other places, then it won't be so bad,

Sit with her, and help her get comfy

Good luck

M

Answer 2

my daughter had the same problem and we tried absolutely everything, from spending inordinate amounts of time in public restrooms to just ignoring the issue and hoping she'd grow out of it, to talks about what she thought was scary, to even dissassembling a toilet to show how innocuous it is. she could "hold it" practically forever, so we couldn't just wait until it was an emergency because that would involve being away from home more than 24 hours (and she was okay using the potty at grandma's or a hotel). the only thing that finally did it was when we were flying on a red-eye and she hadn't used the potty in 24 hours and she just really had to go..... I'd say just keep trying, don't put on a tremendous amount of pressure, and wait until she's a little bit older.

Answer 3

My son goes to school he is 7. He will only pee at school. He absolutely refuses to go poo poo anywhere out in public. He will go at someone elses house but will hold it in school . Actually I am the same way. It might help if she has to go for you to go in and actually pee before she goes. Tell her that you got to go really bad and she has to hold it a little while longer. Maybe she is just scared people will look at her through the peep wholes, I really have a hard time with that also. I always feel like people are looking at me. ( weird I know) . Maybe if you stand in front of the door with her on the potty and let her know nobody can see her she will feel more relaxed.

Answer 4

This seems to be a common thing at this age. My 5 year old still has a hard time with the automatic toilets - she gets totally freaked out if they flush while she's still sitting down.

Have your daughter use the toilet at home just before you go anywhere, and try not to pressure her to 'go' in public restrooms unless you think an accident is imminent. If she does need to go when you are out, go into the stall with her, let her hold on to your leg, and just calmly reassure her that you won't let anything happen to her.

Answer 5

I am pretty sure pee-pee and poo-poo aren't bad words, a little childish choice of words to use to a 9th grader, but I don't think your teacher said a forbidden word.

Answer 6

She is afraid. Be sure that someone hasn't been touching her inappropriately or trying to invade her privacy at school. She is only little, but talk to her about it. Maybe she is afraid because it is so dirty, and the toilets are so much bigger than at home. Show her how to squat and put toilet paper on the seat at the YMCA daycare so that she gets comfortable with going there too. You may have to go there with her a few times until she gets more familiar with it.

Answer 7

Hi,
I've had two kids do the same thing, the best thing I've done is held them or had them hold onto my legs while they pee. They'll still scream but at least they are not having accidents. For my daughter, she's now five it took her a good few months to get used to public washrooms. My son who's 32 mos refuses and actually holds his pee in.

Answer 8

if you daughter can pee or **** in public depend on her age get a diaper for her do her business in it is simple buy huggies or pampers and put it on your daughter when you go in public. if you daughter is two put her in a diaper. diapers are much easier but you have to have the products for them such has extra diapers, baby wipes, diaper rash cream, baby powder, etc. just put you daughter in a diaper when you go in public it is very simple buy diapers that is a soultion to you problem no more being a **** chicken afriad to go to the bathroom in public. it is easy BUY DIAPERS

Answer 9

best of luck

Answer 10

that is a learned fear investigate